A primal surge Atton could only describe as a roar grew as the Force unfurled inside of him, flooding his senses with light, awareness and life. All of this, but it was pure terror that gripped him. The memory of his first glimpse of the Force had been fresh on his mind, that assault of insight and retribution a Jedi determined to save him had shoved down his throat.
He relived it all as something like a sensory spectator as every closed door in his twisted hallway mind was flung open, but there were two important distinctions: this time he’d chosen this, and Tam was here. On the periphery of his panic he could feel her presence in a way that intimacy as a concept didn’t seem to cover. He wanted to drown in that feeling for a while, but there was too much of everything. Every good thing, every bad thing, every connection. The connection. Sweet Mother of Pazaak, the connection. Could he really do this? I take it back! Did he say that out loud? Maybe it was irrational but he gave in to the strong impulse to cradle his skull in his trembling hands to keep it from shattering.
Minutes, hours, eons. Eventually the chaos of his awakening subsided, but Atton didn’t sit up or open his eyes for a while after that. Then came her fingers brushing lightly through his sweat-damp hair. The contact made him shudder. He tried to quell the tears that steadfastly refused his direct order to cease at fucking once.
“Atton?”
“‘M okay,” he announced, though there was a lack of conviction he didn’t intend. He slowly sat up while wiping his cheeks. “Yeah. I wasn’t-.” His eyes went wide at first, then blinked rapidly as he tried to acclimate to his sharpened senses. “I’m fine.” She squeezed his hand and he almost cursed as a fresh tear rolled down his cheek. She must’ve picked up on it.
“It’s okay to cry,” she said gently. “And you really are fine, you know. You did great.” She smiled and tugged his hand toward her, leaned in a met him halfway for a kiss he found all too brief. He remained close to her, marveling at the amped up way his senses perceived her now.
“It’s been years and years since I cried like that,” he said quietly, almost absently as he studied her beautiful face. He found himself rebelling against the idea of ever getting used to this feeling. “All things considered, I guess it’s a small price to pay.” Her brows rose subtly as she nodded. “I’ll admit there was a minute there when I wasn’t sure, though.”
“You’re strong, Atton. I’ve got my work cut out for me if what just happened is any clue. That was quite a ride.” She held his gaze for a few silent moments. He wiped his face again, took a long breath, and assumed a playfully chiding tone.
“Alright, I’m gonna go on record and say that’s a severe understatement.” A smile eked its way out, ruining the charade. A beat later, they both laughed. He drank it all in, feeling that hope for the future she’d planted in his heart flare a little brighter. He shifted so that he was sitting beside her and she leaned into his shoulder. They were quiet for a while. She seemed to understand his silence as he processed what had happened. She understood a lot about him, but still it kept surprising him.
He had a million questions. There were parts of him that still weren’t sure about his decision - what it all meant. For now though, he decided to enjoy it.
“Uh, I wanna say thanks, Tam. For this. For everything.”
“Mhm, talk to me again in a week after we’ve been training and we’ll see if you’re still thanking me.” With that threat thrown, her lips curled into the most delicious smirk he’d ever seen. He smiled. She met him halfway for the kiss.
Training could wait a little while. Priorities were important, after all.
"Where are you?" Brian sing-songed as he tip-toed around the apartment. He checked the bedroom closet, pushing the hanging clothes aside and poking through the shoes, then closing the door and looking under the bed. "I'm going to find you, Tabs." He chuckled as he jumped into the bathroom and pulled back the shower curtain, sure that she'd be cowering behind it. Seeing nothing but an empty tub he turned and looked behind the door."No one eats my candy stash and gets out of here alive." He turned as he heard a faint giggle, grinning as he ran into the kitchen and pulled open the cabinet under the sink. Letting out a loud exasperated sigh at the empty space beneath he turned and headed towards the pantry closet. "Give yourself up now, and I might be convinced to lower the sentence." He called through the door, hearing a soft giggle coming from inside. A predatory grin spread over his face as he turned the handle.
