Apr 8
This major city has lost fucking everything to eldrich religious horrors and themselves and this bitch over here plugging in her goddess of loss like she's a fucking SoundCloud rapper. God bless you lethica nightborne.
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This major city has lost fucking everything to eldrich religious horrors and themselves and this bitch over here plugging in her goddess of loss like she's a fucking SoundCloud rapper. God bless you lethica nightborne.
GUYS IM ON EPISODE 20 ON EOM GUYS GUYS GUYS GUYS WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING
dating someone who has genuine respect for you changes everything.
as you recite things from your past, you see their eyes widen in disbelief.
they tell you “friends” wouldnt do that.. they help you see peoples true intentions.
it is both depressing to realise most of your life/interactions/friendships are revolving around you being used, and yet wonderful to become self-aware and realise you can move into a more positive light with them at your side.
thoughts on wasted devotion.
i think you could've been a good man. but you're a complete coward who runs away from your feelings. so yeah, it hurt for a while, and i was pretty pathetic trying to fix whatever we had. but now? i'm so much happier, and i really don't think i love you anymore. because if you had ever loved me... you wouldn't have done all you did, and said all you said. you're going to regret it when you realize how fucking down for you i was, and how i used to look at you like you were magic. and i think that's why being friends with me scares you. because you can't handle seeing me not look at you like that anymore. i did all i could and i went through my hell. yours is just beginning.
i would always be the other woman. no matter what. maybe thats what im supposed to be, and why i assumed the role so quickly and without question – but you grew too comfortable and i thought for a split second that i might see you as more than a person. and when you brought up leaving because i have "too much going on", it stung a little. and this care for you is why i have to cut it off now. i will snap my own heart into a million tiny, unrecoverable pieces before i will let you even crack it. i got so lost in every wonderful thing about you that i forgot you are just you. youre one person, in a world of billions more. and the way your words turned cruel at the first sign of struggle you didnt understand? i wouldnt even let the one man i love talk to me like that, and youre on a level so far below him its beyond your comprehension. see how quickly i fell back when he expressed disapproval? im in love with someone else, sweetie. and its not the kind of 'polyamorous', i-can-have-both-of-you type shit youre on. i am entirely his and everyone else is just a fling. just entertainment. a lesson on why never to get close to me. i wont ever trust a thing. i suppose youre an example of the causes now.
•••
the person i've been in love with since i was a little kid feels the same way. we've found our way back to it again. it's more real this time around than its ever been. every heart i've ever broken was in the name of not knowing what to do in his love's absence. nobody means anything to me except for him. and now he's here and my head is spinning with something warm and comforting. like home. being this attached to someone is never good, mind you. i'm just a lot happier than i've been in a while. i love him more than any of you know. since i was in 4th grade. motherfuckin fairy tale shit right there.
•••
when you can feel yourself coming down with a wicked cold so u go outside to smoke a cigarette i am the epitome of health