I honestly never realized how true cliches were. I feel incredibly lost within myself. I don’t know who I was, I don’t know if that was even who i truly was or who I wanted to be. And I have no idea who I am now, because bits of me are good and bits of me can be cruel sometimes, but like, I feel like the mean me isn’t me, like it’s something that’s doing it. Maybe that’s nothing, maybe it is just me, maybe I just change feelings drastically, or I don’t know. I know my morals though, and I know how much I respect myself and others, so I suppose that’s good. But I don’t know if it’s because I think that’s what I should be, but maybe that’s not so bad either? Because I know one way is wrong so i think i should be this good way, is that being who you are or is that being who you think you should be? How do i distinguish which is which? I don’t know where the fuck I want to go, and I don’t have a lot of time, I’ve missed so much school and now they’re offering to pay for my summer school to get it all done, but like I want to go to this college that doesnt require a diploma, which feels more right, but I don’t know maybe I want the easy way out? Maybe it isn’t a gut instinct, maybe it’s just the laziness. It’s like, I can’t interpret which feeling goes to which, I can’t tell if this is truly me or something I’m made to believe. Idk okay I’m drunk and I’m done ranting. although probably not, because I have no one to talk to right now lol.