I Want You Around
Word Count: 3,472 (Come through LENGTH)
Rating: M for Mature - mentions of potential cheating & sexual activity! Also cussing & some drama.
A/N: It’s been MONTHS since I gave yall anything & I am so sorry yall! But like always I'm back like I never left and I bring you all this! It’s a bit fluffy which yall know I usually don't do but I was in my feelings when I started it LOL. I hope you all enjoy it and let me know what you think as always. Love you guys.
** Please let me know of any spelling or punctuation errors. **
Tag Squad Assemble: NONE AT THIS TIME! Let me know if you’d like to be tagged :)
Title is based off this song: YUGYEOM - I Want U Around ft. DeVita
♚❤ - We’ll have to take a rain check on our date baby girl.
You don't even bother to respond to the text.
“Yet again he’s gotten my hopes up only to crush them and leave me disappointed and frustrated. Why is it that every time we plan a night together, something suddenly comes up that no one else can handle for a fucking night?!”
You know how your man is. Roman’s a very hands on person in everything he does - especially when it comes to his business, his money - his family.
He isn’t so vain to the point where money rules his every move but it is how he makes things happen and bodies move.
In the end, money is the root of all evil and he’s no exemption.
So anytime a problem arises he personally oversees it to make sure it's resolved properly and immediately. But still, despite knowing that you wished that he’d give it to someone else to handle for one damn night so he could spend time with you.
You look down, simply reading over the words a few more times before rolling your eyes and growling out loud. Swiping down, you bring up your pull down menu and hit do not disturb before tossing the phone off to the side and getting up off your bed.
You were so excited for tonight.
It had been weeks since you had last seen your man. He’s been away on business overseas establishing yet another branch of his ever growing empire. He had called you a few days ago to tell you that he was coming home and to clear your calendar and call into work for a few days. He had plans to spend a few days holed up with you in your penthouse apartment, just relaxing and laying around with you.
And while that sounded absoultley devine, you also wanted to add dessert; the cherry on top and planned to wine and dine your man with a home cooked meal, a nice vintage wine, a few candles and a very racey red number with fuck me heels; just how he liked it.
But yet again you were left alone and upset.
Getting up from your bed, you turn towards your ensuite bathroom ready to wipe your makeup but look off to the side where your phone lies. You simply look at it for a moment before reaching out and plucking it up. You hit the contacts icon, scrolling for no more than a second before finding the contact you want and press ‘call’.
After a single ring, the person picks up ...
You simply sigh before taking a large sip of the chilled white wine you had ordered. You sigh at the taste. Looking around the small bistro, you take in the dim yet soft glow of the lights and the deep bass of the melody drifting through the air as you sit at the bar.
“So this is the umpteenth time he’s canceled on you for business?”
Looking over the rim of your glass to where your best friend sat, you simply nod and bring the glass from your lips.
“I understand business comes first but still… don't I matter too? What about how I feel? Why can't he let Jey or Heyman handle whatever it is for just one goddamn night?”
Natacha simply gives you a sad smile.
“Have you tried to tell him how you feel?”
“That's pretty hard when he’s never around. I don't want to have this talk over the phone, and especially not over text. It seems like a face to face thing you know? I don't want to sound needy, but I am. I miss him. I feel bad for even having these feelings because I knew what it was when I got with him. But still, I get lonely too.”
“Nah I got you babe. But still if this is a recurring thing then maybe you should say something before that feeling gets any worse.”
You simply nod.
It’s not like you haven't thought about telling him about it, but it's your pride. You don't want to seem… well needy - clingy even. You've seen some of the women his men bring around and can't help but shudder at even remotely sounding like them even if it was justified.
No hate towards those girls but you’re a different breed of woman. You don’t need his attention 24/7. You understand that he has other things he needs to focus on and that's okay but when you want his attention, you want his attention.
“You shouldn't feel bad for feeling how you feel. You're allowed to be upset that he canceled on you yet again for business after promising to spend time with you. But I do think you need to tell him how you feel. Yeah he's the boss and has an empire to run but he's also in a relationship with you. You deserve some of his time and attention too. And if he can't give you that then he needs to let you be with someone who will.”
Natcha loves Roman like a brother, she really does but she also hates to see you upset and hurt. And she hates it even more when Roman is the cause.
“Nat you know I love him. I’m not leaving him over this. Like you said I definitely need to talk to him and explain how I feel. I just hope I don't come off as whiny and clingy.”
Rolling her eyes, Nat reaches for her drink and takes a sip before piercing you with an annoyed glare.
“And if you do, so fucking what? You are lonely! And it’s his fault so let him fix it and make it up to you.”
You simply laugh at your friend.
You go to give a witty remark and stop short at what you see in front of you… Well not a what but a who.
In all his glory was your boyfriend, in a dark pressed suit looking every bit the mob boss he is - walking into the bistro with not only his cousin Jey, and special counsel Paul at his flanks but his ex fiance Galina Rose on his arm. You simply fall silent at the sight. You don't take your eyes off of the group as they literally make a beeline to the right of the restaurant where the private rooms and booths are housed.
Having noticed your silence, Nat must have turned to see what caught your attention and fell silent alongside you having seen what you did.
You wanted to be reasonable about this, you really did but your mind and heart were having none of it. Disappointment, loneliness and unbridled anger swept through you making you see red and itch to slap the shit out of someone.
You didn’t even realize it but you hopped off the stool you were perched on and began to move towards where you saw the group disappear. As you move you somewhat take note of everyone in the bistro seemingly staring at you in curisoity as you make your way to the other side of the bistro where they, your boyfriend, his inner circle and fucking ex were now concealed.
…
Unknown - No matter how many times you change your number, you know I’ll get it. We need to talk.
You simply delete the message and go back to watching youtube and eating your popcorn.
You were done.
You sat around like a puppy, waiting up for this man for weeks just for him to cancel on you last minute and step out the same night with his fucking ex. As far as you were concerned you saw all you needed to realize she was who he was occupying his time with the last few weeks.
And he could continue to do so.
Initially you wanted to beat his ass then hers, but Natacha had talked you down, telling you that violence would do nothing and you were better than that.
‘Look, you’ve seen what you need to see. So don't stoop to their level. Be better. Let's get out of here and go to my place. You can stay with me for a few days.’
You were glad that Nat let you stay with her because after a day or so of you ignoring him Roman showed up to your place and found it void of your presence. After calling your family and being told they hadnt heard from you, he called Nat asking about your whereabouts only to get cussed the fuck out on behalf of you.
‘You piece of fucking shit! How could you do that to her?! She was so excited to see you then you cancel in the name of work only to step out with your fucking ex where everyone could see you without a fucking care in the world! That bitch legit was eating up the moment and you looked mighty comfy with her. Y/n is better than me cause no one would have stopped me from whopping both of yall asses! …’
You werent going to play second fiddle to any bitch especially his ex.
Of course Roman wanted to talk, but you had heard enough of his excuses and told him that much before you changed your number. That was almost a month ago.
You were surprised he had lasted this long. Roman wasn't a man to be told no or denied anything so knowing him you figured he would have come to your place and made you talk to him sooner rather than later.
But then again apparently he’s been busy with the acquisition of yet another company and some family business. Jimmy, Jey’s twin brother, had been texting you and letting you know what was happening with the family despite your issues with his cousin and leader. You might be mad at him, but his family was another story. They werent in control of his actions and Jim let you know Roman's father had told him to stay away from Galina when she started popping back up, but of course Roman brushed his father off.
‘Pops told Ro that nothing good would come from her showing back up but you and I know that he will always see about her regardless of the damage she caused.’ And as much as it pained you to admit, that was true. Galina was his first love. His first in many ways. Despite just how much of a snake and bitch she was, he still had a soft spot for her, which made you even angrier yet sad.
After she got up and left him almost 3 years ago because of what he did for a living and the danger she said he posed to her family and herself, she damn sure picked a hell of a time to come back when it seemed he was climbing even higher.
Yet again that was his fault, well yours too because to the public he was well, single. Yeah no one outside of the family and Nat knew you were his girlfriend, well ex-girlfriend.
When you first got with him, Roman had asked you to keep your relationship out of the public eye. After what you learned of his breakup with her, you knew Galina had cut him deep and made him feel bad for his profession and lifestyle despite knowing about it from the start! Not only was she the many if not all of his firsts in life, they were childhood friends. Her family wasn't in the mafia but did dealings with Romans father so they knew what was happening in the shadows.
At the time you wanted to show him you were a different woman and agreed to go at his pace. But it came back to bite you in your ass and you feel like such a fool because of it.
Turning on the TV and seeing the man you loved being plastered everywhere with his ex made you nauseous and sad. But after a few weeks you realized that maybe that's who he wanted this entire time. Maybe you werent his endgame the way he was for you ...
Rolling your eyes, you simply look back to your screen as the doorbell sounds once again. You simply keep your eyes trained on the screen with no intention of moving from your spot. After all he was going to find a way in regardless of whether you let him in or not so you might as well enjoy your peace a bit longer before he comes to disturb it.
After a moment you can hear the keys on your door keypad being pushed then the lock clicks letting him in.
Your heart beats in double time with the knowledge that he’s inside your apartment after a month. It’s been well over a month since you’ve seen him face to face. Well actually well over 4 months but who was counting?
“I told you we needed to talk.”
You don't look away from the screen.
“I thought my silence was clear enough. I don't have anything to say to you.”
“I think you do baby girl. Why don't we talk about it, hmm?”
Sighing you reach for the remote next to you, pausing the TV. Not bothering to acknowledge him or his statement, you grab the bowl with your popcorn and stand, making your way to your kitchen, pushing past him.
His deep laugh sounds behind you as he turns to follow you. You simply place the bowl on the counter as you go over to your refrigerator, open it and grab a bottle of water.
“You’re allowed to be upset, I wouldn't hold that against you. But I would like a chance to explain my side.”
You keep your back to him as you open and take a sip of the cold water. You take a moment to swallow before speaking.
“Then go ahead and explain. Please do and once youre done leave me the fuck alone.”
“Turn around and tell me to my face to leave you the fuck alone. Go on baby. Turn around and let me see that pretty face.”
After a few seconds of silence you make no move to turn around. Hearing his laugh, you squeeze the water bottle in your fist tightly, almost spilling all the water in it on the counter.
“You’re mad, I get that. But we both know that I would never do you dirty like that. I know you better than you know yourself baby girl. You really think I would leave you here alone to globe trot with my ex? Yeah I’ll admit I fucked up by doing what I did. I take full responsibility but I’d never disrespect you or hurt you by sleeping with her or anyone else. Yeah I have a soft spot for her but my heart belongs to you. I belong to you. And I have been a shit man for not showing you that lately.”
You don’t even try to dispute him because he’s right.
“Yes I canceled on you to meet up with her but her father as well. Galina’s father owes a lot of money to an international arms dealer. The dealer sought me out to help with the issue of payment since Galina’s father is a part of my network and this is my city. Of course I had stipulations for the meeting to take place, one of them being me being present. The meeting wasn’t supposed to happen for a few days, hence why I told you to clear your calendar. But when I got word that the dealer was in the city ahead of the meeting I couldn't ignore it. So I moved the meeting to that night, the night of our date.
I know you were looking forward to our night, and so was I but I couldn't let his actions go unnoticed.”
“Okay, let's say I get why you did what you did, do you realize that you’ve canceled on me god knows how many times in favor of work? You do realize that I have been here for months waiting for my man to give me one night of his undivided attention?! How the fuck do you think I feel seeing you with her after you promised to come home and spend time with me? I’m not a jealous person but I can't help but feel some type of way knowing that she and her father are somewhat more important than me, the woman you say you love. But I keep forgetting that she’s important to you too no matter how much I wish she wasn't.”
“No one means more to me than you.”
“You have a funny way of showing it.”
“Mmmm …”
You keep your back to him as you stew in your feelings. But after a moment you feel his hands on your waist and his chest on your back.
“You want me to show you then baby? You want a crash course in just how fucking much you mean to me?”
Closing your eyes, you breathe through your nose and try to press yourself forwards towards the counter in an attempt to get out of his hold, but you know it’s no use.
Now that his hands are on you, he’s not letting go.
“Listen to me and listen to me, good baby girl. Matter of fact -”
Before you realize it, he’s spun you around to face him, grabbing your waist and hoisting you up to place you on the counter. He’s wedged between your legs leaving no space between your bodies and his thumb and forefinger of his left hand have your chin trapped between them.
“Pay attention to me. Listen, look - acknowledge what I am telling you. Yes, I fucked up as I said. I have been doing that alot lately but for you to think that she is more important than you is ridiculous. Yes, I loved her, and I still care for her but you gave me something she never did which hurts me to say. I thought she was my endgame, my wife, my future but then you came into my life and I have never felt so loved and appreciated. You don't care about my fame or money. You care about me, the man. You give me what I need without me having to say a damn word. You understand me and make me feel less alone in this cold world. And because of my actions, I’ve made you feel so unappreciated and unloved and for that I am sorry. I am sorry that it took this to make me realize that I have an amazing woman who deserves nothing less than the world. I want to be that man for you. I want to be able to give you what your heart desires.”
You don't realize that you're crying until you feel his fingers on your skin, caressing your tears away.
“Don't cry beautiful. You’ve done enough of that because of me. I hate seeing you cry.”
“Then stop making me cry!”
His smile is breathtaking at your words. Scanning you from head to toe, he reaches up to let your unruly hair down out of the messy top bun you have it in to let it fall down around your shoulders.
“I’ve missed you.”
At his words he leans forward to bury his face in the crook of your neck, bringing his arms around your frame and relaxing into you. You waste no time and reach up, doing what he had done pulling his luscious locks free from his signature bun and running your fingers across his scalp earning a low growl from him.
The sound sends a shiver down your spine making you wiggle on the counter and against him.
“Soon baby, soon. But first I want you to know that I solved the issue with Galinas father, and the debt was paid. I shouldn’t have another issue with him. I made it a point to let him know what will happen next time he tries to duck out of a business deal with my name attached to it.
I also made it clear to Galina that we will never be what we used to be. I care for her but I love you. I belong to and with you. After that night I realized nothing should ever make me put you on the back burner. You’re my queen, my partner. There is no me without you. The man I am now is because of you. You gave me what I was missing in this life. It’s me and you against the world, always.”
“Always.”
You simply pull him closer to you, relishing in his embrace.