Tell me ur secrets: 5, 17, and 20 for the writing meta asks
SECRETS UNDER THE CUT 💥💥💥 (NO CLICKBAIT) (CAUGHT IN 4K)
5. What character that you’re writing do you most identify with?Chip from JRWI, especially early-canon Chip. I found his combination of bravado and self-doubt very fascinating. And very... relatable. Anyone who’s read Breaking Free can definitely tell that I have a special spot in my heart for him!! Also when I started listening to JRWI I had the biggest crush on Gillion so I projected it all on Chip LMAOOO
I'm currently writing a lot of Vashwood, and though I won't say I identify with them, there are aspects of their characters that resonate with me. Wolfwood's internal battle against his own humanity is something I love to examine!! I also love the demands that Vash makes of himself, even if they're unreasonable, even if they're tearing him apart. I like how it's not really out of his indomitable FIGHTING SPIRIT, it's out of pure necessity (Trimax Vash, anyway) (Stampede Vash is a different story). They're both things that I find myself drawn to!!
17. Do you think readers perceive your work - or you - differently to you? What do you think would surprise your readers about your writing or your motivations?
Ooh, that's a hard question. I wouldn't really know because I... don't interact with readers much (outside of answering comments). But if I had to guess, I'd say that readers think that every writing decision is a carefully-calculated move, rife with symbolism and subtext!! I remember this nice comment I got on Breaking Free ch1, where they applauded me for making Chip empty out his cup of punch, as the action coincided perfectly with his emotional outburst. That commenter was... not wrong! But I didn't write the action with that specific intention in mind. I just thought, 'this would be an appropriate time for him to toss out his punch'.
My train of thought, when writing, is more amorphous than people might expect. I map out the significant plot beats and the themes, but most of the time I just write what feels right. And some other times, I write what feels COOL. No reason other than that!!
In a nutshell: I feel like I'm perceived as a more purposeful writer than I actually am.
20. Tell us the meta about your writing that you really want to ramble to people about (symbolism you’ve included, character or relationship development that you love, hidden references, callbacks or clues for future scenes?)
HAHAHAH YOU'VE OPENED PANDORA'S BOX
Project name: depressing crossover fic (title yet to be determined). post-s1 Tristamp Wolfwood falls through a crack in the universe and ends up in post-canon Trimax, where he meets a black-haired Vash.
... and then sleeps with him.
This started as an excuse for porn, but eventually, it turned into this moody meditation on the specificity of love. Wolfwood, to Vash, is a ghost, even if he's alive and breathing. And that's... kinda easier to Wolfwood. To be loved as a ghost. He can be loved without baring himself completely, he can say yes, this is who I am, this is who I'll become, even if it's NOT TRUE. Wolfwood finds himself falling in love with Trimax's world; a world saved. He doesn't want to be himself here! Instead, he tucks his darkness away and steps into the skin of another man (it's not like Trimax Wolfwood doesn't have his share of darkness, but Tristamp Wolfwood doesn't know that).
And on Vash's end, he's suddenly in very close proximity to the man he loves! Sorta! Wolfwood's like a living, breathing uncanny valley effect! You can imagine the absolute agony that Vash is going through! If Wolfwood shuts his mouth and maybe stands at a distance, Vash can believe it's really his Wolfwood, but... that's not sustainable. The intimacy between them is something that only drives them apart!!
The fic is about running away from things; yourself, your ghosts, even your own world--and running into the arms of someone who loves you. This fic is also about how you can't run forever, and the person who truly loves 'you' never existed anyway.
Most of all, it's about giving Wolfwood and Vash EMOTIONAL DAMAGE
I was gonna write abt the Australian high school AU too but this took all my energy. Whew. Thanks for the ask!!!
uh, hi, earl! i love the way you write so so much! i was wondering if you could maybe share a few writing tips or methods you use? thank you!
first of all, thank YOU. second of all, i will talk way too much about this. be warned.
the process starts when i get possessed by an idea. if the urge is strong enough, i take notes and get to work on penning it down. if it's a one-shot or a shorter idea, i usually don't bother with planning. for example, 'lovefool' was written entirely off-the-cuff. a lot of my one-shorts were just me pulling straight from the brain.
however, for 'a thousand miles' i was drawing out a loose plan. why? i don't know. you might be like 'oh is it because it's longer than most one-shots, capping off at 10k?' here's the thing - when i started writing, i only thought it'd end up at 5k. yet i was jotting down a plan anyway. i just felt like it, i suppose
for multi-chaptered fics, you bet your ass i'm writing an EXTENSIVE plan. i have multiple pages of plans on 'heart of the sea' and 'breaking free' in my notebook, as well as notes on my og novels. those plans start out by mapping out the plot beats and significant moments of conflict. after that, i do the chapter-by-chapter breakdown. i also have a list of 'i want to put these in'.
to make stories more cohesive, i usually think up a theme to tie it together. that could be an image that repeats, a certain phrase, or concepts that i explore throughout the story. on the smaller end, a recurring image in 'lovefool' were birds, which represented chip's heart. you could say that birds were a theme here. on the larger end, the theme in 'breaking free' was something like 'friendship' and 'love' and 'musical theatre nerds are unstoppable' and 'self worth is important, kids'. i feel like i'm not making sense. i really hope i am. feel free to send follow-up questions.
anyway, i don't consciously think up a theme for every fic. sometimes it happens on its own. sometimes i'm mapping it out but another thing appears. for example, in 'heart of the sea', the theme of 'beginnings and endings' kept leaping out at me (chip's notebook with the unfinished sentences, their cut-off words to each other, etc) even though i didn't plan it?!?!?
generally, i try to plan a beginning and ending. i don't like to meander. readers can tell if you don't know what the fuck you're doing, and i like to maintain the illusion of control at all times /silly
before undertaking a major project, i like to study for it. for example, 'breaking free' is a high school au fic, right? i read several very very good high school au fics in preparation. i took note of what they did successfully, what they did unsuccessfully, and formulated my plan from there. and currently i'm trying to write a ya mystery/superhero book, so i've been reading ya mysteries/superhero book. note of advice: 'extraordinaries' by tj klune is seriously overrated. anyway, yeah - when you get a feel for the genre you wanna write, it makes your work 1000% better. besides, it's a great guideline to follow if you're anxious about beginning a type of story you've never tackled before. while i was writing 'heart of the sea', i was TERRIFIED at every step. i was constantly second guessing myself. but i'd read some time loop fics beforehand, so i wasn't going in completely blind. shout out to 'maelstrom' from the yuuri on ice fandom. lifesaver.
as for the writing process itself, i sit myself in front of my laptop, load up a playlist, and start typing. often consulting theasaurus.com. if i run out of words, i pick up a book or fic or just something good to read, and the words come back (points to previous paragraph. if i'm working on a project that's, say, a fantasy romance, i'm gonna be reading fantasy romances in my spare time between writing).
music is crucial. my words are stale without music.
if i feel like it, i might make a pinterest board for the project. this helps me get an overall feel for the vibes i'm trying to convey. the board for 'heart of the sea' had a lot of blues and greys and whites, conveying the melancholy feel of the fic. pinterest boards are also really fun to make!
additionally, my friends play a big role in my writing process. half of the jokes in 'a thousand miles' have been proofread (and made!) by my friends (thank you @boilingheart and @freakpit). actually, come to think of it, half the damn plot in that fic was made by teamwork! i also like sending off certain paragraphs or sentences to my friends for their reactions. never underestimate the motivational power of someone screaming in your dms.
anyway yeahh... i write when i feel like it, and i stop when i feel like it. unless it's nanowrimo, i'm not very disciplined about writing, and even then, i'm not that stringent about it. my schedule is 'jot something down at least once a week'.
.... fuck it's been more than a week and i haven't written anything.
i need to Get On That, actually! thanks for the indirect reminder!!!
hope this was a satisfactory answer. thanks for the ask, and i hope you're having a nice day 🤩
earl what's your favorite line / paragraph / dialogue / etc etc that line of thought that you've ever written go
HI MIMI I’M SO GLAD YOU ASKED
that’s a loaded question!! i have a lot of lines i’m fond of. i also have a lot of good lines i forget immediately after writing, and i rediscover them, and i’m like ‘oh boy this was a banger.’ i’ll go through a couple of fics i consider my best! this is gonna be long!
heart of the sea: gillion saying “you are my strength” to chip. i had that line saved since the VERY BEGINNING and i was able to execute it so well. it was one of my proudest moments. i also adored the moment chip hurled the compass into the sea. And this whole part: ‘“I love you too,” says Chip, and when he kisses Gillion again, it feels revelatory. The turn of a new page. A fresh, unmarked beginning.’
the entire fic had themes of beginnings and endings (duh, since it was a time loop fic) and it was about chip learning to move on. this moment really cemented it for me. they can finally move on, they can continue the story, they’re no longer trapped in a loop.
lovefool: personally i think i’m a genius for connecting birds with chip’s feelings. in a metaphorical sense.
before daybreak: ‘Until death do us part. Which will happen first? Vyncent’s homecoming or William’s? Shouldn’t he take the chance while he still can?’ I THINK THIS WAS ONE OF MY BEST LINES AND NO ONE SAID ANYTHING? with the ‘homecoming’ thing, i was trying to be like... william’s home is ‘death’? kinda?? do you get it??? and vynce’s home is his own dimension, obviously. at time of writing, i was like ‘THEY’RE ON BORROWED TIME LMAO.’ and. homecoming. and no one pointed it out. goddamn. i thought i was so smart for that. also when i said ‘aftermath is its own kind of ghost’ i really slayed
bitter water: every line in that fic is my favourite line
way back home: fun fact - when jay wears the white ribbon in her hair, it’s part of the navy academy uniform, but i snuck in a second meaning. in chinese culture, if you wear white in your hair, it means someone in your family has died. this has nothing to do w the favourite line, i just wanted to mention that
‘She’s bore all sorts of pain in her life, weathered grief and withstood violence, but a bowl of food made by a friend has the power to undo her. What has she come to?’ writing this line sparked this incredible sense of wistfulness in me. the entire scene with chip bringing jay congee really had me emotional because i was writing parts of this fic while i had covid, and my mum brought me congee when i was too weak with fever to get food myself.
tbh this entire fic was an exercise in how emo i could make myself. all the segments about home, the grief of losing someone you love, the displacement of your home, the knowledge that you can never find sanctuary in your hometown again, and so forth. working on this fic was a joy
advancing on real ground: ‘fuck communication, actually’ had me chuckling to myself. and gillion’s line “I’d never leave, but what other dear gestures can I give you?” is one of my favourite gillion lines i’ve written, ever.
breaking free!: this fic is too long for me to pick out specific things, but i adored writing the argument scene in ch10. one of my favourite scenes in that whole fic. another fav scene of mine is the kiss, which hasn’t even been published yet lmao. overall, this entire fic is a labour of love, and one of the favourite fics i’ve ever written, hands down
a thousand miles: SOME OF MY BEST COMEDIC WORK. the bisexual pin on harlem’s jacket and then the tear tracing down his face? the appearance of ross and le frog? their carnal relationship???
i just really liked exploring tidalwave’s relationship in this fic. it was refreshing to get out of a teen’s head and think about a more mature perspective. at time of writing this post, this fic has been the BEST experience i’ve ever had with writing a fic. my conversations with you and prince will always have a soft spot in my heart, unhinged as they were. i’ve always thought of writing as a solo endeavour, but working on this fic showed me that it didn’t have to be that way. and i could have fun doing it. it was the best experience
i think i lost track of answering the question?? but yeah, hope you had fun reading this essay lmao. thank you for asking, it’s always a delight to talk about my fics!!
hi earl im once again think about breaking free (i think about it A Lot) and i wanted to ask are there any small details or fun facts or thoughts you can drop about chip or gillion that wouldn’t really be brought up in the fic if there are any? im so intrigued by how they are in breaking free
hello!! I haven't thought about Breaking Free for a hot minute, so this gives me a good excuse to skim through my fic again and crack open my notes for it.
Off the top of my head, I can't think of anything too significant about fnc that I haven't written about. There's Gillion and Caspian's weekly Valorant matches (which I'm probably gonna put in ch11). There's the DnD podcasts that Chip listens to (maybe among those few, there's one we're familiar with...)
Gillion and Edyn are identical twins in this fic, and I only recently realised that identical twins can't be different sexes, so Edyn's trans now. If the opportunity arises, I'm gonna make it apparent in either ch11/12. I find it extraordinarily funny that their mother is an asshole but she doesn't bat an eye at her kids being queer. Trans daughter? Edyn, I'm already ordering you some puberty blockers, don't worry about it. Gay son? Gillion, can you at least keep your eyes on respectable triton men and not a loser human??
I've mostly incorporated everything I want to say into the fic. I don't usually mull over characters on their own outside of a story, if that makes sense? They exist in a tidy narrative, and when it's done, so are they.
I'll give a few fun facts about Breaking Free - it was inspired by a Dear Evan Hansen fic that was also a HSM AU. It was formerly a horror/crack/HSM AU hybrid. There were black goop monsters in the vents that were causing magic-users to fall sick. The final boss was defeated through a dance battle. Gillion and Chip still fall in love. Eventually I decided the idea was too fucking stupid so it's a slightly-less-stupid HSM story now.
Other major inspirations come from Read All About It and Tramps Like Us, both very very good Klance high school AUs. Yes, my Voltron phase never ended!
Thank you for the ask!! Don't hesitate to ask about anything else; I love talking about my fics.
