Chapter 3 of my Drarry fic posted in daily drabble (double drabble?) sized chapters 👻
Link to Chapter 1
Chapter 3: Past Midnight
With Draco Malfoy holed up in the bedroom across from his, Harry is on high alert. The blonde git never showed up for dinner, which Harry took great pains to cook, and now he’s partly mad, partly worried and wholly unable to sleep.
It’s past midnight and like any normal person suffering from lack of sleep, he decides to have a wank. His hand is down his pants and his cock halfway to full mast when the door slams open and Malfoy stumbles in.
Harry quickly pulls up the covers but Malfoy hasn't noticed. He’s not even looking at Harry, instead he blindly feels along the walls before slipping down and resting with his knees drawn up.
“Please ... don’t want to be kissed.” The words are barely audible in between gasps.
For a second, Harry thinks the word ‘kissed’ was supplied by his own wank-addled brain. “Errr …” he mumbles, feeling a mad urge to giggle.
Draco looks up. His eyes are swollen and bloodshot. His face, wet with tears. “Oh Merlin,” he cries. “They’ll send me to be kissed by Dem –” the last part of the sentence is swallowed up in a violent sob.
And really, it shouldn't have made Draco lose his mind. It shouldn't matter what kind of ice cream his boyfriend ordered everytime they took Scorp to the park and had ice cream together. But it did.
Harry loved food. He had broadened Draco's palate significantly by cooking for him; he used a wide array of spices and herbs, he'd loved learning to cook and reclaiming a piece of his childhood.
Draco just couldn't wrap his mind around Harry ordering vanilla every time. They were still eating their ice cream while Scorpius was off playing on the swings when Draco decided he simply couldn't take it any more. "Why do you always order vanilla ice cream?"
"Hmm?" Harry asked, turning his head from watching Scorpius on the swings to looking at Draco.
"Why do you always order vanilla ice cream?" he repeated. "They have like two dozen flavors in that store and-"
"I've never had anything other than vanilla," he replied, brow furrowing. "The Dursleys didn't let me have sweets," he said, and Draco burned with the familiar anger he had everytime Harry talked about them. "But Mrs. Figg gave me a little vanilla ice cream once," he said, smiling a little at the memory.
"So you've never-"
There was a wail across the park and Harry was out of his seat before Draco could even get his eyes on Scorpius. "I've got him," he said, already moving toward Draco's son, who appeared to have fallen from the swing.
He watched as Harry cuddled Scorpius and brushed the dirt off, obviously comisserating with him, and a plan started to form in the back of his mind.
(Read more below the cut)
Harry really enjoyed Scorpius. He was never upset when plans changed because Draco had a child, or about some things moving slower than they might have otherwise, because he really liked Scorpius.
And he really liked watching Draco with his child. There was something about it that made Harry want to melt into a puddle.
But he also really enjoyed the times when Scorp was at his mum's house and he could come over after work and spend time with Draco without feeling like he was upsetting their routine. Tonight was one of those nights and he rang the doorbell, bouncing a little on his toes while he waited for Draco to answer.
It was only a moment before the door opened and revealed Draco in a pair of jeans and a t-shirt that Harry was fairly sure belonged to him. Something warm and pleased rumbled in his chest at the sight.
"Come in," Draco said, smiling widely at him and stepping back to give Harry room to make it through the door.
"Hi," he said, leaning in and pressing a kiss to Draco's cheek. "How was your day?"
Draco hooked his fingers through Harry's and gave him a tug toward the kitchen, "I have a surprise for you."
"Oh?" he asked, always pleased to have a surprise involving food waiting for him.
He wasn't quite sure what he was expecting, but it certainly wasn't this. The table was covered in pints of ice cream, all of their lids off, revealing all sorts of flavors.
"Draco, what-"
"You said that you'd only ever had vanilla ice cream," Draco said, not quite meeting his gaze. "And I didn't like that, because you love food! You love flavors and textures, and-" his brow furrowed, "everything about food, so-"
"So you bought dozens of flavors of ice cream so that I could try them?" he asked, his chest felt like a hole had been blown clean through it. What was he meant to say to that? How could he possibly-
"Well if you don't like it, just say so," Draco said, arms crossed over his chest defensively. "You don't have to-"
"Draco," he said, catching his chin in his fingers and meeting his eyes, "I love you," he said. Draco's eyes widened and Harry replayed what he'd just said and realized his error. "It," he corrected. "I love it. I love this," he rambled. "So thoughtful of you-"
Draco leaned in and pressed his lips to Harry's. When he pulled back he whispered, "I love you too." And Harry's heart filled to bursting, ready to fly from his chest. "Let's try some ice cream," he said with a grin, "And then maybe I'll show you a favorite game of mine with chocolate sauce," he added with a wink.
The temptation to put the ice cream under a stasis and ask Draco to show him the game first was great. But as he looked at the table, at the love and care with which Draco had set it all out, he couldn't. He wanted fun, and games, and sex, but more than that he wanted intimacy. He wanted to be known, to be loved and cared for, and ice creams laid out across the table was exactly that. "Where should we start?"
Draco started talking about the way that he'd organized the flavors and the road map he'd planned, and Harry fell a little bit more in love.
prompt: panick attack!Draco and harry to the rescue
Circles
Harry hurriedly cut the phone call he was on, stuffing his phone back in his pocket and fetching his keys, cursing at the quarters that fell out when he took out the keys.
He kicked open the door with a light kick because of his hands full and walked into towards the living room and dropping all his files and bag over the piled-up things already there on the table and thereafter finally decided to go into the bedroom only he hadn't expected to walk into what he actually walked into. He walked rapidly towards the bed and hugged the shaking man.
" shush- Draco- love, I'm here- I'm here now " Harry rubbed his back while Draco still kept shaking under his hold.
Harry kissed the top of his head as he heard his whimpers and reassured Draco over and over again that he was finally here and everything is alright. This was his 5th panic attack after Harry had returned from St. Mungo's after a month of being in the facility due to the coma he was in. It was understandable how Draco was scared each time Harry would leave and sometimes without telling him so Draco wouldn't worry but it pained Harry each time he walked into a shaking Draco. He wasn't always like this, nor did he ever have frequent attacks but ever since the last case Harry did and almost died at the scene if it wasn't for the rest of the team and his remote chances of surviving back then had taken a toll on Draco. He was told too many times that Harry's chances of waking up from the coma were very slim and his injuries were rather deadly but it only hit Draco more during the time Harry was having fits while waking up from it and Draco assumed that he was never going to see him again and that was the first attack. Ever since Harry had returned Draco had been so much better but with quitting his job and giving out new applications, Harry had to leave Draco alone sometimes, and someday's Draco goes absolutely fine without it but someday's like today Draco winds himself up in too many worries and the deadliest possibilities that he ends up having another attack and while normally Harry always comes just in time and reassures him, Harry still remains afraid and worried of Draco a lot. He worries a lot if this was what the rest of the coming years would look like.
" Draco" Harry calls him, cupping his face to force him to look at Harry " babe, listen- look at me- I'm right here and I'm not going anywhere, alright" harry reassures. Draco tries to nod but he could still feel himself constricting too much.
" Look at me- just keep looking at me- I'm here and I'm never leaving you alright- ever, okay- Can you count for me, just till 5, can you do that ?" Harry asked.
Draco nodded and stuttered out the numbers yet Harry knew it didn't help.
" Love- okay Tell me your favorite colour" Harry asks again
" Emerald " Draco replied, his voice soothing by just a fraction.
" And where do you see them the most ?" Harry asks, his hands moving into intertwine with that of Draco to affirm him of a comforting physical touch.
" Your eyes" Draco replied. Harry felt it in his hands when Draco's shaking lessened little by little.
" You like my eyes ?" Harry asked
Draco nodded and Harry smiled " I love your eyes too- You know the clouds outside reminded me of your eyes today, then I thought about you and then I thought about how much I love you- do you know how much I love you? More stars love the moon, or the sun does the moon or more than infinity- I love you so much- much more than anything in the world, more than anything in the universe "
Draco tried to smile and Harry took it as a good sign and pressed his forehead against Draco's and with his intertwined fingers, he drew circles on his thighs to distract him.
" You like circles- right ?"
Harry could feel him nod.
" Draw circles with me," Harry asked, and then Draco too with his intertwined hands drew circles over his own thighs. A moment or two later, Harry's eyes danced over his exposed wrist and he pulled his sleeve getting an idea and exposed the tattoo he got of Draco's Patronus, a doe and with Draco's fingers and traced it and found instantly how his breathing turned normal moment by moment as they kept tracing the tattoo on his wrist and eventually with Harry's added assurances Draco's faltered breathing came to normal and Harry kissed his cheek when it did so.
" How do you feel now?"
"Better" Draco nodded but neither of them moved away, their foreheads still pressed together and hands still tracing over Harry's tattoo.
" I really love you Draco" Harry assured him once again.
" I know" Draco's voice broke as he said so and Harry immediately created space to look at Draco.
"I'm never leaving you alone" Harry confirmed
"I want you to- I can't spend the rest of my life having attacks every time you go out- I don't want you to be worried every single time you walk into the bedroom and find me like this- I wish you would stop worrying about me" Harry could see it in his face how hurt Draco was and it pained him to see Draco like this and he just wishes he could take his pain but he didn't know-how.
" But I worry about you, just like you do for me" Harry assured
"But you don't end up like me- I want to be fine-"
" You are fine, love, you are. You almost lost me and I would never know how it feels, okay- It's okay what you feel and how you feel and there's nothing wrong- stop worrying about how unnecessary you feel or how stupid it seems to you- If I had almost lost you- I can't even think of anything after that- I would've never been able to survive, but you did- You are so strong Draco- even when you think you're not, You are. You are strong, beautiful, and gorgeous and the fact that I put you through this hurts me so much but I can't take it back, I wish I could but I can't and I wish I could just do something to make it all go away but I can't except I can promise you that I will always love you, even in the afterlife " Harry painfully told him and it was true, Harry could never survive in a world without Draco, to even think of a life without Draco scared let alone see he almost dying, Harry would've lost his sanity but he knew it that there was nowhere he would ever rather be but with Draco.
Draco couldn't say anything even if he wanted to, he could have said so many things but nothing even made sense nor did he even know what to say except that he knew he was the luckiest man alive.
" I love you Harry- don't ever leave me" Draco pleaded.
Harry smiled at him and promised him " Never" and even if he worried someday's about Draco, he kept his promise.
This request is so old that I had even forgotten this existed. Nevertheless I hope you liked it
Hi lovelies! I’m inordinately proud of this series, y’all, so I’m gonna reblog shamelessly, ok? I wrote 28,483 words in 31 days! Thank you for all the love and comments...this wasn’t created in a vacuum and I appreciate everyone who supported me in this endeavor! BIG LOVE Y’ALL!
Enjoy! xoxo peach
Autumn Drarry Drabble Complete AO3 Series here!
* * *
31 Autumn Drarry Drabbles Masterlist
Day 1 || AO3 🧡 PSL, I Love You
Day 2 || AO3 🖤 tricks or treats
Day 3 || AO3 💜 Can I Tempt You?
Day 4 || AO3 💚 Kiss My Fist
Day 5 || AO3 🧡 Duty Bound
Day 6 || AO3 🖤 twitterpated
Day 7 || AO3 💜 Draco L. Malfoy vs. The Weasley Sweater
Day 8 || AO3 💚 If You Wish
Day 9 || AO3 🧡 I Can See Clearly
Day 10 || AO3 🖤 apple of my eye
Day 11 || AO3 💜 Slowly, Gently, Deeply
Day 12 || AO3 💚 Manor House No.7
Day 13 || AO3 🧡 Psycho
Day 14 || AO3 🖤 Special Recipe
Day 15 || AO3 💜 Certified Grade A
Day 16 || AO3 💚 The Legendary House of Gucci
Day 17 || AO3 🧡 gold in my pocket
Day 18 || AO3 🖤 That Touch of Pink
Day 19 || AO3 💜 Life Imitates Art
Day 20 || AO3 💚 a thousand reflections
Day 21 || AO3 🧡 You Kill Me
Day 22 || AO3 🖤 Permission Granted
Day 23 || AO3 💜 the luck of the draw
Day 24 || AO3 💚 Luxury Tent
Day 25 || AO3 🧡 It’s the Great Pumpkin, Harry Potter
Day 26 || AO3 🖤 flannel is a love language
Day 27 || AO3 💜 Forces of Attraction
Day 28 || AO3 💚 hide the path so softly
Day 29 || AO3 🧡 Some Like it Hot
Day 30 || AO3 🖤 Green Pastures, Still Waters
Day 31 || AO3 💜 Peace, Love and Sunflowers, Motherf**kers
- Harry tries a new one and Draco says he smells worse than Weasley
- Harry puts on amortentia and strides up to Draco
- Draco doesn’t smell anything different…
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“Oh for Merlin’s sake!” Draco snaps as we work on our potion, “You reek of cheap cologne.” He shakes his head, grey eyes challenging me but I just ignore the jibe, going to the cupboard to get the mistletoe berries for the Forgetfulness Potion. I can feel his eyes on back but when I make my way back over he’s inspecting the instructions so I throw in four of the berries, rolling my eyes as he yelps and jumps away from the splash back, “What the hell Harry!”
I stay quiet and go to stir the potion five times as it says, noticing it said to crush the berries not to put them straight in the cauldron and just hope Draco hasn’t. “It says anti-clockwise you poof!” Draco shooes me away so I just sit down, watching as the blood red liquid begins to bubble up and suddenly, and kind of predictably, there’s a crash. Draco ends up on the floor, covered from head to toe in the potion, a few drops splattering onto my robes.
“Mister malfoy, it said to crush the berries before putting them in.” Professor Slughorn comes over and I frown because everyone knows Draco aces Potions but me on the other hand…
“Ah Professor, that was me.” I interrupt, much to the rest of the class’ surprise and go over to my ex nemesis, offering him a hand to which he surprises me by taking. Once he’s on his feet he lets my hand go and takes a huge step back, head bowed and hair falling over his face, the red a sharp contrast to his usually platinum hair.
“Well clear this up then you may both be excused to go sort yourself out.” Slughorn nods, eyes narrowing slightly at Draco who goes to protest but decides against it with a heavy sigh. He goes to grab the cauldron but I stop him, hand on his arm, telling him to go and that I can do it.
He raises his head, grey eyes meeting mine for a fleeting second, long enough for me to realise they’re shining with tears, before nodding in thanks then turning and leaving the classroom.
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Dinner rolls around and I’m following Ron and Hermione down to the great hall, sitting at the eighth year table that has been squeezed in by along the far wall. I sit opposite my two best mates, watching their usual habits of eating with a small smile as maybe things are starting to go back to normal. Ron, of course, beings to fill his plate with as much as he can while Hermione only takes the vegetables, trying a muggle thing called being vegetarian at which Ron rolls his eyes.
“You not going to eat?” The familiar smell of apple tart fills my senses and I immediately know Draco has joined us for some reason. Looking up, Blaise is sitting himself next to Ron, trying to ignite a conversation while Pansy has sat on my otherside eating and ignoring us all.
“Hadn’t got round to it yet.” I reply and actually decide to pile on some sausages and mash onto my plate. Before I can dig in Hermione layers my food with a mountain of vegetables, making me grumble but stop at the look she gives me, “Why are you here?” I turn my attention back to Draco.
“I came to say thank you,” He holds his hand out for me to shake and I pause before shaking it, “But your cologne smells worse than before, did you use the Weasel’s?” He snorts which a playful smirk on his lips. I raise an eyebrow at him and he shrugs, beginning to get himself some food so I go back to my own, always enjoying the food Hogwarts provides. The first feast I had here was the first time I had ever been able to eat a proper meal without having been the one to make it.
I’m jogged from my thoughts by Draco elbowing me, to which I go to protest until he nods across the table where Blaise and Ron are having what seems like a stare off but their faces are way too close for it to be just that, making me realise what’s going on, “Are they?” I whisper and Draco leans closer, replying with an “Uh-huh. Flirting.”
“And you called me a poof.” I protest, remembering from Potions earlier.
“You’re wearing Weasley’s cologne, guys don’t share.” He replies and I narrow my eyes at him, deciding to prove him wrong and that I can smell really good. Tomorrow I’m going to wear some amortentia, then I know he won’t be able to resist me - wait what? No, no, no, he won’t be able to say I smell bad or mock my cologne.
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This was a bad idea I realise as I’ve had so many people come up to me and ask what I’m wearing, some chasing me saying they love me and that it was meant to be. Turning the corner I spot a familiar blond figure talking to Pansy so I sprint over.
“Quick, how do I smell?” I interrupt and practically hide behind Draco when Pansy’s eyes widen as she gets a whiff of the amortentia.
“Like the Weasel’s cologne so still awful.” Draco replies and I pause, “Why does Pansy look like she wants to eat you?”
“I’m wearing amortentia.” I hiss and he freezes before turning to face me, burying his face in my neck and mumbling something, “What?”
“You’re going to kill me Potter.” He pulls away and slams his lips to mine, making let out a squeak of surprise before I realise this is what I’ve always wanted.
Draco didn't know why he'd agreed to come on this trip in the first place.
He didn't like the beach; the sun was to hot, sand was scratchy and it got everywhere, the ocean made his skin feel crusty and itchy, and the heat turned his fair skin bright red. Beach holidays didn't show him to his best advantage.
But everyone in their friend group was going and when Potter had looked at him with his stupid, big, green eyes and all but begged him to come, Draco hadn't been able to refuse.
So here he sat on a beach chair, under a giant umbrella, sweating profusely, trying not to get sand in his long island iced tea, and keeping his sun glasses firmly in place over his eyes so that Potter wouldn't catch him oggling his arse in his tight swim trunks.
Merlin, Draco didn't know what he'd been thinking.
The desire to touch and oggle Potter would have been too much for anyone, with his long, wild curls; his gorgeous bronze skin getting darker by the minute, all smooth and wet, water clinging to the hair on his chest and the trail leading down into his swim trunks. But it was the glimpse of a tattoo on his hip, peaking just over the waistband of his swim trunks, when they'd ridden low as he was coming out of the water, that made Draco have to physically restrain himself.
It wasn't fair to add another mystery, he was already too attractive as it was. And Draco was hopelessly besotted.
He stared at the other man as he started heading up the beach, until he realized he was on his way over to him. Then he quickly dropped his gaze back to the book he'd been pretending to read.
"Hey," Potter said, collapsing right into the sand next to Draco's chair.
He looked up and feigned nonchalance, "Oh, hello," he said. "Enjoying your time in the ocean?"
Potter nodded and smile at him, "It's brilliant. I've never been to the ocean before."
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"No?"
Potter shook his head, "Have you?"
"A few times," he said. "My grandmere lived in the south of France, so," he shrugged.
"That sounds fun," he said.
He nodded, "There were so many things I enjoyed more than the beach, though."
"Have you ever been to a bonfire on the beach when the sun is setting?" he asked.
Draco laughed, "Can't say that I have."
"They're having one tonight," Potter said, "if you wanted to come?"
"Oh," he said, "I don't think they'd really want-"
"I want you there," Potter said earnestly. "And all of our friends do too-"
"But the people hosting-"
"Won't care a bit. Come on," he cajoled, "please Draco?"
And how was he ever meant to say no to that face?
He huffed, "Oh I suppose."
Harry grinned bright as the sun, "Excellent. I was going to head back to shower and change if you wanted to walk back to the house together?" he offered. "I'll carry your chair and umbrella for you."
"And they say chivalry is dead," he teased, heart leaping at the chance to spend more time with Potter, to bask in his presence like proverbial sunshine, and hope he didn't get burned.
Harry folded up the chair and umbrella, "I aim to please," he said.
He laughed and picked up his drink and his novel, the only things left at this point, and followed Harry back toward the house they were all staying in. Sand clung to his feet, prickly and hot, and he wondered how the other man seemed to be immune to the unpleasantness.
"Are you reading for pleasure or for work?" Harry asked, nodding at the book in his hand.
"Why can't it be both?"
He made a face at Draco like he'd given him broccoli after promising him chocolate.
Draco laughed and bumped Harry's shoulder with his, casually, like this was the sort of thing they did. "It's for fun," he clarified.
"Good," he said. "So you're enjoying the trip?" he asked, so earnestly that Draco couldn't possibly say no and crush his hopes.
'Yes," he said. And it was true in many ways; he'd enjoyed sleeping in, enjoyed the free beverages, enjoyed watching Harry in his swim trunks.
"Good." He smiled over at Draco, "I'd hate to think that I dragged you along on a vacation you hated."
"Thanks for inviting me," he said as they started to climb the steps into the house.
Harry grinned at him, "Thanks for coming. It's always more fun when you're here."
He blinked and tried to keep his wits about him, tried not to smile at Harry like he was the sun, but honestly, he was sure that if he looked in the mirrow right now, he'd see himself all but beaming.
"I'm going to jump in the shower," Harry informed him, shrinking his beach chair and umbrella and tucking them into the shelf beside the door. "See you in half an hour?"
He nodded helplessly and Harry smiled back at him before disappearing and leaving Draco to try to get himself together and decide what to wear to the bonfire.
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The bonfire was actually pretty enjoyable, and it was easy because he was surrounded by their friends and Harry was at his side almost the entire time. His head was pleasantly light from the beer he'd drunk and his mind was drifting along without really fretting over things.
It made him feel a bit out of place, like he was welcome but wasn't really where he was meant to be. Everyone was a bit too loud, a bit too excited to be here drinking.
Without really meaning to, he found himself wandering over toward the ocean and collapsing in the sand. The sun was setting over the waves, turning them brilliant shades of oranges, pinks, and reds. And Draco allowed himself to soak in the colors, to absorb the warmth of the setting sun into his chilled skin. Draco pulled his knees up to his chest so he could rest his chin on them and wrap himself up in a cozy little ball.
He wasn't alone very long when he felt someone join him, Harry's body settling next to his. "Hey," he murmured.
Turning his head, he allowed himself to take in the beauty that was Harry in the setting sun, his skin warm and inviting, curls catching in the breeze. "Hi," he whispered back.
Harry looked over at him and their eyes met, "What are you thinking?" he asked.
"You're really pretty."
His mouth popped open and he blinked at Draco in surprise, like he hadn't ever imagined that Draco might say something like that.
"Sorry," he said uncertainly, not entirely sure how to walk that back into his mouth at this point.
Harry smiled, sweet and a little shy, eyes not quite meeting Draco's, "You don't have to be sorry. That's one of the nicest things-"
"Stop," he laughed. "That is not one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to you!" He shook his head, "I've been at balls and galas that were held in your honor."
"Yeah, but you actually meant it," he argued.
"They did too!"
He huffed, "But you actually know me. They don't, they just wanted to blow smoke up my arse and get me to endorse whatever their latest agenda item is. You don't want anything from me."
"Well, I wouldn't say that," he replied before he could stop himself.
Green eyes twinkled with mischief, "Is that so?"
"Mmm," he hummed.
"What do you want from me?" Harry asked, searching Draco's eyes like he might find the answer there before his gaze dropped to Draco's lips.
"Kiss me," he whispered.
And before he could so much as move, Harry was cupping his cheek in his warm palm and drawing their mouths together. He kissed him softly, sweet little sips that left Draco breathless and clinging to him as Harry bent awkwardly over Draco's knees.
When he pulled back, Draco was light-headed with desire, still clinging to his shoulders, his fingers clenching in Harry's flannel shirt. He nudged his nose against Draco's and let his fingers trail over his neck and arms, "You're cold," he murmured.
"Significantly less so than I was before," he laughed.
Harry pulled back all the way and tugged his flannel off and Draco watched helplessly besotted as he wrapped it around Draco's shoulders. It was still warm from his body and Draco sank into it, inhaling the scent of Harry's shampoo and cologne, and whatever else it was that smelled uniquely like Harry.
"Thanks," he murmured.
He nodded and flopped back by Draco's side, taking in the waves and all the changes the setting sun had made in the minutes just before.
"Can I ask a question?"
Harry turned his head to look at Draco once more, his face open and soft in a way that Draco could become rapidly addicted to.
"What's your tattoo?"
At that, Harry grinned at him, a little dangerous and a lot tempting, and Draco just knew he was in the best kind of trouble imaginable. "You'll just have to wait and see."
"Are you asleep?" Draco whispered, brushing an errant curl back off his lover's face and waiting for a reply. He watched Harry's chest rise and fall slowly, evenly; traced his eyes over his face, lax with sleep; contemplated counting his long, dark eyelashes fanning across his cheeks.
"Thank you for waking me up with a cup of tea this morning before you left," Draco murmured softly, keeping his voice low the way he always did when he talked to Harry after he went to sleep. "It's probably my second favorite way to wake up," he added. "But anytime you're still here after the sun is coming through the window is a good day," he said.
Harry let out a huff-snore that Draco honestly shouldn't find as adorable as he did.
"It was a good day today, don't you think?" he asked. It wasn't always a good day and he talked about those too, since Harry wasn't consciously listening.
"I realized something today," Draco continued. "I was watching you tying Teddy's shoe at the playground and the thought popped right into my head, like it's always been there. I'm in love with you."
He wanted to laugh at himself, wondered if Harry would have if he'd been awake. Or perhaps Harry would have been gentle, would have told him that he just didn't feel the same. Draco was a fantastic fuck but not someone he could love, surely.
"And I know," he added, just in case Harry's subconscious was listening, the way it sometimes seemed to. "I know that you couldn't possibly love me back. That's not what I'm asking for, it's just..." he trailed off and let his fingers skim over Harry's bicep, "It's nice to be in love, even if it's just me."
"It's not just you," Harry murmured and Draco almost jumped out of his skin.
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"Are you awake?" Draco asked, feeling nearly hysterical.
"Of course I am," Harry replied, peeking through one eye at him. "I always am, I thought that was the point?"
"The point of what?!" he asked incredulously.
"The way you confess things to me every night?" Potter asked, sounding more confused than Draco.
Draco stared uncomprehendingly at him. This couldn't be happening to him. "You're always awake?"
"Well, yeah," Harry said, brow furrowing. "Why did you think I stopped leaving my socks lying about your flat? Or started brushing my teeth before I kissed you in the morning? Or-"
"Yes, yes, I get the picture," Draco snapped.
"I'm confused," Harry said, reaching over to the nightstand and patting around for his glasses. "I thought the point of you talking to me late at night, while I pretended I was sleeping was so that you could say the things that were hard for you to say," he said as he shoved his glasses on his face.
"But you weren't supposed to be pretending to be asleep. You were actually supposed to be asleep. Merlin," he muttered thinking of all of the things he'd said to the other man. "I can't believe you didn't say something."
"About what?" Harry asked.
"How rude and demanding I am!" Draco said. "I never would have said all of those things if I'd known-"
"Precisely," Harry said. "I thought that was the point, it was hard for you to bring things up during the day but it was easier to say them at night. It's not like it's a big deal."
"It is a big deal!" Draco all but shouted. "And I just told you that I love you to your face! Circe," he groaned, "You might as well just leave now, Potter. I don't need your pity or-"
"Draco," Harry said, grasping his face in both of his hands, "Calm down." The other man took a slow deep breath and Draco found himself mirroring him without intending to. "Listen to me," Harry said, his voice very calm and unbearably gentle.
Draco closed his eyes, he couldn't watch Harry's face while he shattered his heart.
"You are not in this alone," Harry said. "Draco, I've been in love with you for months," he added, "I just didn't want to scare you away."
His eyes flew open "Scare me away?" he asked incredulously. "You were afraid of scaring me away."
"Well, yes," Harry said, as though it was completely reasonable. "I always fall fast and fall hard. I didn't want to tell you too soon and make everything weird."
"Harry," he said, still feeling a bit shell shocked, "You are the best..." he trailed off looking for the right word, "boyfriend, person," he shook his head, "everything. How could I possibly have thought-"
"Because you are so far out of my league!" Harry exclaimed. "You're gorgeous, and intelligent, and sexy, and-"
"Are you kidding me? Harry, you're literally the savior of the world! And-"
"Okay," Harry said, interrupting him. "Okay. No, this is good," he said. "Good. We're both a little damaged and have bad self perception but we're both in love with the other. This is good." He looked up at Draco, "Right?"
And all of the anxiety and hysteria that had been buzzing through Draco's blood stream evaporated at the earnest look on Harry's face. "Yeah," he said, pulling Harry's body closer to his, "Yeah, this is good."
Tentatively the other man leaned up and kissed him, lips soft and gentle on Draco's. "I do love you," Harry whispered into the corner of Draco's mouth.
"I love you, too," he replied. "But Potter, you need to tell me when you're fucking awake."
Harry huffed, "Only if you promise to start having conversations with me when I'm awake, then." His fingers trailed up Draco's spine, "I'm not going anywhere, you know. You won't scare me away by asking me to throw out my leftovers, or by telling me that you really don't like Greek food, or by requesting we avoid watching horror movies because they give you nightmares." He kissed Draco's forehead, "I'm not going anywhere," he repeated.
"In that case," Draco said, taking a deep breath, "Would you like to move in with me?"
"I thought you'd never ask," Harry replied with a radiant smile.
And maybe, just maybe, Draco slowly started learning to ask for what he wanted.
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AHHH! OH MY GOODNESS! Please do yourself a favor and check out this beautiful art that @pato-roldnart made for this ficlet!! It's so beautiful, and tender, and transcendent. I don't have the words to describe it, it's just so beautiful! <3
