Here you stand, the perfect symbol of our technical society. Mechanised, electronicised, and not very human. You've done away with humanity, the striving of man to achieve greatness through his own resources.
It was last week when I watched The Conscience of the King, and I saved these lines because I found them interesting, particularly in relation to McCoy.
(Obviously, many people have probably said the following before and better, but I kind of need this in my own words. And you know what, approach this as a heavy headcanon territory lol as some random rambling... I also feel like half of this only makes sense if you live in my head, but well... I did write it so I could come back to it whenever I need)
McCoy is the most human, most compassionate person on the Enterprise. He’s the one who connects both Spock and Kirk to their humanity, to their emotions, in different ways and degree. Spock, who struggles between logic and emotions, and Kirk who struggles between what command demands and emotions/his self. *
And it’s not surprising that it’s McCoy who distrusts technology, the basis of their whole society. It is McCoy who is afraid that machines will erase people’s humanity and rob them of their identity.
Spock: You're the Captain of this ship. You haven't the right to be vulnerable in the eyes of the crew. You can't afford the luxury of being anything less than perfect. If you do, they lose faith, and you lose command.
Kirk cannot afford to be too human, vulnerable, soft. And sometimes, McCoy needs to remind him.
Spock, too, thinks he cannot afford to be too human, and sometimes, McCoy needs to needle him, make him question himself.
---
Spock and Kirk can’t act as confidants to one another. Not in a long run and not during the five-year mission.
Kirk needs McCoy to talk to, he needs McCoy’s compassion and emotions and feelings that aren’t hidden. Spock cannot give him the right emotional support McCoy can.
Spock needs McCoy to challenge his views, he needs him because he can freely argue with him with almost zero consequences. Spock cannot have this interaction, the needed kind of interaction, with Kirk due to the power imbalance thanks to their ranks (plus Vulcan duty and loyalty to a commander). And McCoy’s approach is what can actually get under his skin, something softer can’t.
---
* this is why, imho, Spock can accept Kirk’s friendship easier than McCoy’s. It’s easier for Spock to accept that Kirk is a human who struggles in a similar way as Spock. (The Enemy Within serves as a good example.) Friendship with Kirk can be explained by logic - it’s a mix of duty, loyalty, professional relationship, admiration.
But McCoy is different, too human, too emotional, confusing, yet the difference keeps Spock interested - and by Amok Time, McCoy becomes one of his closest friends. Yet, it’s harder for him to explain that relationship with logic the same way it can be done with Kirk. (and that’s why Spock acts the way he does in Bread and Circuses after he saves McCoy’s life)
Even though, he probably does have some sort of a logical explanation available, eventually, for the peace of his mind:
However, Doctor, you must remember I am entirely motivated by logic. The loss of our ship's surgeon, whatever I think of his skill, would mean a reduction in the efficiency of the Enterprise and therefore... (sure)
Allow me to point out that a first officer is more expendable than either a doctor or a captain.
I cant stop myself. Hopefully one day I will escape this Chocobros ABO Au obsession but today is not that day.
On the plus side it’s good writing practice! Not to tag @weebsinstash everytime but it was their idea that kickstarted my mild obsession. Last time I promise!
F!reader and Ignis. orgasm denial, fingering, controlling/manipulative/aggressive behaviour
“Are you lost my dear?” The voice surprises you and you let out a squeak, much to your embarrassment, as you turn towards the man who had appeared at your side. Partially hidden by the shadows, you catch a glimpse of reddish-violet hair and amber eyes staring intently back at you.
“No I’m fine, thank you”. He continues to stare, his eyes narrowing as they sweep over you, head tilting to the side as he examines you. Just as you start to trip over awkward into uncomfortable he nods. “Enjoy your evening my dear,” he tips his black fedora towards you, “Farewell for now” You watch him walk away and disappear in the direction of the hotel before you continue your journey further into the town.
A foolish stumble while packing up the tent after the boys’ last hunt had left you with a beautiful purple bruise across your knee and a myriad of minor aches and pains. Gladio and Ignis had become unbearable with their attention afterwards, refusing to let you carry or do anything other than sit and watch as they packed up.
This meant that asking if you could go explore the town you were all currently staying in had been met with an immediate no. Gladio responding before you had even finished the question.
Thankfully Noctis and Prompto had also wanted to go explore and with some gentle persuasion from Ignis, Gladio had relented under the provision that the three of you stayed together.
You hadn’t meant to end up on your own, but it hadn’t been long before the two younger alphas got distracted by their phones, and to avoid getting drawn into their bickering over whether or not Prompto had managed to cheat in King’s Knight you had turned away to admire a shop window and when you turned back they had gone.
Your panic had been brief, you knew the way back to the hotel, it was a safe town, and best of all; you were finally alone. You could relax, you could explore, you could try some new cuisine, maybe meet some new people, and head back to the hotel later. You knew you were going to get a telling off for this, but the excitement of doing something just for yourself overrode it. Besides you didn’t technically wander off. Noct and Prompto did.
The sun was just beginning to set by the time you decided to head back to the hotel, staying out perhaps a little later than you intended.
As you round the corner to the hotel you bump into the man from earlier coming from the opposite direction. He grabs your waist to stop your stumble and although he says nothing he smiles at your apology. His scent is strong but strangely bland and you can’t help the shiver of unease as he lets you go but doesn’t move away. “Sorry“ you repeat, but he doesn’t reply, just watches you with those unnerving amber eyes as you quickly step away.
As you enter the hotel you are immediately hit with an angry bark of your name. Looking across the lobby to see Gladio stalking towards you and Prompto looking worried behind him. The look changing to obvious relief when he locks eyes with you.
Gladio says nothing as he reaches you, other than a continuous low warning growl that has you momentarily freezing in alarm. He obviously doesn’t appreciate your reaction and the grip on your arm as he drags you towards the rooms is painful.
His scent a confusing mix of anger, concern and something tangy you can’t identify.
He pushes you into your shared room and you stumble, rubbing your arm where he had been holding you.
“You do not wander off alone.” His words are almost a snarl and your alarm evolves into a tinge of fear “You do not talk to other alphas”
“I didn’t ta-“ He cuts you off with a low growl “you reek of other alphas”.
You’re not sure what to say to that and are pretty sure anything you say will just incense him further so you keep silent. Avoiding his gaze you glance at Prompto who offers you a weak smile.
“You look at me” Gladio steps into your line of sight and you force yourself not to shrink back at his glare. “You will stay in this room until I come back”.
You scoff, “I’m not a chi-“
“you will stay in this room” it’s a command. This wasn’t the first time Gladio had used the creepy alpha voice trick on you, though it was the first time it had ever been spoken in such anger. The command shot through your chest like lava, a whirling line of heat that spread up to the back of the skull and threatened to give you a major migraine if you tried to disobey. You felt angry tears start to well up in response and tried to blink them away. This was unfair. This was unfair bullshit. But you kept your mouth shut; arguing now would not end well for you.
“Yes, alpha.” You hissed. You saw Prompto flinch slightly at your tone, but Gladio didn’t react, other than to turn and leave the room, tugging Prompto with him before closing the door with a slam.
You stand there in the middle of the room for a few minutes, frustration and tears threatening to overwhelm you. Trying to keep yourself from breaking down you sit on the edge of the bed, spending a few minutes angrily tugging the sheets and pillows off so you can cocoon yourself underneath them.
The knock at the door startles you before Ignis steps inside. As he stands there you notice the tenseness in his shoulders and you mentally resign yourself to another lecture. The way he scans over your little pile of blankets seems to amuse him and causes the irritation in your chest to flare back to life.
You snarl as Ignis steps towards your bed, and he stops, surprise flitting across his face before he gently smiles at you. “You look nice and cosy in there, you did a good job”.
The praise instantly has a ball of warmth flooding your chest, even before you fully comprehend his words. Did a good job at what?
“Can I join you?” You nod reluctantly and he sits on the edge of the bed next to you. He watches you silently for a couple of minutes and you feel a tinge of guilt.
“I’m sorry”
Ignis looks unimpressed at your words. “Noctis told you to stay with him did he not?”
“But –“
“I know this is still a confusing time for you, but Noctis is our pack leader, you need to listen to him, he knows, we all know, what’s best for you”
“I didn’t wander off” your rebuff comes out more petulant than you wanted and Ignis sighs.
“You are our omega darling; we are only looking out for you”
You forget that sometimes, that Noctis is the pack leader. A little too bratty, a little too immature for the reality of him being an Alpha, and the pack leader, to stick in your head.
“How do you think Noctis felt when he looked back and you weren’t there?”
You frown, how does he think you felt? When Gladio grabbed you by the arm hard enough to leave bruises? Commanded you to stay like a misbehaving dog?
The anger starts to bubble inside you again but before you can reply Ignis continues, “You could have got hurt, or worse” a slow quiet purr coming from him as he strokes a hand over your head. “There are Alphas out there who wouldn’t be as kind as us if they realised you were an Omega” His words send a chill down your spine as you remembered the stranger outside the hotel. Ignis senses your shift in mood and his purr gets a little louder, trying to comfort you “We can’t protect you if you leave us darling” nails scratch lightly across your scalp and you relax further “promise me you won’t go off on your own again”
“I di-“ Your protest dies on your lips at Ignis disappointed look and you look away. His purr having the desired effect as you feel the fight start to drain out of you “I promise”
He hums, happy at your, albeit reluctant, submission and continues to stroke your hair. It’s soothing and the comfort starts to turn your irritation into guilt.
“Will you tell Noct I’m sorry?”
Ignis relaxes slightly at your words but doesn’t agree to your request. “You can tell him yourself in the morning”
“Is Gladio still angry at me?” You feel on the verge of tears again
“No darling, He worries about you,” a soft kiss to your brow, “I worry about you,” another to the tip of your nose, “we all do” he murmurs softly, finally brushing his lips to yours but pulling away before you can reciprocate.
You stay like that for a while, relaxed and drowsy as Ignis continues to purr and stroke your hair.
“Are you still sore from this morning?” his questions startles you out of your doze and you nod in reply. "Get undressed."
There’s a pause, a moment of silence where you’re not sure you heard him right.
“What?”
“Get undressed” he repeats. “A massage and some relaxation will do you the world of good.”
It didn’t take long for you to agree. Although a little off kilter with the abrupt change of topic and the lack of a real reprimand you still eagerly accept his offer. Even as you continued to unknowingly step further in to the role of Ignis’ omega, you still came second to his duty to Noctis and getting his undivided attention and one of his massages was not something you could refuse.
As you stand and start to remove your clothes Ignis begins to rearrange your cocoon of blankets which causes you a small confusing flare of distress.
He notices and turns back to look at you, “we can rebuild it later”
The ‘we’ makes you happy for some reason and you can’t decipher the emotion that flickers across Ignis face at your happy chirp. You still hate the noises you make, the involuntary purrs, chirps and growls that escape you despite your best efforts.
Ignoring your disobeying body you focus on removing your clothes.
Once in your underwear you stop, watching him as his eyes roam over you, gaze filled with approval and appreciation. You fight the urge to turn and hide yourself from his eyes. Ignis’ love of seeing you in lingerie always left you feeling more than a little self conscious.
Finally he speaks, “you can remove your bra” again fighting the urge to hide you stand there as his gaze lingers across your bare breasts before glancing over the finger marks Gladio had left on your upper arm. He doesn’t comment, instead steps towards you and brings a gloved hand up to your mouth, letting his fingers rest lightly against your bottom lip. You know what he wants and you oblige him. Nipping the end of his glove between your teeth, you resist the temptation to take his fingers into your mouth and instead help him remove his glove, before doing the same with the other.
Ignis takes half a step back and lets his eyes roam over you again, taking you in. A smile flickers across his face as he takes a breath in, scenting you, before it morphs into flash of distaste. Gone before you can question him he gestures towards the bed
“Lie down, on your front”
Once you are settled Ignis starts a slow soft rhythm with his fingers, running up your spine, across the nape of your neck and back down. He leans forward to kiss a soft spot between your shoulder blades before his fingers start to firmly knead down your back and spine. The pain and pleasure mixing until you feel yourself start to relax beneath his hands, as the knots and aches loosen.
He continues this for a while, until your moans and sighs of painful pleasure turn into quiet sleepy whimpers.
He kisses your neck. "turn over for me darling," he whispers pressing further kisses against your skin as he draws back again, watching you as you turn to lie on your back.
His pupils fully blown, a deep dark void as he stares at you like he wants to devour you has your pressing your thighs tighter in an effort to relieve the sudden rush of arousal.
“You’d look so good in a blindfold, black silk across your eyes,” his finger brushes gently over your cheekbone, “would you let me?” His voice, dark and velvety makes you moan a shiver run through you and hips rocking forward before you can stop them. He doesn’t seem to mind your lack of a verbal answer, content to watch his hand trail down over your breasts, carefully avoiding your nipples and coming to rest on your thigh.
You automatically open your legs at his touch, and he acquiesces to your unspoken request with a quiet hum, grazing fingers over your panties and down between your legs in a slow barely there caress. His movement is painfully slow, and your attempt to move your hips to hurry him along has him tsking at you, his free hand pressing down on your stomach to stop you moving.
It’s just enough to tease you. The way his finger languidly rubs against your clit through your panties. No rush, no real pressure, Just enough to have a tease of pleasure start to build tortuously slow within you.
You arch your back and grind your hips, trying to get him to move faster, to touch you harder and his movement immediately ceases. You whimper in frustration as he withdraws his fingers, his hand stroking up over your body, leaning in to press soft gentles kisses up your stomach to just under your breasts. He avoids your nipples, avoids the little sensitive patch on your collarbone and bites sharply on the lobe of your ear. “Stay Still”
Once he deems you suitably still and calm he slips his hand back down between your legs and resumes stroking you through the fabric, drawing breathy moans and whimpers from you. He touches you nowhere but against your covered clit, and it’s maddening. Every time you try to reach for him or move closer he stops.
Ignis works you up closer to the edge again and again, each time stopping before you can come. With each denied orgasm you became more desperate, and as he brings you to the edge for the fifth time, you begin to tearfully plead with him.
"Please, Ignis," you beg, you were close to tears, your orgasm was steadily building again, and this time you were pretty sure you were going to die if he didn’t let you come. He leans up, his fingers still circling your clit, and kisses your mouth softly.
"You're going to be a good girl?" He asks and you nod frantically, “going to listen to us? He presses harder against your clit, “going to do as we tell you?”
" yes, yes, I promise," you cry out with a moan.
You were right on the edge, just a few more gentle strokes of those clever fingers and you would come. "Please Ignis, I promise to be good." His fingers slow and you feel like you’re going to scream in frustration
"Alpha please" You close your eyes and he growls loudly, leaning down to kiss your neck, but he stops again. Hand moving from between your legs to cradle your jaw, focusing your attention back on to him
“Do you want to cum?” he whispers, dragging a thumb across your jaw
“Yes”
“Yes what?”
“Yes! Yes alpha, yes sir, just please Ignis!” You feel the shudder of approval that goes through him at your desperation, your words slurring together as you try to find the words he’s looking for.
“Good girl” his hand slowly tracing a line down between the valley of your breasts to rest on your hip. With one more whined please from your throat his fingers idly trace along the edge of your panties, moving slowly inward to tease your clit once again with his thumb. Still ignoring your pleas and whimpers he goes at his own slow pace. Moving the lacy material to the side he runs a finger down through your folds, sliding through your slickness, teasing your entrance. “so wet omega” a low approving rumble in his chest, he leans down to give you a searing kiss, nipping hard at your lip and just as you think he is about to finally slip inside you and let you have your hard earned release, he pulls away.
The cry that leaves you is nothing short of complete desperation, almost pain, and you can feel tears rolling down your cheeks. You’re dimly aware you are begging, desperately pleading with him as you try to pull him closer but he moves no nearer, instead he stands and leans down to whisper in your ear "I want to do wicked things to you, omega,” he nuzzles against your neck, “but you need to earn them”.
You’re crying freely now as he withdraws from you completely and heads towards the bathroom. He doesn’t react to your tears, and it starts to dawn on you that this wasn’t Ignis comforting you for Gladio’s behaviour; this was Ignis punishing you for your behaviour. The arousal and frustration is gone in an instant, replaced by a cold rush of dismay. Sensing you watching him, Ignis turns his head to meet your gaze
“A warm bath then you can apologise to Gladio” His voice is calm, almost cold and you fight the desire to throw yourself at him and beg for forgiveness. “Ignis….”
you trail off as he turns away from you. His rejection stings and you suddenly feel very alone.
The realisation that if the boys started to find you too much trouble, your disobedience too much of a hassle, they could walk away just as easily as Ignis had done, hits you hard. You truly would be abandoned in this world. You would never get home. They had saved you more times than you could count, they fed you, gave you a bed to sleep in, patiently helped you through the hormonal changes in your body, looked after you and obviously cared about you, and they didn’t ask for much in return really. Just to listen to them.
The stubborn side of you wanted to deny it, that you could find someone else to help you, but their over-protectiveness and the lengths they’d go to keep your Omega status hidden made you think they were telling the truth when they said not all Alphas would be as willing to help as they were. Not that they let you have much interaction with others to disprove that but was it a risk you were willing to take? You wanted to go home, maybe Ignis’ was right, they did know what was best, it was their world after all.
Ignis’ sharp call of your name startles you out of your thoughts and you look over at him, watching as he sorts a towel and some bodywash out of Gladio’s bag. You feel exhausted. Upset and completely drained you can’t bring yourself to fight anymore so you just nod.
