#dont rebug

[bambaiyya]

exfoliator: keep on face for 5-7 minutes me after keeping it on for 15 mins: me keeps it on for another 10 mins

[gowns]

hm you know hitler technically wasn’t elected, he was up for the 1932 presidential election and had about 38% of the vote and hindenburg, a conservative monarchist running as independent, was elected with 50% of the vote. hindenburg didn’t like hitler but he was pressured into giving him a position in his cabinet because the nazis were gaining power and had a majority in the reichstag (abridged; there was a lot of political manuevering between 1929-1933). so hitler was appointed chancellor and from there, seized power.

of course it’s difficult to make direct comparisons with nazi germany, because the weimar republic, the SA, germany’s exact economic and global position after WWI, that’s all fairly unique to nazi germany. but you don’t have to do an exact mapping of history onto the current moment. i think it’s enough to see the reverberations, the ripples that warn of things to come.

trump’s executive orders this week are scary. his cabinet appointees are scary. his propaganda machine is really scary. different political groups and leaders in 1920s-30s germany thought that perhaps they could negotiate with hitler and the nazi party. there was a lot of in-fighting among leftists over which policy, exactly, should they be focusing on... people tried to go through official channels to change things. we are not up against mere legislature, we are up against ideology.

reading the descriptions of the camps is chilling to me. not because i’m afraid it might happen, but because it describes the current condition of our prisons: the frequent use of solitary confinement, hard labor, frequent harassment and assault. the only difference is that the people in prisons have “committed crime,” but there’s a strong disparity in which populations get sent to prison, get solitary, etc.; one which i fear would grow even more stark in a country ruled by fear of the Other, the desperate hope to “unify” in the face of the Other.

hitler talked often of “unity,” how he was going to make germany strong again. the way to do that was to get rid of the “bad elements.” this is what trump and the far right promise to us over and over again. we have to take them at their word. it’s not unprecedented.

[xxedgybitchxx]

people always left. inevitably they got bored of me and stopped humoring me and left me in the dirt. or once they no longer needed what they were getting from me, they left. by freshman year i had accepted that i was going to be alone forever. but then you showed up, and while others came and left you stayed. you stayed and i thought you would forever. and maybe you were here longer than anyone else, but it looks like you don't need me anymore. go and replace me just like everyone else did. don't keep stringing me along, just hurt me once and get it over with. im sorry i wasnt enough for you.

[xxedgybitchxx]

gods im always so conflicted over my body. i wanna get in shape and get buff but i can't seperate that from wanting to lose weight and be skinny. i try to be as body positive as possible and when I see other people out there of any shape or size being their best self? im all for it!!!!! go for it!!!! you do you ad you're amazing!!!!!! but gods i just can't apply that to myself. I've gained almost 50 pounds in the last year and I've gone up another shirt size. im not even that big!!!!! if you looked at me you'd assume I'm a skinny bitch but my stomach hangs down amd I'm almost 200 fuckin pounds and i hate it so much i want it GONE i want the extra fat gone and i want it gone now but i hate that i feel like that. why cant i be comfortable with myself? why do i want to start eating less just so i can get rid of all this fucking fat? and sometimes if i over eat i want to start throwing up again but no that's not good i cant do that but i dont want to gain anymore weight i dont want to

[pastelsapphy]

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[saintgulik]

nothin says a good time like some extremely self destructive behavior

[pastelsapphy]

I’m stressing and dying a little rn bc I’m in one of those moods where I want to do anything and everything I wanna draw all my OC’s I wanna draw my friend’s OC’s I wanna work on poses I wanna learn to animate I wanna turn the last dnd session into a comic I wanna finish planning my dnd I wanna pick up my writing again I wanna start doing Let’s Plays and dust off most of my steam library but I know this mood is gonna die within the week and I’ll spend months doing nothing before it happens again and I won’t make any progress in anything and I wanna lie down and cry for a while

[pastelsapphy]

tonight on panicking about my future: i literally wrote down every single major my school offers and crossed out the ones I’d rather die than do for the rest of my life and it left me with. art. maybe language and cooking. maybe. so uh. should I just enter minimum wage retail hell now?