#dumb witch

[ace-crowbar]

Lesson learned, fire is fire

magic or no

i’ve been burning a spell for a few days with no issues, but todaaay the whole thing decided to combust and burn a massive flame for four or more minutes. the short candle melted the pillar in half causing the whole thing to collapse throwing my tea lights on the floor, and set my altar on fire(i was being safe, the fire was controlled))(mostly), my tarot cards said my spell may have backfired and will in turn cause me to have terrific nightmares and anxiety. my cards are sadistic shits and wouldn’t tell me what i did wrong or how to fix it.... how much trouble am i in?

Fire saftey first guys, learn from my mistakes

[tarot-on-a-technicality]

Welcome to more dumb tech witch ideas but... Thought occurred to me. My roomba goes everywhere in the house... Is there something i can do to make it more... Witchy cleansing? Short of strapping burning incense to it ofc. But like... Automated witch vaccuum... Maybe a sigil? Hmm...

[mountainmagpie]

witchy, bitchy, and hungry for a sandwhichy

[wannabewiedzma]

How to tell the difference between artemisia vulgaris (mugwort) and artemisia absinthium (wormwood) in practice

the fuck if I know, i’m trying for two fucking years and I’m still not sure

[lunerbean]

I didn't realize my housemate was home and I was definitely talking to myself

Somethings he had to have heard:

"Is that cum?? Oh God, I hope that's not cum... or paint. It might be paint"

(To my plants) "Oh you bitches are THORSTY"

*mumbling a Latin incantation for protection* followed by, in English "WITCHCRAFT!"

*more mumbling about protection while spray the house with a cleansing spray*

"I know this is supposed to repel spiders, but what if they all just came out of hiding because of it and took over the house..."

He hasn't said a word about any of it so basically, if I suddenly need a new place to live, you'll know why...

[satanurqween-blog]

💰Money Cycle💰

"Please bring me money I'm broke as shit"

I plead with my new money spell,

After spending all my money

On supplies for more money spells.

💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸💸

~one broke bitch♡

But actually, I went to an artist market today and a super nice girl gave me a $25 skull dish for free! She said "it's a blessing day". 🥰 I also found black hardcover notebooks I've been searching for, for a great price- and I got so many candles from my favorite candle store the other day because of an amazing sale! Money spells work so amazingly. You don't get moneybags dropped on your porch, or mysterious deposits into your bank account; but I've gotten coupons from random strangers for the store I'm currently in, stumbled upon amazing sales for the things I need, etc. So awesome.

[pigeonflavouredcake]

Me: *puts tarot card in stupid place*

Tarot card: *falls into candle and nearly catches fire*

Me: JEzuS MoThER FrICKinG CraP how did that happen!?

[hellenic-devotional]

Me: pulls out my spell book and materials

Deity: what about,,,,

Me: jumps off a cliff because I decided to do summoning magic without a protection spell

Deity: Oof