YWFTW#2 and the Positivity Sandwich (long post)
The scene begins with optimism. Ed is rightly showing off his fish framed inside a combat narrative reinforcing his developing confidence. Ed’s body language - ‘behold!’ - also signifies self-assurance. Meanwhile, Stede’s positive nonverbal conversation cues are exquisite - his eye contact, facial expressions, and little gasps of delight build Ed’s self esteem further, and reinforce his absolute delight in Ed’s tale. Stede shows further interest by a follow-up question, ‘What are your plans for it?’ before positively reinforcing the rather obvious answer with, ‘I like that, good plan’.
We get verbal mirroring from Ed next which reinforces the pair’s intimacy - ‘I like that shirt.’ Stede’s positive praise allows Ed a way in to flirt, turning Stede’s language back around as a compliment. And Stede plays along, with a verbal callback, ‘This new thing?’, because they are in tune with knowing which memory is playing in both their minds as they stand in the moonlight.
Ed continues to pull at that memory telling Stede, ‘You wear fine things well’, cementing the phrase in their couples lexicon. The repeating of it here, this time by Ed, and Stede’s clear understanding of the significance, reinforces where they both pinpoint the beginnings of the romantic stirrings of their relationship.
We then get the kiss that never happened the first time, and it’s beautiful. But we then get a tone shift as we realise they are not quite on the same page.
Stede deepens the kiss whilst Ed stiffens and pulls away. This is the beginning of a more cautious part of their conversation. After so much positive body language, and lexical mirroring and callback, their language become disjointed and unsettled.
There are a number of overlapping and unfinished sentences:
Ed: Can we take it ssssslow? Stede: Yeah. Sorry. I didn’t… I wasn’t thinking… Ed: No, it’s alright…. I just need to… um…[clears throat] Stede: No, I know.
Ed: [Big sigh]
Broken sentences and hedging don’t seem to be going anywhere as they both scramble for mental purchase. Ed also uses a number of nonverbal fillers to signify discomfort - throat clearing, sighing, long pauses. And ‘Can we take it slow?’ is so tentatively asked it signifies Ed’s continued struggle with agency.
The next part of the scene subverts much of the positive features of the first section. Ed again uses a phrase from their couples lexicon, as he did with YWFTW to initiate the kiss, but this time to slow Stede down. He tells him they’re both ‘whim-prone’ as Stede said, and this time Stede’s nonverbal conversational cues become negative. There is no eye contact, and his face falls at his words being used to block their relationship progress, and he remains completely silent as Ed says ‘sometimes it’s nice just to be patient and wait’.
In a further subversion, Ed latches on to the fish he’s holding, not now as a tale of triumph, but one of caution. We’ve seen time and again Ed thinks best in metaphor, and he has clearly learned something about himself on the boat today with Fang. But Ed still isn’t fully clear what his needs are. When Stede asks if Ed is ‘the fish’, Ed says ‘We’re the fish…’ suggesting he still has doubts over whether Stede wants to be caught. But then he descends into hedging again: ‘I guess. Maybe. I think…’. Ed still lacks confidence and clarity in expressing what is causing him to hesitate, he just knows what he feels.
And Stede is amazing because he doesn’t push any further. The veil of sorrow covering his face lifts into a ‘Huh.. okay…’ And this is where we get the positivity sandwich because Stede now takes the conversation and finds a way to lead it back again, layering the cautious part of their conversation between two positive interactions.
Stede takes Ed’s hand tentatively asking ‘Is this alright?’, but he allows Ed the agency of completing the handhold fully. Stede then waits to see what Ed will do next, and smiles with such affection as he admires Stede’s hand and place his own on top, adjusting the position with care. Now at what point this becomes a game is unclear, but I think Stede now putting his hand on top certainly indicates playfulness. Neither speaks, but Stede’s nonverbal cues are again exquisitely reassuring as Ed now cottons on to what is happening by raising a finger; Stede mirrors with a thumb, and Ed tilts his head and bests him.
It’s symbolic of the conversation at the start when they mirrored and synced up. The game shows Ed he’s been heard and Stede isn’t upset. It’s an example of how much they can be in tune with each other in the right circumstances (‘We can be a lighthouse’). And Stede’s pitch-perfect ‘You won’ with all its layers of meaning reinforces the positivity with which the interaction concludes after the wobbly middle, allowing them to walk away together happily in relaxed conversation.
