Report, by Dylan Marsh
“Hello, hello is this thing on?”
“Yes, you are coming through beautifully.”
“Excellent I never know how to work these damn machines, I mean honestly I can disprove newton’s turd law and I can’t do this, honestly.”
“Well Ma’am we are just looking for the report on what is going on at your outpost.”
“Well I can’t complain but I am going to anyway, let me start with the list of complaints I compiled, ah-hem, the lifts don’t work, the heating is broken, the soundproofing on the test chambers is faulty, the walls to section 2-3 leak, if there is a power outage then all the cell doors open and we have had three escape attempts this week alone.” (Deep intake of breath)
“I see do you have any proposed solutions to these problems?”
“You know what I am so glad you asked, can you tell the chairman, if you can find him in his ivory tower, that if he wants me to keep this place running and too keep with the quota then I need more resources.”
“Anything specific we should tell him ma’am?”
“Well first we have been going through pris- I mean test subjects a lot faster than we originally thought we would. This is a big problem for me because if I can’t test the things he wants me to build on human test subjects then production is going to grind to a halt. Also, the workers he is sending me are too high maintenance and they keep asking questions. I will not be held accountable if one has to be vanished to stop them blabbing. So, tell him that I want de-classified class-g workers that means that no one will worry if they go missing.”
“Ma’am you do realise that this project is meant to be hidden from the council if too many workers are diverted to you they may start asking questions?”
“Do not tell me what I do and do not know commander, I may only be science division but I am a higher rank than you will ever be.”
“Moving on ma’am I heard you mention escapes, have they been dealt with?”
“Who do you think I am? Don’t let things slip through my fingers. Yes, there were three escape attempts but only one of them managed to exit the facility.”
“What happened to them?”
“Well the two who attempted to help the third escape have been fitted with trackers and were processed the following day.”
“And the third?”
“Well let’s just say that he had an unfortunate accident.”
“I do need to know ma’am, for the record.”
“Well I will send you the bits of him that are left if you want, but I promise you this you won’t be able to determine the cause of death trust me I was the one that pushe- I mean saw him fall, and even I don’t know.”
“Well then ma’am I will send this onto the chairman and report back to you with the results.”
“You make sure you do; the chairman is asking me to do miracles here and I am providing but if he doesn’t keep up his end of the bargain there may be an accident waiting around the corner for him too.”
“Are you threatening the chairman ma’am I must warn you that is a clad 3-offence.”
“I am not threatening I am waning him, and I would watch your tone with me because I may look friendly but I assure you underneath this mask I will stop at nothing, Absentia out.
(Feed terminates)
“Good lord is she always so intense?”
“Yes, she is sir, are you going to relay her instructions to the chairman?”
“Well I have to but some of the things she is suggesting are preposterous.”
“I know that sir but you have to admit she gets results, even if her methods are unorthodox.”













