The Chaotic Gay Drama: Story of David Watts and the Kinks
Jon Savage, "The Kinks. The Official Biography" (1984): "David Watts is a real person. He was a concert promoter in Rutland."
Ray Davies, Q Magazine (2016): "My brother Dave was in a flamboyant mood and I could see that David Watts had a crush on him. So I tried to persuade Dave to marry David Watts because he was connected to Rutland Brewery. See, that's how stupid my brain was. I thought, 'If I can get Dave fixed up with this Watts guy, I'll be set for life and get all I want.'"
But you may ask: where's the drama?! To find out, we have to turn to Ray Davies' autobiography, "X-Ray" (1994). The story is much more detailed:
"One notable gig was in Rutland, the smallest country in England. [...] The gig was in a marquee which had been erected specially for the concert in a village called Oakham, and a local major (retired), David Watts, was the promoter. [...] David Watts looked the part of a major, and dressed in a manner which became an ex-member of the Queen's Own Hussars. Except that he was wearing white socks. It was unusual in those days even for rock'n'rollers to wear white socks. White socks and polo-necked sweaters were to anyone aware at the time an outward sign that you were either gay or at least prepared to venture to the other side when the occasion demanded. This meant, in the language of Avory, 'versatile'. I thought this to be the most unlikely, especially as the Major's voice was deep and masculine. Mick disagreed and shook his head.
The Kinks dashed offstage after the show and headed straight for David Watts' cottage. In the midst of the changing our sweaty undies, David Watts arrived with crateloads of Rutland beer and opened a refrigerator full of pink champagne. Mick seized the opportunity to prove a point and dropped his trousers in front of the Major, then proceeded to prance around like a tart. I asked the Major if he fancied Mick. He said, 'Oh God, no, not that slut. I'm more interested in that little whore," and pointed to Dave, who was dancing with Mick. [...] After downing half a bottle of Pinkers, I decided that positive action should be taken. I seized the moment and started negotiations with the Major for my brother's hand, thinking that he would be outraged at this suggestion and have us thrown out. Was he actually interested? Or was he just playing along? Here was an opportunity of finally unloading my little brother. While Mick and Dave danced tantalizingly cheek to cheek, I tried to put together a deal whereby the Major would leave Dave his entire estate, brewery included, if the two should ever break up. Mick thought I was making a deal which included himself as part of the package, and he was disappointed to hear that it was to be Dave who would be the sole beneficiary of this potential liaison. I did not think it necessary to inform Dave of the transaction. The party went on til the early hours, and everyone was dancing with everyone else until Bill Collins sensibly suggested that it was time to leave as there was a long drive home. By this time David Watts was in full flow, romancing Dave on a swing in the back garden, and he was in a very emotional state when we dragged Dave away. David Watts realized by now that Dave was indeed a slut, and a disloyal one at that. Avory took the distraught major to one side and explained that Dave was renowed as a heart-breaker. After the tears had been mopped up and all emotions were in order, David Watts declared his fondness for the whole group and announced that the Kinks would be welcome in his house whenever we felt like dropping by. We promised to see him again the next time we performed in this area."
