Notes- hey guys! I have this very unfinished patd essay and wanted to post chapters of it on here its a deep dive but I could definitely go deeper just very busy :< for storage reasons I'm posting writing blogs here now!!
We are all merely born blobs shaped and molded by the world around us. We take the shape of whatever we see, we mirror the earth that is reflected in our eyes, some follow this meanwhile others fight it, fighting turns into anger, anger turns into distaste, till eventually our shape contorts and we become our own sculpture.
Along with that lots of times sculptures are left with impurities bestowed upon by a root cause, the artist. Ryan was/is no exception to this analogy. Throughout numerous interviews you see this annoyance Ryan has for his girl fans making misogynistic remarks in regards to them, this could be a deep rooted belief brought on by his upbringing, what he witnessed online or something else either way it's not something to ignore.
Way too many fans downright ignore his old behaviour but for now that is all that will be mentioned on that whole topic since it deserves a bigger spot in another paragraph but I think it's worth being aware of that when discussing future events in panics A fever you can’t sweat out era.
In Las Vegas Nevada, on the 30th of August 1986 a brilliant boy child named George Ryan Ross the 3rd would be born to unfortunate circumstances. With a name like that you can see why he changed it to a more rockstar shortened version.
Ryan's love for music was started/amplified after being gifted a guitar at 12 years old. Ryan and his childhood best friends would go on to form in the spring of 2004 Panic at the disco, which came about in the suburban area of Summerlin.
Ryan was on vocals, lyrics and guitar, meanwhile Brent was on bass and Spencer on drums. Ryan’s father George Hammond Ross Jr was an ex marine and described by Ryan himself as an abusive alcoholic.
Kerrang 2006 and other sources state that when Ryan was young his parents divorced. Ryan having little to no contact with his 2 half brothers or mother, his mother being even described as negligent leaving Ryan to deal with his father.
When asked later on in life Ryan described his childhood as “fucking hellish” but even as a tween/teen he would often share personal intimate details on forums such as livejournal.
(Kerrang 2006)
In the same article it mentions how Ryan's father sent him to a private catholic prep school working hard to give him the education he was never given.
Despite being at a catholic school Ryan himself was an atheist and still is. Ryan's father was always dead set on him going to college which would quickly come true and just as quickly be thrown away, remember I said that for later.
Ryan quickly realised he was unable to relate to his wealthy classmates, helping his angst and displeasure fester.
(Kerrang 2006)
Ryan did well in school especially reading and writing and this is shown in the brilliance of afyscos lyrics.
Throughout Ryan's livejournal we can see a vibrant history of his poetic abilities with different rants about his home life, favourite bands, heartache, dislike for others, dissatisfaction with the world and illusive mysterious short stories providing an insight on his mind.
Just like everyone else he complained about mundane things like being fined for speeding in Brent's stuck up rich neighbourhood or the dramatics of online incels. In 2004 he began talking about Panic, alongside annoyed fueled rants and yearning cries.
One irritated statement posted in 2004 being “It's almost cute how all you kids think you know so much shit about politics, since you all love to follow trends, bush is the new kerry.
I'm tired of hearing how it's the end of the world, stop being so dramatic your life will not be affected by this.” This was referring to George W. Bush and his running mate, incumbent Vice President Dick Cheney, being elected to a second term.
(Ryan's live journal)
As stated in 2004 he began promoting a lot more, even posing in scandalous shoots showing off his v-line and buns of steel inside tight scene jeans in the hopes teenagers would check out panic’s site.
Anywayyy, Panic was actually a blink 182 cover band before becoming their own thing since Ryan and Spencer were massive blink fans (Ryan especially).
Ryan's email was even blinkexists182 as mentioned by Pete Wentz in an interview with Mark Hoppus (Blink-182's vocalist) and also seen in different screenshots.
Ryan in general was a major blink fan, in 2005 stating just how much he missed his heroes saying “Blink, I will miss you dearly this band alone is the reason I play music now. Tom Delonge (blink 182’s guitarist) will always be my biggest influence and best hero.”
(Ryan's live journal)
Before I continue I should talk about the fact Ryan and Spencer did have a teenage garage band before Panic.
This band was started by Ryan and Spencer in 9th grade. Later on gaining Brent Wilson, then another teen boy named Trevor. This other band was Pet Salamander which was eventually renamed to the summer league, consisting of Brent Wilson (15), Spencer Smith (15), Trevor Howell (?), and Ryan Ross (16) and you can still see snippets of the band's old website.
Each boy wrote their own “introduction” with a lot of sexual references, mentioning banging/hitting on mums, homosexulaity, how hot each of them think they are, girls, and making fun of each other “gayness”. Brent's introduction is especially strange/sexual, talking about his private regions, how good he is in bed and doing Ryan's dog.
Spencers is just as strange rattling on about Brent's brother trying to get with him (and how he likes it), how he cross-dresses and wants to “do” Brent's mum and dog. Ryan mentions his lack of a girlfriend (and search for one) and like in everyone else's passages calls the others gay.
Yet along with these teen immature intros some member's favourite bands and things to do are listed.
(Ryan's favourite bands)
Sadly some of these bands aren't easily accessible but I would recommend checking out the starting line; they are quite similar to Blink-182.
(Spencers favourite bands)
Their favourite bands all had interchangeable sounds. Bands like Blink, nofx, new flound glory etc all having similar punk rock/pop type sounds (except jackson five?).
You can imagine the band sounded similar to acts like these based on the boys' fashion choices and the lyrics that will be shown in a minute
(All of the boys pet salamander intros)
Shortly after pet salamander/the summer league Brent ended up transferring to Brendon's school leading to Brent introducing him to the others.
Also no one's quite sure where Trever faded to im guessing he just left and that was it as most teenage bands are. Additionally I want to bring up that even though the summer league did have some songs they are sadly now impossible to acces with no one being able to retrieve them.
(Panic fan discussing demos, proof of more demos that sadly can't be retrieved)
2006
Despite the actual songs being unretrievable, as I said the lyrics are. The lyrics are good but are a far cry from afysco with more angst and pubescent dread. But it's still good with a catchy ring to it.
It really does show the insane trajectory of Ryan's lyricism and difference in what he wrote about. Starting out as fun anti authority mumble to masterful satirical chuck palanuck reminiscent comedy, mature and poetic beauty.
(The summer leagues song lyrics)
(By the way, you can still check out pet salamenders website, I'd definitely check out the pictures even if some of them can't be retrieved, funny enough Ryan's email is there once again).
