My Brother is Dead — Amelia Shepherd x fem!reader
Summary: F!reader is close with Meredith, but when Amelia and Meredith get into a screaming match, it’s Amelia who the reader goes to comfort over the loss of Derek.
Warnings: angst, Sadness, I think that’s it??.
Amelia, what’s up?” Your tone is dead serious, as you pull Amy into an on call room after walking in on a screaming match between her and Mer. You lock the door behind you.
“What do you mean? Everything is good,” she tosses you a fake smile, her eyes darting around the room, trying to figure something out in her head, to grasp something in her mind.
“No, it’s not. I can tell something is up with you,”
“Oh really?” Amelia chuckles sarcastically, and starts pacing the room, “how could you tell? Was it because I was out there screaming at your best friend? Why would that be wrong, you know she hates me. To think of it,” she looks at me for a few seconds before returning to her pacing, “why aren’t you off comforting her right now? Shouldn’t you be with her, discussing how I’m just a burden to both of you? Because I can’t think of any other reason that Meredith wouldn’t call me when she found out about Derek,” Amelia turns to face you and crossed her arms, looking you dead in the eye, “because that’s just me, always me; Amelia the burden, the failure, the only Shepherd who’s not worth anything. The person who everyone ends up leaving. That’s just who I am, I guess.”
You can see her expression falter, now. You can see the years of hurt in the way her shoulders move to cave into herself, in the way fingers pick at the seams of her leather jacket (you were all about to head home). You step toward her, just a foot away now.
“Amelia.” You put my hands on her shoulders, slowly sliding them down her arms. “I’m not with Meredith because I know she’ll be okay. She’ll go find Alex, and tell him more than she would ever tell me. And because I know she would say something bad about you, and I couldn’t handle that,” Amelia just shakes her head, looking down, “I couldn’t handle it because you are not, and never have been, a burden to me. I can’t believe that Meredith didn’t call anyone for Derek. You’re his sister. You’re her sister. I can’t imagine or understand how much that hurts.”
You let your hands drop from her arms. When Amelia looks up at you again, her eyes are bright and full of tears, her teeth gritted, and it looks like her entire will is going towards just keeping her body from not falling apart. For this one moment, in this one way, she is more fragile than You have ever seen.
“My brother died,” she sounds fierce, but You know better by now. This part is not fierce, or poetic, or beautiful. It is only painful. A sob rocks Amelia’s body, and You extend your arms to hug her, but she just grabs on to you; latching her hands onto your elbows, using your arms as a support to hold her body up as she continues to sob. “My brother is dead.”
You remove your arms from her grip, wrapping your arms around her instead. You try to move over to sit on one of the beds, but Amelia’s feet are planted. Instead, You just wrap your arms more tightly around her waist, moving the other one to her shoulders, pulling her even closer to you,
