I divorce post about dorira so much that I feel I need to explain what makes them good
Ira and Dorian are both black sheep, before the inquisition as well as inside of it. They’ve both had pressure placed upon them since they were young and always felt like they’ve fallen short of everyone’s expectations. They’re both magical prodigies with passions in unexplored fields (whatever the time travel bullshit is/rift magic). More generally, they’re both intellectually curious people.
Ira thinks Dorian’s non-conformity is very brave, going against what others expect of you and choosing your own happiness. Dorian thinks Ira’s earnestness is very brave, he’s just constantly floored by how ira is just “himself” without any pretence. Ira thinks Dorian is funny (even if it sometimes takes him a minute to understand what the joke is). Dorian is entranced by Ira’s freakisms. Just an endless source of fascination.
Ira doesn’t ask a lot of Dorian. by that I mean he doesn’t expect words of affirmation or anything else that’d be too much, too soon for Dorian. Dorian’s presence is enough. Dorian is Ira’s confident, taking comfort in the knowledge that whatever is said will stay between them. (Dorian is not giving him like heartfelt advice. It is more like he gives Ira permission to talk shit about how being the herald sucks and everyone is mean and we’re all totally fucked.)
Intimacy wise, Ira is enthusiastic and shamelessly very upfront with what he wants which is refreshing for Dorian who is used to Tevinter men being weird. Ira wants to chew on Dorian’s biceps. He has probably told dorian, with eyes glazed over with lust, that he wishes he could nestle inside his arm pits #MyFreak ❤️
share your favorite moments for each of your canon romances in all the dragon age games
tagged by @thewardenisonthecase months and months ago 😭
ffion & morrigan: A lot of their relationship orbits around just sharing space quietly, little moments like Morrigan reading while Ffion braids her hair. Okay actually that said. I do really love the moment where Ffion gives Morrigan the golden mirror and she's so touched by it but surely he expects something from her? Surely there's some ulterior motive? but Ffion so earnestly says he is gifting it to her because he likes her and believes she deserves it. He saw it and thought of that story she had told him (That was months ago, he remembered that?). And quietly he adds that "If it doesn't offend you, it is only right a lady such as yourself should get to see her own beauty". Morrigan thanks him and he nods and wishes her goodnight. Leaving Morrigan with the dawning realisation that for all their shared cynicism and Ffion's standoffish posturing, he is at heart a romantic who may genuinely want to treat her well, if she lets him. <- what a terrifying thought!!
hawke & merrill/isabela/anders/fenris: look I could do an individual moment for each. but in truth, i do really like post-arishok battle after Hawke gets their shit rocked and is inches away from dying. All four LI having a "oh shit, he's going to die" moment alongside all their issues colliding into each other. Isabela's guilt over putting Hawke in this position, Fenris's guilt for setting up the duel and his fear that he won't get to clear things up with Hawke, Merrill using blood magic to keep Hawke alive (knowing that blood magic has become a sensitive topic post-all that remains), and Anders' rushing in to heal him only to find that healing isn't working (magesbane) and now all the pressure on him to sew Hawke's abdomen back together, all of the trauma from losing Karl simmering. I like this moment for two reasons 1. incredibly rare everyone working together moment (literally holding Hawke's pieces in place and fenris/anders' looking the other way w/ merrill's blood magic). 2. it's also a major turning point in all of the relationships, for better and for worse!
ira & dorian: oughgh. Balcony scene; Ira is exhausted, he's over stimulated and barely capable of words. When Dorian finds him, Ira just collapses in his arms. They do end up dancing but it's more so swaying while Dorian hums, rubbing Ira's back softly as Ira buries his head in Dorian's neck, using Dorian to ground himself. I don't have a big write-up on this, I think it's just a cute supportive moment.
mikhal & lucanis: ok. my fave moment is their joint "realisation moment". Their "oh no this is real" moment but it hitting them in inverse ways. For Mikhal, it's realising his attraction to Lucanis is more than just physical. For Lucanis it's being hit with attraction to another person for the first time in years. Leading up to this Mikhal has just written off whatever he is feeling for lucanis as purely sexual. Which is fine, because he's slept with friends before, it means nothing to him. It's just sex who cares. Meanwhile, Lucanis has been caught up in all the other shit he has going on to really process that his new best friend might be flirting with him, he flirts with everyone, that's just Rook. He cares deeply for Rook because Rook is his friend who saved his life. Simple.
Post-weisshaupt, Mikhal and Lucanis are sitting together in the kitchen late at night. Mikhal's drinking expired ale in an attempt to knock himself out, Lucanis is still in the dumps. They're going back and forth and Mikhal's doing impressions of Spite which makes Lucanis laugh hard. Mikhal's hit with a wave of adoration. But as Lucanis laughs he bumps the table, knocking over a cup and they both reach for it resulting in Mikhal grabbing Lucanis' wrist and they both just... freeze. Then Mikhal's like AH-I-think-that-ale-is-hitting, i'm-going-to-bed-goodnight-lucanis-bye. Mikhal lies in bed like "That was weird. Well anyway I just want to fuck him." <- guy who is about to fall asleep thinking about how nice it'd be to hold his friend's hand. Meanwhile Lucanis is still sitting at the kitchen table, head in hands with Spite yelling in his ear LUCANIS WHY IS YOUR PENIS DOING THAT??!?!
no pressure tagging @dellamortte @nox-ut-lux @dick-hardboiled @mageknife @cacturne !!
useful/fun character development questions for couples
12. How much independence do they prefer in a relationship—do they want to share their lives as much as possible with their partner, or do they prefer to mostly do their own thing and let their partner do their own thing?
Their respective struggles with communicating their needs regarding independence is like... the through-line for the relationship, its break-ups and make-ups.
Dorian, by virtue of his childhood, is independent to the point of hyper-independence. Dorian is terrified of intimacy, of getting attached and getting hurt. It takes a lottt of time and ira constantly insisting on showing up for him for dorian to begin to open up. Even then, I see dorian's convo about returning to tevinter and insisting on doing it by himself as an example of this hyper-independence. But it's also a test, surely this'll be the time Ira gives up on him because that's what dorian is used to. Only for ira to fail to see this and affirming Dorian's fears.
Ira swings from hyper independent to codependent. He has a lot of shame around feeling incompetent whilst also being paralysed by any decision. Initially, he doesn't need to be attached to the hip with dorian, but over the course of dai and ira's life spiralling, he does come to rely on dorian as an anchor. A consistent physical presence. He assumes dorian feels the same way so that's why he's shocked/shuts down when dorian says he's returning to tevinter. He sees dorian's need to prove himself in tevinter without ira's help as an insult. He feels stupid and childish, like "of course why would dorian need you there, what help would you be?". Naturally, Ira doesn't communicate this to him and instead just ruminates on it leading to their first break-up <3
It is a reoccurring issue that they only start to actually talk about directly during/post-vg. Dorian is archon and ira is determined to retire from the public eye but other than those small issues, they agree nothing is in the way of them being together <3333 Should they stay together? ah well. you know. um :) :p
13. What is their go-to for making a partner feel loved?
Dorian: physical affection, quality time
Ira: physical affection, compliments/praise
I said this in some other post but ira is compatible w/ dorian in that he's very direct/earnest with his affections. dorian is compatible w/ ira in that he'll take him out for a walk around skyhold's perimeters to talk about magical theory or bring food up to ira's room and act like they're out to dinner somewhere nice <- good fun for dorian but for ira it's peak romance
17. Under what circumstances would they want to be left alone by their partner?
When upset/vulnerable, dorian feels smothered by any kind of attention. He needs a moment to himself before he can talk about what's upsetting him or he lashes out. He's pretty good at apologising about this.
if ira is overwhelmed/overstimulated, he will up and leave. Sometimes, he has really specific needs around dorian's presence like he wants dorian there but wants dorian to do his own thing/"ignore" ira while he just sits in the corner.
There is also of course the whole elopement saga.
TLDR; few years post trespasser, dorian rescues him from chantry conservatorship and houses him in minrathous while ira slowly emerges from heavy disassociation. After a few years, ira starts "disappearing" for lengths of time to get back at dorian for refusing to tell him what happened during the time period he was disassociating. With that said, while it consciously starts as a direct fuck you to Dorian, it does become a way for ira to express autonomy. He was stuck in the inquisition for 10+ years constantly wishing he could just run away, and now, he can just run away without consequence*. After losing so much, he holds onto the secret of where he's going because it's something he gets to keep for himself <3
(*other than upsetting the people that care about him)
