“He’s still there?” Fixer inquired quietly, tucking his wrench into its holster as he took his place beside his colleague.
“Yep. And it’s after lunch, time to pay up.” Drummer Boy said with a shake of his head and a small chuckle, though it was half hearted at best. The situation was far from amusing and this observation was just an attempt to make the atmosphere at HQ a little lighter.
“What are you two staring at?”
The booming voice made both the agents jump out of their feet. Glory swung an arm around each of their shoulders and stuck her head through the middle of them to get a better look.
“Deacon’s worried. Can you believe it?” Fixer whispered, trying to prevent the Railroad’s best agent from overhearing them.
He didn’t need to worry, Deacon was so deep in thought that he hadn’t even flinched at the sound of Glory cannonballing into the conversation.
Too many thoughts and none of them good. He’d been back to this corner of HQ countless times since he’d woken up and found her long gone. The thoughts were only getting faster the longer he was forced to wait for her to come back.
If she even made it back.
Fuck.
That was one of the most frequent ones and every time he looked at her name on the board - a pit of dread formed in his stomach at the thought of having to cross it out.
“Well now I’ve seen everything,”
Deacon had to catch his glasses as Glory’s hand slapped his shoulder and knocked him off balance.
“Am I seeing Deacon, our Deacon, pining because his girlfriend has gone on a mission without him? Someone pinch me I must be dreaming.” She laughed and slumped against the wall.
“That an invite? Maybe we should use a kick, just to be sure.” He smirked, though he hoped the heat in his cheeks wasn’t as visible as it felt. He didn’t know why remarks like that bothered him, if it were anyone else here he’d be the first one to make them.
“She really went off on her own to hunt the courser, huh? Lady Luck really likes to test her name,” Glory clicked her tongue and glanced at the list of agents written on their communal board with a heavy sigh.
“Yeah, apparently so.” Deacon muttered, for once not being able to even fake a smile.
“We lose agents every day. Ain’t ever seen you care this much. You’re real soft on her, aren’t you?”
“She’s my partner.” He snapped coldly and Glory got the hint to leave him. He didn’t mean for it to sound as hostile as it did but the insinuation wasn’t missed on him and he wasn’t in the mood for joking around.
Soft on her…
The words made him grimace as he pulled the cigarette from behind his ear. Her name shone through the cloud of smoke as he ignited it, accompanied by her smiling face burned in his mind’s eye.
Once more he felt that now familiar dread turn his blood to ice as he thought of never seeing it in front of him again.
So what if he cared about her? Why did that have to be such a big deal? He cared about all their agents. He’d feel the same if Glory, or Tom, or Fixer or any other agent went on a mission alone and…
Okay that was a lie that even he couldn’t swallow.
He’d be concerned if it were anyone else, sure, but this? It was different. He couldn’t get her out of his head since he’d found her gone this morning and it was even more frustrating that it was too late to go following her and he couldn’t shut it off like he could with everything else.
Of course he was worried, she was his partner.
Hell, she was even his friend, maybe the first person he’d ever really considered for the title in a really long time.
Maybe the first time since…
Why did he always think of her when he thought of Maya?
Deacon shook his head and looked around the Railroad, finally noticing his fellow agents desperately trying to act as if they weren’t all just staring at him with pity and intrigue.
They were all thinking the same thing as Glory and that realisation made his blood start to boil. It shouldn’t bother him, because it was irrelevant what people thought. None of today should have bothered him and... yet it did.
Trying to make it look as natural as possible, he made his way for the catacombs in the hopes that the screams of the ferals would be enough to drown out his thoughts of her.