#disgustingbitch

[irelatewith]

I would crawl, cry and scream to get to you.

If i was under my flesh i would tear it apart to get to you.

Id die for you. Id live for you.

But ive been in hell and i see no difference.

Its not your fault. But it aint mine either.

How is this any different from begging. Begging attention. Begging love. I am not a dog.

I am not a pet.

I shouldnt be crying because i dont get you. We should be talking.

I dont wanna be around you trying to solve things. I dont wanna be around asking for a kiss. A hug. A word. A WORD.

I know you love silence. I know we live together. I know. I know i should spend time alone and like it. I do. I do.

Ive been doing that my whole life. I thought you got it. You dont.

I dont need you, i just want you in my life.

Im working hard on this and i know my own struggles make it hard to see that, but im trying so hard. I am. Its not fair.

I dont deserve this.

Im asking for the minimum.

And feeling that youll get angry at me if only you read this. I dont deserve this.

I am not a piece of trash so stop acting like i am.

[darilina]

I know I do terrible things to my body. Just recently, I was throwing up and suddenly saw something red. I remembered that I didn't eat anything red. Probably even then it was worth understanding that it was time to be treated more thoroughly. But I got scared, calmed down, and scored. I eat 60 or more laxatives. I stuff myself with antidepressants and all sorts of drugstore drugs. Sometimes I look up at the sky and say to God, " I'm sorry I'm doing this to myself, but you're the one who won't let me be beautiful. So suck it." Don't think badly. I'm religious and believe in God. I just have so much happened that I am already 100 times convinced that for some reason only disgusting bitches continue to live, and good people die. So, who am I?