Discover Top Posts Tagged with #dear momma

Although I feel calm and at peace, I feel this deep, deep sadness. Melancholy. I wondered if you wondered if I remembered your birthday today. I did. I thought about you all day. I’m sure you brushed it off and told everyone it was just another day and that it wasn’t anything special. I hope you are truly happy with everything. I sung happy birthday out loud into the night sky. I hope it catches you in your dreams. I love you and I always will.

#momma #dear momma #crying into the void

We honor the life of Ms. #AfeniShakur. Did You Know: She acted as her own criminal defense attorney after being accused of taking part in numerous bombings as a member of #TheBlackPantherParty. #DearMomma #RIPAfeniShakur (Correction: Afeni Shakur's Birthday is January 10th)

#afeni shakur #rip afeni shakur #dear momma #tupac shakur #DaughtersAndSisters

I had a dream earlier that my mom missed me and we hugged and told each other how much we love the other.

#i cant help but feel that her feelings and love made its way to my dreams #because its the holjday season and she might be thinking of me more #god i miss her #i miss her silliness #i miss when she laughed hard #i miss her love #i miss her cooking #momma #crying into the void #dear momma

#Dear Momma #Winzyaks #Rap #Tribute #dear mama #Mom #youtube #life

First Day

Dear mum

Today I started my first day of a job that I was weirdly excited for. It’s really easy and I don’t do much, but its graveyard and pretty good pay. The first person I worked with was a really nice woman who finished crocheting a hat about 2-3 hours into the shift and it made me think of you.

I had so much anxiety leading up to starting but it was better then I expected. It helped that earlier in the day I had talked to aunt D. My lease is up soon and because my rents going up it it’s been stressing me out so much. But I talked to her about it and she said the rent over there is the cheapest in the state and she’s okay with me living with her for a bit until I can find a place and manage to survive on my own without having to kill myself working two jobs.

I’m sad that it means leaving some of my friends I’m really close with, but I think this will be really good for me. Getting away from my sperm donor, farther then just a different house but to the whole other side of the state, will be so good for me. I’ll be close to Nana and that will be really stressful but it will be worth getting away from him.

I’m going to miss the little ones so fucking much it already hurts and I still have two and a half months until I move. I’ve decided that I’m not going to tell them until after I’ve moved. I’m going to try and see them on her birthday since she’s almost two already?!?! {Where in tf did two years go??} Then once I’m moved and at aunties I’m going to tell them so they can’t make me feel like shit about it or tell me that I can’t do it because they don’t believe that I can do anything.

Aunt F is not doing good, I don’t know if you can feel it or not but she’s going to be seeing you soon. They say she doesn’t have long. They’re not sure she’s going to make it to great grandmas birthday in two months. I got to see her though over New Years. She thought the last time she saw me was when you were still alive. She kept thinking that I was Aunt D’s daughter, so we think that she thought she was you. She’s so happy though for how much pain she’s in. She still brings a smile to everyone’s face as soon as she speaks. The entire time she was asking us not to leave and to stay with her longer. It was so hard to leave knowing that might have been the last time I’d ever see or speak to her. I’m going to miss her so much, I regret not spending enough time with her over the years. I didn’t know how to have relationships with the people in my family cause the one with sperm donor and his ex’s were always so fucking hard, I’m still not sure but I’m getting better.

I’ve been seeing grandma and papa more since they’re only an hour away now which has been so nice. I love having a relationship with them after years of only talking to them for like 2 minutes every couple years. I even spent Thanksgiving and Christmas with them. It was so weird spending the holidays with family that didn’t make me hate myself for just existing, it was so fucking nice.

It’s been awhile since I’ve written to you but hopefully this will give the motivation to do it more to help work out issues and to feel like I’m keeping you updated. I know I don’t do it enough and normally only when I’m really really upset and don’t know where to turn. Now it’s time to get in the habit of telling you whenever I have a lot of emotions about things and not just the really negative/depressed ones.

I love you so much and I hope you’re doing good and flying high in fields of Sunflowers.

P.S. If you see Aunt F before I talk to her again tell her how much I love her and am happy she’s no longer in so much pain.

#letters to the grave #letters #dear momma #mom #fields of sunflowers #sunflowers #iloveyou

Stream and Save Dear Momma, Dear Poppa - Distributed by DistroKid

Dear Momma, Dear Poppa is a personal song I made for my Mom and Dad that have passed on. The song introduces them to their 4th grandchild CJ my youngest son who is two-years-old.

The beat was made by a awesome producer and friend from New Jersey Names Friends With Beats. Look him up on Instagram and follow him he has some dope projects coming up.

We are talking about doing an EP together so Stay Tuned. Stream on your favorite platform and please add it to your playlist. Thank you and Blessings all. PKSP aka Patrick.