#dating conversations

[yourfavoritequeerfangirl]

went on a date with a guy one time and we were talking about if we wanted kids, how we wanted to raise them, discipline them, etc. he says “i’ll probably discipline my kids how my parents disciplined me.”

i say “and how’s that?”

dude shrugs and goes “idk but my dad hit me with a piano wire one time and it did the job.”

HUH??

[coupalapp]

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[redhyacinth]

Oscar: "So one of my friends asked me who wears the pants in the relationship. what do you think?" Me: "there really isn't a dominant.....I suppose you have, like, 2/3 of the pants and I just have denim underwear XD

[kallibeth]

Rebecca S, and her SOUND OFF on Men in NYC (I've been really busy, this has been in my Inbox foreverrrr)

Oh, you're in finance? What department? Oh, back office. So does the janitor at your firm say he's in finance too?

Oh, you're running a marathon? It must be so good not to care about money, and have a job with so much free time.

No, I don't like me job. I should go back to stripping.

Oh, no, I don't smoke pot. How many years have you been out of college?

Guy: what kind of music do you like? me: classical. END OF CONVERSATION

Oh, you met your last girlfriend on Jdate. You must be so confident to meet new people in a city where you don't have many friends.

Guy tells you you have a beautiful body. me: oh, I am in the awkward in between phase where all the weight goes to my boobs and butt. I am gaining 100 lbs for a documentary

 Oh, you're a musician? What kind of food do they serve at the restaurant you work at.

  Guy at a bar: you have a beautiful smile me: Sorry, I was smiling at my friend, behind you.

  I always think the guy should pay *proceed to order the lobster*

  You're in luck. Ever since I found out I was HIV positive, my standards on dating have lowered significantly.

  Liberal Arts college? It must be so nice not to have any career pressure. What are you doing now?

  Guy: So, how do you like New York? Me: I find it really hard to connect with people. *Stare at him for an uncomfortable amount of time.*

  Me: *say a big word that he doesn't understand* Oh, I guess it's true what they say in education too. You get what you pay for.

  Guy: Yea, I work in *insert low paying job here*, there isn't much prestige or money, but I am doing good in the world and I love what I do. Me: I only care about money and prestige.

  Guy at a bar: Can I buy you a drink Me: No Guy: why? Me: I think you are going to slip me a roofie.