#dorcas muse

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⋆៹ ✩۪۟۟≭  Friday Musings, June 12, 2022 -- Dorcas Meadowes

With the daily post one day came a thick, cream envelope. the letter was not addressed to any one particular recipient, the only writing reading in loopy, black ink: From the Desk of A. Sallow. upon opening the letter, residents were required strongly encouraged to fill in the attached questionnaire, only to return the completed questionnaire to the mailbox in front of town hall.

Dorcas stared at the envelope, sitting down on her couch next to her roommate Bill Potts, who had gotten an identical letter. In fact, everyone in their house had gotten one, and Dorcas presumed everyone in the city had as well. It was... weird, to say the least. Armes seemed a little too preoccupied with the private doings of the citizens of Sallow Hills, and they didn’t like how strongly the attached note told them to turn it in. Regardless though, Dorcas moved to the kitchen table and got to work on filling it out.

Restate your name and living situation.

Dorcas Meadowes. I’m a nurse at the hospital here, and I live in a townhouse with three roommates.

How long have you been in Sallow Hills?

I’ve been here about five months.

How well would you say you are handling your homesickness?

I’m handling it well. I miss my partner. That’s the worst part. But besides missing my partner, I’d say the homesickness has been at a minimum. I came from a war, so the general atmosphere of where I used to live wasn’t exactly the best.

Would you ever want to leave?

Maybe. If Marlene ever shows up, I’m happy to stay here forever. Sallow has all kinds of cool things that my old world didn’t have that I really enjoy. I really like 2022 and how I’m free to be myself, out and proud as a bisexual demiwoman. 

How would you describe your satisfaction with the town itself?

I’m very satisfied with this town. 

Any other comments, questions, or other tidbits you would like to add?

What’s the purpose of this questionaire?

--

Dorcas looked over their answers, a frown on their face. They weren’t sure if turning this in was a good idea. It was a nice reflection activity, but it made her uncomfortable to think about Armes reading it. She pursed her lips before folding it up and taking it to her room, where she stuck it in a drawer instead of mailing it back to Armes.

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“Missing Her”

A/N: hi friends! Today is the day that myself and a friend of mine who ship Dorcas and Marlene McKinnon together on Instagram marked as their anniversary, so I wanted to write a reflection of how Dorcas would be feeling today in Sallow Hills. Please note that if somebody comes to play Marlene in the future that I’m perfectly fine for this moment to be struck from the record or modified if said mun would like it so.

· · ┈─────── ⋆៹ ✩۪۟۟≭ ───────┈ · ·

March 3, 2022. Dorcas looked at her phone, the date staring up at her like some sort of insidious villain. 

March 3rd used to be the happiest day of her life. March 3, 1977. Marlene had been acting strange all week, distant, like something was building up within her, ready to burst. Dorcas had been aching, worried that for some reason her best friend didn’t like her anymore, worried that she was angry with her for some unknown reason.

And then Dorcas had found her, outside in the courtyard, smoking a cigarette in the dark. It was then that Dorcas confronted her, asking what was wrong, asking why she was distant, scolding her for taking up smoking again. And Marlene had looked so defeated, until the words spilled out of Dor’s mouth by accident, jumping to try to grab the cigarette out of her high held grip.

“Damn’t Marl! You’re worrying me, you have to stop! I love you, and I hate it!”

She’d stopped, staring in shock, the cigarette dropping from her hand. Dorcas said the words again “I love you. I’ve always loved you.” Marlene admitted her love in return, and they were suddenly kissing, vowing to never let each other go.

And now Dorcas was here, in Sallow Hills, all alone.

Well, not all alone. She had Remus, she had Lily (a friendship reforged, even without Lily’s memories). She even had new friends, like her roommate Bill Potts. But without Marlene, she still felt so alone. A part of her was missing. The blonde hair she always got her hands lost in, the red lips that kissed her so tenderly. The person that had always made up the other half of her, ever since they had become best friends at the age of 11.

She knew it was unprofessional, but she’d called off work today. Dorcas couldn’t bare the thought of going into work, putting on a happy face and helping people without Marlene to come home to. Not today. Not on March 3rd.

Dor’s eyes were filled with tears as she lay in bed, staring at the ceiling. It ached, not being able to share a bed with Marlene, having to go to sleep alone every night. She was grateful for Bill and their other roommates; Dor wasn’t sure what she would do if she had to live entirely by herself. She’d never lived alone in her life. It has been straight from her mum’s to the Gryffindor dorm to Marlene and her’s flat. But she still had to go to sleep alone, and nothing could replace the gorgeous sound of Marlene’s laughter, or the mumbles in the night as she spoke in her sleep.

Dorcas looked back at her phone, staring at the date, wishing she had a picture to stare at instead. Part of the pain of being ripped away from her life included being ripped away with only the clothes on her back and her wand in her pocket.

No pictures of Marlene.

Their flat had been covered in photographs. Photos of them together, photos of their friends, photos of the lake at Hogwarts and the dorm room they grew up in. Dorcas loved photography, and she’d gotten herself a new camera in Sallow Hills, one much fancier than her camera from back home (and surprisingly cheaper), but it wasn’t the same without Marlene as her model, laughing and grinning at the camera, or posing so mock seriously that Dorcas couldn’t help but laugh.

Dorcas couldn’t bear to hang up any photographs in her new room, not when there weren’t any photographs of Marlene to hang up. She had decorations, even a rainbow flag hung above her bed. But no photographs, even though her camera sat on her vanity table, filled with photos she’d taken in Sallow Hills, pictures of her roommates, pictures of Lily and Remus, pictures of her new friends she’d met at the White Rabbit’s weekly LGBT meeting.

Most days, Dorcas was able to cope. Missing Marlene was a constant underneath all her moods, but she clung onto the hope that Marlene would show up one day, and she distracted herself with projects and her friends.

But today there was no distracting herself. There was only mourning, grief, and the fear that she would never see Marlene again.

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The Fool - what is your muse’s first ever memory? (Dorcas)

Dorcas's first ever memory is of her mother, whispering to her about magic when she was three. Her father was a muggle, and her mother hid it from him. Dorcas was told that her magic was beautiful and wonderful, but that she should try to restrain it in front of her father. Given that children's magic is unpredictable, this didn't exactly work. Two years later her parents were divorced.

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The Chariot - does your muse have trouble fitting within a certain ‘norm’? how do they differ? (for Dorcas)

Dorcas fits in well with others--for the most part. The thing that set her apart was her sexuality. She knew from a young age she was attracted to girls, and that this was not allowed. She tried to bury it down, and did get genuine crushes on boys, but the pendulum of her heart always swayed more toward the feminine. Her sexuality was well accepted by her friends, but she was always nervous telling people the truth about it in the outside world.

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The Magician - does your muse have any unique abilities or powers? How do they feel about being powerful? (for all 3!)

Dorcas -- given her status as a witch, Dorcas certainly has unique abilities and powers. Her specialty is in healing and defensive magic. She feels good about being powerful, because the more powerful you are the better you can protect your friends.

Jenny -- Jenny has the unique ability to regenerate and to live for a very long time. They don't really think about themself as powerful per say, even though they are. To Jenny it's simply a benefit of their genetic makeup as a Time Lord.

Catra -- Catra doesn't have any magical powers, but xe're quick on xir feet and intelligent. Xe really like power. It makes xem feel worthy, and xe think that it fills up that empty hole inside xem. It doesn't really, but Catra thinks it does for a long time.

[enxgmatics]

@therecklessmuses