š§āāļøāØ 05: The Doās and Donāts of Being Friends with Stephen Strange: A Survival Guide by Serena Stark āØš§āāļø Pt. 1
Alright, Iām here to help all of you navigate the wild experience that is being friends with Stephen Cedric Vincent Strange, the guy who can open portals to alternate dimensions but still canāt pronounce "penguin" correctly. (Looking at you, Doc. š)
ā DOās
Do accept that heās basically a walking thesaurus.
When Stephen opens his mouth, prepare to hear words that make you feel dumb. Words like āepistemology,ā āprestidigitation,ā and āprobabilistic thaumaturgy.ā If you donāt know what half of those mean, donāt worry. Just nod and smile, and occasionally drop āThatās fascinating, Docā like you're actually listening.
Do accept that he will judge your life choices.
You know how some people are passive-aggressive? Well, Stephen is aggressively passive. Heāll ācasuallyā mention that you could probably fix your whole life with a little āfocusā and ādisciplineā while giving you a judgmental side-eye. Thanks, Doc, Iām already working on it. Maybe donāt tell him about your Netflix bingeāheāll probably lecture you on āwasting timeā or something equally annoying.
Do appreciate His Style.
Stephen's wardrobe is 90% cloaks, and honestly, he pulls it off. The man can be the most powerful sorcerer in the multiverse and still manage to look like heās one step away from a Hogwarts graduation ceremony. Compliment his cloak. Always. Itās the only thing keeping his ego from imploding, and letās face it, that thing is his most prized possession.
Do enjoy his random facts about everything.
No, seriously. Stephen Strange is basically a walking encyclopedia, but way more intense. Heāll casually mention facts about the history of magical realms, obscure creatures, or the properties of enchanted mushrooms, and youāll wonder, āHow does he know so much about mushrooms?!ā But hey, it's better than the usual small talk, right? Just nod and say, "That's interesting, Doc," even if youāre still wondering about the mushroom thing.
Do pretend you understand magic (for his egoās sake).
When Strange starts talking about spells or mystical rituals, just toss in a āYeah, totally. That makes sense.ā Maybe even throw in a āI think I can feel the magic now,ā and watch him glow with pride. Deep down, we both know you have no idea what the hell heās talking about, but this is the best form of flattery. No one tell him I still use Google to figure out half of what he says.
Do accept that you will never, ever win an argument.
Stephen is the king of "I told you so" moments. Heās been alive for centuries (or at least it feels that way), so he will outwit you, out-reason you, and out-snark you into oblivion. Donāt even bother trying to argue your point. Your best bet is just to nod and say, āYeah, sure, Doc, you were right,ā even if you know you werenāt wrong. Itās easier this way.
Do be ready to call him out when heās wrong.
Even a Sorcerer has to take accountability. You might not have magical powers, but youāve got that Stark wit and some serious confidence, so when he pulls a "Stephen Strange" momentālike when he tries to explain why he is always rightādonāt hesitate to put him in his place. Youāll gain mad respect.
Do prepare for spontaneous philosophical debates about existence.
Somehow, Stephen will always find a way to turn your casual conversation into a deep dive about the nature of reality, the universe, and how everything is interconnectedāeven the way your coffee tastes. Just roll with it. You didnāt plan on spending the next 45 minutes contemplating the meaning of life while looking at a cup of coffee, but here we are.
Do embrace the unexpected trips to the Sanctum Sanctorum.
Being friends with Stephen means you might end up in the Sanctum Sanctorum at odd hours. And not just the āletās grab some coffee and chatā kind of visitāoh no, sometimes youāll be swept into dimension-bending, reality-altering escapades with absolutely zero notice.
Do learn the art of nodding and pretending you understand the mystic mumbo-jumbo.
Letās face it, half the time youāre going to be completely out of your depth when Stephen talks about magic, alternate dimensions, or cosmic phenomena. But donāt panicājust nod, repeat a key word you might have understood, and when in doubt, throw in an āI knew that!ā Stephen will never know that you have no idea whatās going on. After all, heās a wizard, not a mind reader. Probably.
Do accept that he's secretly proud of you (sometimes).
Deep down, Stephen is actually quite proud of you when you manage to hold your own in a conversation about magical chaos or dimensional anomalies. Itās rare to get an actual compliment, but when you do, itās like a momentous occasion. Think of it as winning a gold medal in a very niche event. But if he ever says, āYou did well,ā itās like the highest form of praise heāll give you, and youāll feel like youāve just achieved enlightenment.
Do remind him to eat... occasionally.
As busy as he is, Stephen somehow forgets to eat. So, when you're hanging out, throw a snack his way and remind him that the human body still needs foodāno matter how much magic heās conjuring. If youāre lucky, heāll mutter something about ātaking care of himself,ā but hey, at least he ate.
DON'Ts
