i’d give you up for me.
Fedya dolokhov x reader
word count: idek its long
pronouns: she/her
warnings: some mentions of alcohol (not much though!)
genre: fluff!!!!
authors note: I FINALLY FINISHED IT!!! AFTER MONTHS AND MONTHS OF IT I DID IT!! IT TOOK ME SO LONG AND IM SO HAPPY I COULD FINALLY SHARE IT!! hope its not too much honestly- it gives me massive Y/N vibes (like Y/N Y/N vibes, maybe not, maybe i’m just being irrational). this is kinda based off a part of w&p
it was a lousy night, for the both of them. for Y/N and dolokhov. neither knew each other though. it was a long night of waltz’s and dances, who thought a ball would be this draining? they had both socialised with every person, or so they thought. it seemed that every member of russian society was at this ball.
this was Y/N’s first ball, her first night out. she had picked out a gorgeous ball gown, one that complimented her features.
this was dolokhov’s seven hundredth ball, or thats what it felt like. he had been to so many, he had just lost count. he scanned his eyes around the room, he sat at a table in the corner with a few friends, their conversation had died. everyone at that table was tired and drunk. but dolokhov was just slightly tipsy, unlike him. he held a champagne glass between two fingers and stared down the room. his eyes set to the rostov table, full of young girls. there was: sonya, natasha, marya, vera, and a new unfamiliar face. quite a gorgeous face, actually. she was enchanting, he found himself lost in her charming ways. she hadn’t even noticed him, well he was in a dimly lit corner of the room. he watched her face and body move, the way her lips would turn up into a smile then a laugh. he had been staring at her for 10 minutes and had already memorised the motions of her face.
his mind had set on it. he was going to go over there and make him known by her. but how?
a simple hello?
ah yes…
say hello to marya D.
he made his way out of his seat and over to the person in the question.
‘marya dmitrievna, what a pleasure to see you here!’ dolokhov outspoke.
‘fyodor ivanovich dolokhov. good to see you here.’ marya sternly spoke.
‘fyodor ivanovich dolokhov? thats the assassin you were talking about the other day!’ natasha pointed out.
‘thats me.’ fedya acknowledged.
‘assassin?’ Y/N asked, with a face of light fear.
‘yes, Y/N. be careful.’ sonya replied.
dolokhov didn’t know wether to be offended by this or to take this a compliment. fedya wants people to see him this way, but not Y/N.
‘Y/N? thats a beautiful name.’ fedya said out of the blue.
‘dont flirt with her, goddamn.’ vera rolled her eyes, like a little Marya Dmitrievna.
‘i shall be leaving now, have an amazing night.’ dolokhov didn’t want to say anymore, but he didn’t get the acknowledgment from Y/N that he wanted. he had to think hard now, how could he get Y/N?
he sighed while walking back, this was hard. getting a women had always been a breeze, simply throwing a look their way would normally melt them into a million pieces.
but this is what he already loved about Y/N, she was different from the rest, not willing to give herself forward to any man thats she sees.
…
the night went on, washing away to almost nothing. dolokhov’s table was silent and the energy was low. fedya trailed his eyes over to the beloved table again, everyone was gone except Y/N. marya was speaking to old friends, natasha had gone off with anatole, sonya went off with Nikolay, vera had gone off to old friends. maybe this could be his chance…
he found himself already walking over to Y/N, who had her head resting in the palms of her hands, simply examining the glass in front of her.
‘Y/N?’
‘fyodor.’ her voice so crystal and clear, dolokhov could hardly handle it.
‘i did come over to speak to you earlier, if you didn’t realise. its a shame the people you were with i guess..’ dolokhov realised that he may have just made this awkward already.
‘i sensed that… take a seat, im alone, its boring.’ Y/N requested.
‘im sure you are much less boring then my table over there, nobody has spoken in 3 hours.’ the music coming from the instruments were still blasting, nobody would be able to hear them.
‘wheres your table?’ Y/N asked.
fedya pointed to the table of men similar to him with their heads buried in the table, or taking another shot of vodka.
‘ah i see.’ Y/N realised the kind of person that he is.
‘sorry about earlier, what’s your name again?’ fedya asked, trying to restart things.
‘Y/N alexandrovna rostova.’
‘gorgeous name, you probably know mine, but you can call me fedya.’
‘fedya has a nice tone to it, it sounds nice.’
‘thank you.’
‘marya told me about your assassin title, i was quite scared of you. but to be fair, you seem friendly.’ Y/N beamed.
fedya took a seat, he sat next to her. he felt constricted, she was so breathtaking, he couldn’t breathe. ‘you seem like a unique person, Y/N. you’re the first person i’ve been rather friendly around.’ dolokhov felt this was soon to say, but he felt bold around her.
Y/N blushed slightly, she quickly changed the topic. ‘lovely ball!’ that was a lie.
‘yeah, it would be if it wasn’t so draining.’ dolokhov chuckled.
‘true, but you don’t seem draining. you seem pleasant.’
‘glad to see my affections are returned, Y/N.’
dolokhov gently took her hand and kissed the back of it. Y/N tried to keep a straight face, but the feeling of him against her hand made her nerves tingle and her face lift into a small smile, covered in a light blush.
‘shut up.’ Y/N chuckled, her head was overwhelmed with emotions, this was the only thing that could come out. her face was heating up, she felt her cheeks heating up and glowing.
dolokhov was shocked, but he chuckled at how quick she was with it.
their laughter was soon to be abruptly stopped when they felt the presence of marya behind them. Y/N looked over her shoulder and saw the glaring eyes scanning both of them.
‘Y/N, a word?’ marya said calmly but enough to leave goosebumps. she was scary, but as she says - ‘i look out for the ones i love’.
maybe thats true.
marya took her to a quiet corner away from the party.
‘Y/N i thought you knew better. you realise what kind of danger you are putting onto yourself?’
‘maybe i do, but you don’t have control over who i do and dont speak to.’ Y/N knew she shouldn’t fall so quickly, but he was different.
‘please Y/N. for your reputation.’ marya knew she couldn’t control her, but she could at least point her in the right direction?
Y/N didnt know what else to say.
‘come on Y/N, lets go home.’ marya said quietly.
Y/N wanted to say goodbye to fedya, but she’ll have to find another way. maybe not today, but sometime soon.
…
after days of longing, she knew she shouldn’t have fallen like this. but it is what it is, love at first sight. thats what the kids call it. it’ll be something to tell her children - wait. she can’t be thinking of her own future with him yet, SHES ONLY HAD ONE CONVERSATION! she fell onto her bed and sighed dramatically. she hugged a pillow close to her, her thoughts were confusing and she was ready to give herself up for someone she barely knew. just to break her thoughts - sonya walked in.
‘Y/N!’ sonya gleamed with the bright smile everyone loved.
‘Sonya!’ Y/N hugged her, as if she hadn’t seen her for days. their friendship was good and strong.
‘theres a letter for you!’ sonya said teasingly, as if she knew what it was. even though she hadn’t a clue.
‘who from?’ Y/N asked suspiciously.
‘no clue! i’ll leave you to open it, dear cousin.’ sonya left the letter on her nightstand.
it was a simple envelope with a red wax seal, it was adressed
‘Y/N Rostova’ in curly cursive writing, not anything she recognised. she thought of all the possible people it could be, but none of them matched up with this handwriting. she carefully and slowly opened it, as if she was expecting something to jump out. as she carefully unfolded it, she made her way to the door to lock it - to make sure nobody could see or find out what she was about to read.
‘Dearest, Y/N.
I managed to find out where i could write to you to! through nikolay (gosh he is awesome). i wanted to say, i thoroughly enjoyed talking to you at the ball a few nights ago. i haven’t stopped thinking about you. in all honesty, confessing feelings over letter is easier than in person. you’re a lovely person, and i’d love to know you better. even though we know eachother minimally - i’d love to take the chance of courting you. or writing to you. your choice! you lighted up me and my feelings, i can tell you’re someone i get along with.
let me know your thoughts.
all my wishes and prayers,
Fyodor Ivanovich Dolokhov.’
oh no.
panic.
her heart skipped a dozen beats, and she found herself swooning and almost crying at the feelings she just felt. he was almost perfect. practically perfect! he was perfect to her! instantly she got her pen & paper and began to frantically write her reply.
…
‘Y/N, my love!’
‘yes, dear?’
‘come here a sec!’
Y/N made her way into fedya’s study. it was moments like these where she was glad she ever went to that ball, he meant everything to her.
‘yes, dear?’ Y/N said with a gleaming smile.
‘i found all our old letters!’ fedya put the glasses onto his head and patted the space next to him. she made her way over and looked down at the pile of letters he had on his desk.
‘theres the first one, theres the one where we planned the elopement, theres the one inviting you to meet my parents-‘ fedya went on and pointed at different letters and what they were. Y/N looked up at him, he looked proud and happy. she smiled softly, it was amazing to see how far they came. she had met her soulmate and she couldn’t ask for anything more.
