I met this guy the first week i worked at Times Supermarket, my first job in Maui. He was very curious already, i can tell, since he asked where i came from, and about my name, etc. That was one reason why i remembered him from day one.Β
2019 came and we still spoke to each other, like normal interactions of regular people. It was a friendly gesture i guess, especially since i am a cashier, and he was a frequent customer of the store (plus heβs a local). I didnβt know then that we would actually be friends, i realized that when i met his brother, his nieces and nephew. I liked that - it was a way of branching out and making connections.
The beginning of April, probably around 10:30 in the morning, i saw his brother working, i said βhiβ as a form of courtesy, he waved back at me and came to my register. He then asked some stuff, and eventually became theΒ βfairy god brotherβ whoβd build a bridge between me and M. From the 5th of April onwards, we have been communicating. Poor him had to go the process of getting to know an anti-social, friendly but very shy person. I told myself i should take chances too. And itβs not like meeting new people is a bad thing either. And so we have been hanging out, eating carbs and watching movies. Weβd walk around, sharing stories and talking about random topics.. not thinking about anything else but theΒ βnowβ. I think that is why i liked going out with him too.. he is very open to my inconsistency and my shyness. He doesnβt feel (or so he says) awkward that i do not talk too much.Β
It is risky for me and pretty hard to open up, due to my past experiences. It is very hard. I promised myself to focus on work, and in giving my family - my mom especially, the comfort she deserves. I do not want to break that promise. I can see i have progress with my life too. I have found the full-time accounting job i have been waiting and wanting for -- Eden Joi S. Hora, Staff Accountant at Destination Residences Hawaii, under the Hyatt Corporation.Β
Next to my agenda is learning to drive and park more confidently, and getting that full-driverβs license. THEN i buy a car.Β
What has been pushing me do all these things? Myself. I want to be happy, i want to give my mom happiness and stability. I want to give myself comfort and inner peace. I deserve these too. And maybe it is M who has been inspiring me also.. heβs nothing but a rainbow in my dark days, that green flash i didnβt expect to see.. heβs that sweetness and addictiveΒ βthingβ like ice cream and shaved ice. He has been a great companion and sweetheart. Thereβs still much to know about him and i am letting him become a part of my days and life. It might take a while before a fully let him invade my toxic life though, but i am ready for the challenge. I am not afraid for the struggle anymore.
Maybe itβs him..
Maybe itβs just me..
Or maybe it is the universe.. this time. :)
