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Fallout

Part 4

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3

Pairing: Jay Mills x female reader

Words: 7.6k

Warnings: Rated E, 18+ ONLY. Swearing. Anger issues. Nudity. Masturbation (male). Dry(?) humping. Dom/sub dynamics. Unprotected intercourse. Anal play. Anal sex. Spit as lube. Degradation. Watersports/golden shower.

Summary: Jay continues to battle his feelings as your stay drags out, doing everything in his power to prove to you and himself that there is nothing between you, only to have his methods intensify everything.

A/N: Right. This one is full of delicious filth and I'm taking advantage of the fact that this story doesn't get many eyes to write some fairly kinky stuff, but it also includes a lot of development between the two of them so I think it's a well-balanced chapter! I really had a great time writing this part and continue to be so excited and in love with this story, so please enjoy and let me know what you think!

There is also no moodboard for this chapter because all it consists of is smut so...yeah. But there's a treat below the cut 😉

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Adrenaline pulsed through Jay's veins furiously, similar to how it did when he was about to step into the ring, and in the short distance it took to get to his room that felt like an eternity, a play-by-play of what you two had just done in the kitchen flashed through his mind; the vivid imagery causing his hands to shake and the sweat he had worked up to drip down his back. He knew calm wouldn't come easily to him after that, and after slamming the door behind him, he leaned against it and breathed out as slow an exhale as he could and ran his good hand over his hair, half of him tempted to go do it all again while the other half urged him to try to sleep.

He was exhausted - both mentally and physically - and with the morning quickly approaching and his mind and body buzzing, he knew it would be impossible to let any of it go enough for him to fall asleep. He was an early-riser anyway, used to waking up before the sun to go for his five mile run before he trained, and even in the absence of any legitimate daylight due to the storm, his body was so regimented that it couldn't be tricked into believing otherwise.

With a sigh, Jay sat on the edge of his bed and looked out the window, seeing the snow continue to accumulate heavily, letting him know he wouldn't be getting you out of here any time soon. He swung his legs onto the mattress and laid down, staring up at the ceiling before closing his eyes, only to open them again after a minute and sit back up, his restlessness increasing with each passing second.

Getting down on the floor, Jay supported himself on his toes and right hand with his injured one secured behind his lower back and began repetition after repetition of push-ups in a desperation to move his body enough to quiet his mind. He should've known better than to think it would work, only imagining your body wedged between his and the carpet as he continued to lower himself down and back up again, and he finally stopped when his right arm gave out and forced him to sit back on his knees with a frustrated growl.

"Fuck!"

He wiped the beads of sweat that hung on his nose and chin with his hand, able to smell your scent clinging to his skin as he did which only made him feel more unhinged and anxious to have more of you.

Bringing himself quickly to his feet, he shoved his right hand down his pants to roughly adjust himself in hopes his rejuvenated erection would go away, but even the brief contact of his own hand on it brought back the memory of your touch, and he knew it wouldn't go left ignored.

With another curse under his breath, he tore his track pants down to his knees and took hold of his hard cock as he stepped out of the legs that were pooled around his ankles, gripping himself hard enough to begin to satisfy some of his needs.

Remnants of you remained on his shaft and in his pubes, the sight of it making him throb even more and forcing him to work harder, his teeth clenching together furiously as he gave in to every thought of you. He hated how much he wanted you, how much you had gotten under his skin and broke him down enough to succumb to what he had tried to prevent and knew he would go after again, and the way you seemed to enjoy his vile treatment of you wasn't helping either.

Remembering the looks that crossed your face and the way your lips curled into a smile when he called you names and held your throat had him reeling all over again, and he wondered if you were thinking about him again, too.

Accepting that he was far past the point of stopping what he had started and without wasting time in fussing over the best way to get the job done, Jay brought his palm up to his mouth and spit into it twice, providing enough lubrication to do what he needed to.

He felt desperate, needing to relieve this want that seemed to keep growing, hoping that as he emptied his load he would also be getting rid of these unnecessary feelings toward you along with it. He massaged his wet palm over his head and down his shaft, coating himself thoroughly, praying that the next person's spit all over him would be yours. The thought of kissing your parted lips that spilled moans of pleasure provided by him was getting him close, and now the imagery of them sealed in an 'o' around his cock had him bucking into his hand wildly, his thumb rubbing over his leaking head just like yours had not long ago.

His hand moved faster as his thoughts continued to encourage him, the sound of his name falling off your tongue something he knew he wanted to hear again, the feel of your body accepting his so well something he wanted to push the limits on; the possibility of fucking you slowly and lovingly a prohibited act he had instated himself that he so badly wanted to break the rules of.

He opened his hand and spit into it again, needing a little more lubrication to keep up with his movements, and tucking his bottom lip between his teeth to stifle his groans, he jerked himself with a steady force, imagining your hot mouth wrapped around his dick, bobbing up and down on his length and looking up at him innocently as you gagged on him.

Having already seen you enjoy his taste from the sample he had given you made him want to make you swallow all of it, pumping his cum down your throat regardless if you could manage it all, the vision of you taking every last drop of him as he spurted into your mouth with drool leaking from your lips and tears running down your cheeks sending him over the edge, a slew of broken curses tearing past his gritted teeth as he finished in his hand.

You would be fooling yourself if you thought sleep was likely to grace you now after all that had happened, every fibre of you super-charged and making you feel as if you had just run a marathon, the effects of Jay and his wonderfully brutal treatment of you lingering on your skin like electricity.

Needing to busy yourself to distract from all the persistent thoughts running through your mind, you rummaged through the cupboards and fridge to scrounge up what could be made into a half-decent breakfast, settling on made-from-scratch blueberry pancakes and bacon.

It was difficult to tell if you were even hungry, the feeling in your stomach one that mimicked it, but you knew was likely caused by an enduring sort of anxiousness and a very different type of hunger, and your lack of sleep made you want to sate it even more. Assuming Jay would be hungry when he reappeared from sleeping or whatever else he was doing in his room, you kept on with your task, idly flipping each pancake in the frying pan like you were on autopilot.

Without even having to look, you knew Jay had entered the kitchen, your body responding to his presence with the hair on the back of your neck standing on end and an ache increasing between your legs, and you glimpsed over your shoulder at him, a smile tugging at your lips.

He walked up behind you, making a point to cage your body in as he reached around you for a piece of bacon, his eye contact holding you in place while holding evidence of so much going through his mind. He was still half-naked, his track pants hanging loosely on his hips as he walked over to the island, showcasing his body that was sculpted like a work of art. Having to tear your eyes away from his torso, you swallowed thickly and tried to set your focus back on making breakfast, smiling to yourself that you weren't one to judge given you were still only clad in his hoodie, shimmying your bare legs together to provide enough friction between them to remind you of the slight soreness caused by him earlier.

The day crept on into the afternoon without missing a beat in the slightly awkward tension that hung in the air between you, both of you remaining quiet until you couldn't stand the silence anymore.

"This storm isn't letting up, is it?" It was less a question, and more an ice-breaker, hoping to gain some conversation if only on account of the weather, but all you got in response was a raise of his eyebrows and a slow nod, and you bit the nail on your thumb out of frustration and unease. His standoffish approach toward you had you wondering if he actually held ill-will for you or if it was a game to work you up, like the more he kept you at an arms-length, the more you wanted to throw yourself at him, and he fucking knew it.

You raked your fingers along your scalp, feeling ready to tear the strands out of your head, and being more than exhausted with the situation and simply beyond tired, you stood and paced the room before heading into the kitchen.

It didn't feel like you - opening cupboards and shutting them with more force than you ever would normally - your impatience getting the better of you, your ironic and frantic search for the box of tea bags you had seen earlier that you needed to drink to help calm you sending you into a craze.

"What the fuck are you looking for?"

His voice barely registered through the ringing in your ears, and it wasn't until he was behind you repeating himself in a louder, more demanding tone that you turned to face him.

You went to move past him, wanting to open the cupboard door behind him in the last effort of your search, only to have your wrist grabbed to stop you before you even had the chance to reach for the handle.

"Stop," he ordered, calmly, the switch in demeanor between you fuelling your anger more.

You tried to tear your wrist from him, realizing it was his bad hand that was gripping you, making you stop your resistance before you caused anymore damage to him.

"What the fuck is your problem?" he asked, his brows knitting together as he searched your face with more concern than you expected.

"You're my fucking problem," you hissed, shoving his bare chest with your hand after he released it, watching how the shape of it reddened his pale chest ever so slightly. The way he made you feel was infuriating, and when he dared to smirk at your reasoning behind your behaviour, it only fueled it.

You heard him chuckle slightly as you finally made your way around him, focused on your goal of locating the tea, your heart hammering in your chest when he muttered, "You're unbelievable."

"I am?" you spat, finding a bravery you didn't know you had. "You're the one who's unbelievable, acting like a broody asshole who refuses help because he's been burned by shitty people."

Jay closed the distance between you, his plump lips turning into a snarl, and you held your breath in your lungs as you waited for his reaction.

"You've got me all figured out, eh?" He shifted on his feet, hovering over you enough to make you cast your eyes downward, only to land on the prominent bulge in his sweatpants. "Little miss nurse coming in to fix me, to play therapist as well as the healer," he held your chin in his fingers using his injured hand, and the smell of the ointment you had applied earlier was like a slap in the face.

He leaned closer to you, his breath hot on your cheek, "Don't fucking forget why you're here, or the reason you're still here, because you would've been gone a long time ago."

Releasing your face, he rubbed his good hand over his hair back and forth roughly, trying to regain composure after he let his own anger build, and with a long inhale that made his chest rise fully, he stared at you with a look that made your knees go weak.

Holding his eye contact for a moment, you swallowed and blinked, turning away from the game-like challenge you silently agreed to play with him and returned to your mission of making tea, your hand shaking as you reached for the box and pulled it off the shelf, praying he wasn't watching you closely enough to notice.

Pouring boiling water into the teapot, your mind filed through all the different emotions Jay had made you feel in the short span of knowing him, and as you watched the clear water turn muddy as the teabags became saturated in it, you thought how he did the exact same to your mind. No one had ever had such an affect on you, making you want to act on such primal needs, your composure and usual well-thought out way of going about things destroyed with something as simple as a look. Having been given a taste of him made you crave more, and you felt crazed in chasing the high of seeing what else you could get, and in turn you wanted to give him everything.

The hours ticked on into the night, the storm having settled enough that only a few flakes were falling from the sky at a time, but so much had accumulated that you knew the roads wouldn't be cleared for days still. A silence that was loaded with lingering looks continued on as the normal atmosphere, growing your frustration as well as Jay's.

You had fixed dinner while he showered, and as you sat eating, you silently assessed the condition of his wound as he rested his hand on the table beside his plate.

"How's it feeling?" you asked quietly.

Following your gaze, he turned his hand over and sighed, "Okay, I guess."

Placing your fork down on your plate, you stood and took a step over to where he sat on his stool, sliding his plate out of the way in order to bring his left hand close to you.

You found it funny how he never watched whatever you did to his hand, his eyes only ever glued to your face or somewhere on your body, making you swell with a poised confidence, his silent attention and appreciation of your beauty somehow louder than words.

Daring to push the boundaries, you slowly moved your right leg so it straddled his, holding your breath as you watched him do the same before his broad chest finally let it go and his throat moved as he swallowed thickly.

"What are you doing?" he asked, his tone somewhat unimpressed to match his expression, his eyebrows raising on his forehead.

"Dressing your hand…" you spoke as innocently as possible, leaning over to grab the disinfectant solution and tube of ointment sitting on the opposite side of the island.

He shook his head but didn't pull his hand away from you, sighing as you began carefully cleaning his slowly healing injury.

"It's looking a bit better," you whispered, scarcely focusing on your task and not how close your bare sex was to touching his thigh.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah."

You looked up at him through your lashes, seeing a mix of smugness and unbearable lust on his face, and you wondered if whatever he was thinking was what you were too. It felt like he was almost daring you to act on the intense hunger he brought out in you, watching you with a cockiness you knew was partially a disguise in the name of self-preservation, and even if it resulted in something loveless and brutal like earlier, you wanted to find out.

As if it was the most natural thing to do, you sat yourself onto his thigh and continued to work, doing your best to ignore the hiss and heavy exhale that escaped his lips, feeling the muscles of his leg tense and flex against you.

Closing your eyes briefly, you adjusted yourself enough to make friction, moaning quietly at the contact before forcing your fingers to move again.

After a few seconds, Jay glided his free hand up your naked thigh, reaching underneath his hoodie to hold onto your hip and press you down on him even more.

You let your fingers linger on his hand even though you had finished applying the ointment, your eyelids falling closed as you allowed him to move your body in back in forth motions, controlling the pace and pressure, relishing in the sound of his breathing and how it felt to be grinding on him like this.

"That feels good, doesn't it?" he muttered, his voice so deep it made his words almost sound like a growl.

You nodded and breathed a 'yes', continuing to rock yourself on his thigh, knowing you were smearing your slick and staining his gray pants with it but not caring.

"That's because you're nothing but a whore," he said slowly, like he enjoyed saying every word.

Basking in his degradation, you arched forward, angling yourself so your clit received more stimulation, and boldly, you trailed your hand up his arm, dancing your fingertips over his Mohawk tattoo and then onto his chest, feeling his pec tremor to your touch.

"You're looking to get fucked again, aren't you?"

A shiver ran down your spine in the hopes he would take you roughly and with heartless care again, and you pulled your lip between your teeth to stop your smile from spreading as you humped his leg with more enthusiasm.

"I asked you a fucking question," he spat, ceasing your movements with his hand while his bad one reached up to grip your chin.

You let your smile creep across your face when you opened your eyes to look at him, seeing a liveliness in his blue ones as he stared at you vehemently. They dropped down to your lips, and like he was in a brief trance of feeling something softer and more caring toward you, his thumb grazed over your bottom one, smoothing across and pulling on it enough to part it.

"What was it you said about it only happening once, Jay?" you asked, the humour clear in your voice that you knew would snap him out of whatever he was experiencing.

His face contorted, making your stomach flip with nerves, the lines around his eyes deepening while the ones around his mouth set taught as he clenched his teeth together hard.

"Shut the fuck up!" he barked. You jumped slightly even though you had been expecting that reaction, and you bit your lip again to disguise another smile rather than recoiling, shifting on his leg slightly to show him you liked everything he was doing.

In an attempt to bottle his growing rage, Jay stood abruptly, pushing you off of him carelessly, and paced the space between the kitchen island where you stood watching him and the sofa.

He was hard as a rock, his erection furiously straining against his track pants, the sight of him in such a state making your mouth water and causing even more arousal to rush between your legs.

"You're allowed to just fuck me, Jay," you began, your voice shaking slightly from the overwhelming lust and excitement coursing through you. "I'm not going anywhere any time soon and-"

He cut you off by stepping toward you, bracing his arms on either side of you to pin you against the countertop as you leaned back against it. The automatic act of breathing stopped altogether for you as he hovered in front of your face, his eyes searching all over your features for a decision as to what his next move was going to be, and for a second you could have sworn he was going to kiss you.

You knew he wouldn't though, so instead you ployed in order to get some of what you wanted, even if it couldn't be his lips on yours.

“Do what you want with me, Jay,” you whispered, your voice so heavy with lust that the sound of it instantly increased your arousal. It was bold to even continue saying his name, testing your luck and seeing how many times he would let you get away with it after his initial warning, your defiance making you feel powerful.

“Get this fucking thing off,” he ordered, grabbing at the edge of his hoodie that covered your upper half. Eagerly, you assisted him, whisking it over your head until you stood exposed before him, waiting for him to do as he pleased.

The emotion brewing in his eyes told you he wanted to kiss every single inch of you, that he wanted to taste and learn each part of you until he made you sing from every kind of pleasure he could provide, but you watched as he buried that once again and replaced it with a beautiful sort of rage you continued to seek.

Pressing his hand to your lower back, he pushed you forward in the direction of the sofa, his forceful guidance making your breathing quicken.

Your palms met the back of the couch harder than you thought, the power he had over you so definite and indisputable that you let out an involuntary gasp as you gripped the edge of the supple leather.

You glanced behind you to see Jay peeling his pants down his legs, his hard cock springing free, his jaw set tight as he stared you down while his intense breathing wracked through his chest in sharp waves.

Hinging at your hips and spreading your legs invitingly, you felt your slick string across where your slit parted, and you hoped Jay could see it glistening in the glowing light of the room.

"Fuck…" he muttered to himself, clearly noticing how ready you were for him, his subtle praising making you swell with satisfaction.

Jay lined up behind you, his groin resting flush to your ass, and you watched as he took hold of his cock and guided it inside you, his face contorting with pleasure that he kept trying to hate.

You wanted to watch him fuck you, but the sensation of having him seated deeply inside you already had your eyelids fluttering shut, and when he dragged himself back out and pushed inside you fully again, you faced forward as his first couple of blows made you hit the back of the couch.

"Oh my god!" you cried, trying your best to stick your ass out more to meet his hips each time they plowed forward, the simple task proving difficult as your body simply wanted to be still and obediently accept everything he gave you.

It was all too much, every brutal thrust tipping you closer to the edge, the head of his cock slamming perfectly into that sweet spot that made broken whines and incoherent accolades strung together with curses fall from your mouth.

Jay tried so hard to focus on carelessly fucking you, hoping that if he managed to wreck you one more time, it would maybe satisfy you enough until you could leave, but the more he drove his cock in and out of you and watched your creamy slick spill out and coat it, the more he knew he wouldn't have had enough either.

It took everything in him not to smooth his hands over the gentle curves of your hips and up the dip of your back, choosing to grip tighter on your ass and spread your cheeks apart roughly instead, his eyes closing so he wouldn't be tempted to slow his pace and prolong this selfish indulgence.

He should've known better than for that to work, your sultry voice repeating his name as he built you up to near your climax forcing his eyes open again to torture him with the sight of your beautiful body rocking in front of him, and he clenched his teeth together tightly in order to not lean down and press his lips on your back and neck.

"Jay…" you mewled, "I'm so close."

Nearly losing it there over the way you looked over your shoulder at him, he proceeded to hammer into you, feeling you tighten around his girth, your eyes clouded with lust that made you look even more beautiful and innocent as you took him so well.

Determined to ruin you, he kept up his tempo, administering back blows so hard the couch began to move despite usually being secure on the plush carpet beneath it, and he became even more mesmerized by you.

Your eyes closed, gently squeezing so the corners of them wrinkled, your mouth parted and smearing across the leather in a swaying motion due to his thrusts, your body taking his harsh movements and converting them to ones that were flowing, calm and languid, and his heart clenched in his chest as the sound of you whimpering and pleading for him to give you more echoed in his ears.

"You better...fucking come…you fucking slut!" he growled, his false impatience covering up his pure enjoyment as he became desperate to feel you fall apart around him.

His cruel words encouraged you and made you flourish, and when he saw you let your arm fall between your legs to rub your clit, Jay spit onto your ass and spread it around your puckered hole with his thumb, lubricating it enough to press it inside right as you let go.

Your whole body tensed and shuddered, pausing your own movements as you let his carry you through such a blinding high, soaking him and squeezing him and nearly making him come undone at the same time.

As soon as your loud cries had quieted, he pulled out of you and pressed the tip of his cock into your ass, only achieving a couple of inches before he exploded, and removing himself from you again, he watched his hot, milky spend leak out of you while the rest shot out onto your cheeks and wet cunt.

Jay's breaths wracked his entire body, working hard to calm himself from the fury of emotions that battled in him, feeling a cold trail of sweat run down his back while he admired your dewy skin and how good it looked being covered in his cum again.

Your head hung between your arms that still held onto the back of the couch, your forehead leaning against it, until eventually you stood upright, turning to look at him while you took a deep breath and tried to get a read on him.

He wasn't giving anything up, though, having given away too much already, and he turned and stepped away, bracing his arms against the island with his jaw set tensely again.

Not entirely sure what to do or say now, you at least knew you needed to shower, and slowly, keeping your eyes on him until you no longer could, you tread on light feet to the bathroom.

You could feel his stare as soon as you had stopped looking at him, and pausing a moment in the doorway, you glanced behind you to meet his gaze before walking inside and flicking on the light, leaving the door open in what you prayed he knew was an invitation.

You turned on the taps and adjusted them before leaving the water to heat up, checking out the mess Jay had made of you in the mirror as you waited, the evidence left behind making the after effects of it all seem blissfully more intense.

Testing the water with your hand, you stepped in under the stream, holding your breath as you let it rain down on your face for as long as you could before exhaling slowly.

It was only a couple of minutes before Jay joined you, his large frame making the already cramped shower feel even smaller, and wanting him to be near you as much as he could be, you stayed close to the stream so he would need to stand up against you to get under it.

He said nothing, just stared at you as he dipped his head beneath the falling water to soak his hair, his eyes closing and letting you admire how much longer his eyelashes seemed when they were wet as they laid against his cheeks.

It seemed so normal, showering together, both of you lathering and rinsing shampoo out of your hair in turn, enjoying the comfortable silence and how relaxing it was.

You had finished washing the soap off of you but lingered as long as you could, not wanting to end this subtly intimate moment with Jay while accidentally brushing up against him whenever you moved, your slippery skin grazing and gliding along his implicitly.

Jay could feel it building up again inside of him, the strong desire to feel himself encased by you becoming terrifyingly undeniable, and the way you kept dangling yourself in front of him like bait was testing him like few things had before. As much as he tried, he couldn't stop himself from letting his hands skim your body with any opportunity that presented itself, the warmth and softness of this whole act contrasting heavily with the silent rage growing within him.

It made him angry to see himself slipping away so easily, like his heart didn't care to let itself fall into your hands without fear, his body acting on its own to get as much of you as it could whether or not his mind agreed. He knew he was being an asshole, but in feeling it was his last defense in protecting himself from getting hurt, he pressed on with it.

You were about to step out, your body scrubbed clean of him, but he grabbed your arm to stop you, pulling you in so you stood with your back against the wall.

"Come back here," he demanded gently, his tone disguising the more intense emotions brewing beneath the surface.

The amusement he felt at seeing the confused look on your face briefly took over everything else he was feeling, and before he let any affection he held toward you stop him, he braced his arms on either side of your face and moved his close enough he could have kissed you.

He watched as your eyes flickered from his eyes down to his lips and you held the breath you had sucked in, waiting, only he wasn't going to give you what you wanted no matter how heavenly you looked.

Jay smirked and chuckled darkly, his next move one he had decided on from the moment he saw you rinsing any remaining evidence of him down the drain, and a fresh wave of needing to keep and claim you stirred in him at the thought of it.

It felt cruel and animalistic, but the desire to have you as his was too overwhelming to deny, and still on the path of repressing all the tender ways he thought about you, he carried out his barbaric display of affection.

Closing his eyes briefly, he sighed as he began to release, pissing freely on you, opening them again to see his stream coat your legs and waist in a defiling and reckless act of devotion.

Watching it was almost half as satisfying as watching the expression on your face change, your naivety in thinking he was going to be caring twisting into shock as you registered that something warmer than the water started to trickle down your body and onto your feet.

He moaned and exhaled while your mouth hung open and you glanced down to confirm what was clear you couldn't believe was happening actually was, and although you seemed disgusted and angry, pushing on his chest to move him away from you, Jay could see a glimmer in your eyes that told him you were turned on by it.

Not budging from your poor attempt at making him, Jay watched as you accepted what had happened, remaining in place and not trying to get away from him again, your chest heaving as you let out a deep breath.

Feeling high off the adrenaline this sparked in him, he smirked at you and then spit at your feet before backing away enough to admire how your body responded by your nipples hardening and your breathing quickening, your pulse noticeably thrumming in the side of your neck.

“What are you doing, marking your territory?” you asked in a challenging tone, although your voice shook slightly.

"It's what you deserve…stupid bitch that you are."

You swallowed thickly, goosebumps erupting on your wet, pissed-on skin, his foul and shaming words making your pussy clench and ache for him again.

Somehow in your shock and stupor, you found your voice, "Do you really think that about me? Or are you just-"

"Don't fucking tell me what I think!" he roared, the noise echoing off the shower walls.

You shimmied your legs slightly, your body instinctively reacting to his harshness by pushing your arousal to the forefront, and you swallowed the lump in your throat while you blinked, the eye contact he was holding making you want to falter.

You cursed all the ways your body gave you away, letting him know that everything he was doing was making you fall deeper into something he refused to give you, his next words a spiteful way to keep you holding on by a thread.

"And don't pretend like you don't love being treated like a fucking whore."

Closing your eyes slowly, you basked in his false hate, melting to the way this degradation added to the control he was claiming over you.

It was hard to recognize yourself with how submissive you found you wanted to be, the desire to obey him until he revealed the loving side you knew was there making you willing to take anything from him, but mustering clarity to briefly ignore the drug-like effect he had on you, you took a deep breath and spoke with as much surety as possible.

"And what if I do? Would you do the opposite and show me some kind of care and affection? Kiss me, even?"

He scowled. "Don't play games."

"I’m not."

You looked at him as honestly as you could, hoping your sincerity would shine through and he would believe that as much as you were admittingly throwing yourself at him, you wouldn't toy with his heart or burn him like he had been before.

His cheeks flinched as he clenched his teeth together tightly, clearly trying to figure out how he felt, but he remained in place and even returned his hands to rest on the shower tiles on either side of you, leaning slightly closer.

You could feel your chest tighten and your heart skip a beat when he rested his forehead against yours, your eyes closing when you felt his fingertips trail down your arm slowly until he reached your hand, lacing them together.

"I'll be yours, Jay," you whispered, giving him the confirmation needed to relax and trust, his breath fanning over your lips as he sighed out.

His forehead rubbed against yours as he shook his head slightly while he breathed deeply again, a low grumble resounding through him as he started to grind his hips against yours, his hand squeezing yours tightly in the grip of his fingers.

You moaned whenever the head of his cock nudged your over-sensitive clit, your body jolting in response but welcoming it all the same, adjusting your legs so he rested in your folds where you slid along his length in a languid tempo.

His nose grazed over the tip of yours and over to your cheek, the contact feeling as meaningful as a kiss would, sharing the same breath as you slowly began to work each other up.

While still holding your hand, Jay took his injured one and slid it under your thigh, lifting your leg to hook it around his waist, giving him access to probe inside you just enough to tease you.

Your available hand smoothed up his back, feeling his muscles contract with each movement, your nails digging into the thick flesh on his shoulders each time he threatened to enter you fully.

Peeling his face away from yours, he held you in place with a sobering gaze, his eye contact weighted with so much emotion, and slowly drove inside you inch by inch.

Resting his nose on your cheek, he began to thrust, his pace purposeful and sensual, each drag out and back in carefully calculated to slowly pick you apart.

As good as it felt, you still cursed him for torturing you, his mouth continuously hovering close to yours but never landing on you, making you pray to a god you didn't believe in that he finally would. You held your breath any time his lips ghosted over your skin, his nose grazing on your cheek and neck like he was hovering over all the places he wanted to impress his kiss on, close enough you swear you could feel it.

Slow, rolling motions continued to carry you through to your nearing high, building you up gradually and seemingly lovingly, his intensity equalling that of the other times he had fucked you, only this time more fervid and compassionate.

Water ran off his full lips and onto yours as his mouth hung open in front of you, his breaths growing more laboured as he expelled his energy into the arduous pace, knowing that fighting the temptation to kiss you was adding to his efforts.

Your offer to be his repeated in his mind the whole time, seeming to ground him rather than make him run from it, and he fucked you like you already were, every caress on your body and drag inside your tight walls another claim over you.

The way your fingers ran along the nape of his neck and raked up through his hair had him basking in your silent praise, feeling you clench and squeeze him with every deep push in an act of worship and appreciation of him.

He built you up slowly, bringing you to the brink and letting you linger there, coaxing you closer to the edge but only giving you enough to make you seek your release by moving with him harder.

"Jay, please…" you whined, gripping onto him in a plea for mercy, your head falling back to be supported by the wall, allowing him a view of your face as pleasure took over your features.

He intensified his thrusts, plowing into you even slower, but with more force, feeling you tense as your orgasm began to tear through you, and he angled himself so the coarse hairs on his groin rubbed against your clit to help prolong it.

He would've come with you if he wasn't so enthralled in watching you, constantly amazed by how stunning you were when being torn apart by him, the way your entire body responded to him making him quickly become addicted to it.

Releasing your hand, he brought his up to your face, his thumb gently smoothing over your bottom lip as he began to lean in toward you while continuing the slow grinding of his hips on yours, the pull he felt to kiss you becoming too much to deny any longer.

As if the universe was torturing him, the water began to feel cold, the hot water having run out in the extended amount of time you had been in there, waking him up slightly from the haze he seemed to be under.

You fluttered around him, the aftershocks of your climax rippling out in waves, prompting him to increase his pace to a far more aggressive one, the escalation of your cries spurring him on.

"You…are…fucking…mine!" he hissed through gritted teeth, the sound of your wet bodies slapping together mixing in with his panting breaths and your desperate whimpering.

He rammed into you furiously, and you held onto him frantically as you let him use you to finish, his usual unpredictable actions leaving you unsure how he was planning to, every nerve in you feeling alive and electrified from his possessive words.

His mouth fell against your shoulder, his spit smearing on your skin as he pounded you relentlessly, and feeling him surge inside of you as he began to cum, another orgasm of your own ripped through you violently.

Before you even had the chance to come down from your high, Jay was pulling out of you, the sensation of him slipping from your tingling walls with his thick, hot cum spilling from you making you whine, the unsurprising act of him abandoning you stinging more than it previously had.

Without looking at you, he ran his hand over his face and exited the shower, letting the door slam shut behind him to make you jump, leaving you standing wet and cold as you watched him grab a towel and storm out of the bathroom.

Jay couldn't hate himself more if he tried.

Leaving pools of water in his path as he stalked down the hallway to his bedroom, he urged himself to turn around and go back, the guilt he felt at leaving you like that when he knew he cared so much about you making him realize how cowardly and pathetic he was.

He slammed the door so hard it shook the walls and cursed loudly, pacing while he tried to calm his breathing, the temptation he felt to punch the wall or tear apart the room increasing with each passing second.

He didn't realize he had been clenching his fists so tightly until the sharp pain in his left one seemed to register in his brain, looking down to see a deep red beginning to spill from the gash even through the darkness of his room. Exhaling a shaky breath, Jay sat on his bed and pressed the towel still wrapped around his waist onto the cut, trying to stop his racing thoughts and ache in his heart as much as the bleeding.

Jay knew if you left that he would be able to clear his head and move on, focusing on healing and resuming his training so he could fight again, but at the same time he prayed for the sky to open up again to prevent you from leaving.

He was stupid for treating you how he had, the point he was trying to make by acting this way completely useless, comparing what he felt for you to that bullshit with Liza like comparing night and day.

Before he could manage to fuck up anything else, Jay stood and crossed the space between his bed and the door in a fury, rushing into the hallway with only one thing on his mind.

You shut off the taps, blinking furiously to rid the tears mixing with drops of water that ran down your face, the most defeated and helpless feeling coursing through you.

It was clear that Jay would never accept that you had feelings for him or learn to trust you, his hurt too powerful that it blocked out anything good that he felt he didn't deserve.

Grabbing a towel from the stack of them on a rack beside the shower, you wrapped it around yourself in search of some sort of comfort and took a deep breath, needing to get control of your emotions and this situation.

It was temporary, you reminded yourself. The storm that was the reason for you being stuck here was settling, and the wound on Jay's hand that brought you here in the first place was healing, so you would be going home as soon as the roads reopened.

The thought of returning to work was welcoming, looking forward to the distraction it would provide as you let time fade everything you were feeling, and you knew after being closed because of the storm that the clinic would be busier than ever. Maybe you would even reach out to Deb tomorrow to see if she would be willing to come pick you up from here, not wanting to ask Jay for more than he's already given you and wanting to spare you both from the awkward and most likely silent ride back to where your car was left stranded.

You walked out of the bathroom and tread quietly down the hallway, pausing when you passed Jay's room. You had heard the door slam, so it didn't come as a surprise to see it still closed, but part of you had hoped it was open again, acting as a symbol of amendment or olive branch. Hesitating for only a moment while you debated knocking, you thought better of it and forced yourself away, going to the room you were staying in and shutting the door behind you. A sad smile crept on your lips as the significance of closing the door was like closing the door on whatever this was, and you prayed for strength to carry you through the rest of your time here.

Even with convincing yourself of the finality of it, you couldn't seem to drown the persistent swell of your heart whenever you thought of him, and as much as you told yourself that you were okay with this being nothing more than sex, you knew there was so much more to it.

"Fuck…" you muttered, not thinking twice before turning the doorknob and pulling open the door, your heart leaping into your throat the moment you looked out down the hallway.

---

Taglist:

@sotwk @dailydragon08 @sunnys-day @thedreadandthefugitivemind @glassgulls @littlenosoul @glitterypirateduck @momia2910 @maggotzombie @rmwarn90 @paintlavillered @stealfromthedevil @kmc1989 @ourlonelymountain @itspdameronthings @theesirenteller

I went ahead and tagged everyone I have written down for my Charlie/Will Miller taglist so my apologies if you're not interested in being tagged in this and I will happily add or remove anyone as they wish!

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