#demon merchant

[guardianoftheotherside]

Imagine that one day you heard about thieves in Luwr museum and jokelingly guessing with Strife who could be the ones who did it.

Imagine one week later being on a mission with one of horsemen and meeting Vulgrim. You notice that the stolen thinks strangely got into demonic mervhant’s position.

[sophi-s]

Vulgrim!

A bit late (12:19 AM xD) but he's ready. Look at this fabulous jerk :D

Now imagine the owner of the talisman he holds (Vulgrim "found" it and absolutely refuses to just give it up, especially after being threatened by the aforementioned owner, it's up to you who this is) aggressively rummaging through their pouches in search of something "of appropriate value for exchange" and silently plotting murder XDDD

Vulgrim's like: "I may smile all the time but I have a mean fucking backhand and I'm not afraid to use it on your ugly ass :)"

[guardianoftheotherside]

Y/N:* go for a walk*

Vulgrim: Greetings human

[guardianoftheotherside]

War: You have my sword

Fury: And my whip

Strife: And my pistols

Death: And my scythe. Vulgrim, we need to talk about your cleptomania

[guardianoftheotherside]

Vulgrim: Greetings horsemen. Do you want to know the secret?

Death: No.

Death: * smell something*

Death: What is that smell?

Vulgrim: The secret is that Strife and Y/N set kitchen on fire.

[guardianoftheotherside]

Vulgrim: Why are you sleeping like a Dracula?

Death: What?

Vulgrim: I came to steal one of your souls and saw you sleeping straight with your arms crossed.

Death: You have like a lot of souls , demon merchant

Vulgrim: Whatever you say, Nosferatu

[guardianoftheotherside]

What Darksiders would give you for your Birthday?

(bc, today is mine 🎂)

War: He would give you weapon to protect youreself, while awkwardly whishing you happy birthday. Today he is more focused to making you safe than anything, so be ready to extra hard training. But at the end of a day he will give you hug and tell you that you did great today and how happy he is to be your friend.

Death: He did not understand the concept of celebrating birthday( you are just one year closer to your death whats wrong with you?!- his words not mine), but he will give you book he think you may like and will be nicer to you.

Strife: Oh boy. He will give you hug, something he found( probably this horse toy), throw you a party and best wishes. You are his friend and he may sure to show it to you.

Fury: She will wish you happy birthday in „ leave me alone already, i Don’t care” tone, but later you find weapon with note” Don’t think lot of it” and will be watching you while you are showing it to everyone. Don’t be mad at her, you are her first friend and she have No idea how to act.

Azrael: He will wish you happy birthday while giving you warmest hug and book you wished to read. At the end of the day while you are watching sunset he tell you how great is to know you and how he is happy to being your friend.

Vulgrim: This demon merchant will not try to convince you to sell your soul to him in this special day, but give you 50% discount to his goods. Busines is busines, sorry.

Samael: He would give you the finest neklace he posses and wishing you happy birthday. He never say it out loud, but he grow fond to you.

Draven: He is not sure what to do. He is not sure what modern humans are doing to celebrate friend’s birthday, so he will wish you happy birthday, give you your around castle( while making sure nothing disturb your time) and later made a little show off while training.

[guardianoftheotherside]

Azrael: Money absolutely does not buy happines.

Vulgrim: You probably spending it wrong, give it to me and I’ll show you how it’s done.