“buck –” HE STOOD UP FROM THE bed, and moved away from it. his throat was tight and he passed a hand over his face in anxiety. he couldn’t look at him, that was a given fact. he was avoiding it. he was avoiding any, and all, eye contact with the other man. with his friend. once more ( always more? ) but that was before. before the fall, before the plane, before the aliens, the brainwashing, the fighting, the shields, the superheros —STEVE SWALLOWED AND shook his head. as if he was denying what james said to him, denying that he was still in love with him. “no,” he verbalized it. confirming that he was rejecting the idea, rejecting the notion. “no, you were in love with someone else.” his throat burned, he could feel the thump thump thump in his wrists of his heartbeat, pushing blood too fast through his veins as if it was begging him not to say what he was SAYING. “you were in love with a skinny kid from brooklyn, too dumb to run away from a fight. he’s not…”HE FINALLY CAST HIS gaze towards him, but only at his knees. he wouldn’t look at his face. as if he was – ashamed? “he’s not here anymore, buck.”