Reflection 4: “Constructing Masculinity”
Once society hears the word masculinity, the first thing that pops up into their head would be DOMINANCE. The real question we should ask ourselves is, is dominance something men want, or society wants men to want? As soon as we’re born into this world, we are taught to perform and behave a certain way. This reading mentions how masculinity comes in different forms depending on how an individual views it. For example, a stay home dad could love and take care of his children a lot even though that is expected to be the mom’s “role.” Nature and nurture play a big role with masculinity because even though men are biologically born the way they are, the environment and individuals they are surrounded by pressure them to be a “man” and pressure them to follow certain stereotypes. Hyper masculinity creates fear in men into expressing their emotions in which they pretend to be somebody they’re not. They are expected to be bigger, stronger, faster or they are seen less as a man. They would be considered “feminine.” They’re expected to be these emotionless, muscular, and bread making robots and we wonder why men are like this in today’s society. There are many things men do just to look “manly.” For example, the article stated how men catcalling is not because they expect the woman to look back and have sex with them, but they actually perform this kind of behavior in front of other men to look “cool” because it’s a “guy” thing. If a man doesn’t check out a good looking girl on the street and cat call her, they would most likely be called gay. Not only that, men use the word “gay” not to offend someone’s sexuality necessarily, but to remind themselves that they need to be a certain way in which being gay is the worst thing you could ever be called to them. This reading stated, “A woman is made, not born.” I also believe, “A man is made, not born.” Society made us and didn’t give us a choice to be who we want to be without threatening us that we’d be looked down on. In order for men to express their emotions and end the fear in them, society has to cooperate. If men aren’t what the stereotypes want them to be, they have to face sexual rejection, social ostracism, and job discrimination. In order for them to be the best, they even involve drugs into it which leads to many suicides. It’s saddening that we’re pressured to be somebody we’re not just to please others, when they’ll never be pleased. Women can be skinny, and they’re called “bones.” Women could be thick and they’re considered “too fat.” The same thing goes with men. No matter what we do, society will always expect more from us which is why for once, we should live for ourselves and be happy with who we are. Any sex, any gender, any race, any color, any status, should be able to be happy with themselves without being looked down. Stereotypes is only a part of our life if we’ve accepted it and “normalized” it to be a part of our lives and who we are. Masculinity and Femininity shouldn’t be a performance, it should be a choice.
