Not now, not yet (Eshe x F!Reader)
a/n: I used dialogues from the game, so some of the will sound familiar hehe
____________________________
“Say hi to Eshe for me”
You rolled your eyes, amused, as you left Zeki's shop, the grimalking laughing behind the counter. This was the third time in two days you'd been summoned to the magistrate's office, and honestly, you were getting a little worried.
It wasn't unusual for Eshe to want absolutely everything in order; it was part of her personality, and everyone in Kilima knew it, just as they knew how to keep their distance when something important was about to happen, because the woman tended to be incredibly perfectionist—well, more so than usual—and to demand more from everyone.
It happened with Duchess Kenyara's visit, and with Subira's arrival, circumstances in which you had learned not to ask too many questions and just do the tasks Eshe entrusted to you as best you could. You knew how important appearances were to her, and you didn't want to be the reason she was in a bad mood for a week if something went wrong and condemn the rest of the village for it.
However, this time was different, because there really wasn't anything extraordinary happening, at least not that you knew of. So why did it seem like the woman had more and more assignments for you, which, oddly enough, didn't seem all that important despite her claims?
Eshe was never one for socializing or small talk, too busy with her work, running the village. And yet, her office was becoming your second most visited stop after the lagoon.
Strange, very strange.
_______________
She shouldn't be doing this, and she knew it. It was wrong, it was improper, and a woman of her class shouldn't be stooping to these tricks, especially not for something as simple and trivial as...longing.
She hated having to put a name to what was happening to her; it made it more real and dangerous, but Eshe had never been weak, and she wasn't going to lie to herself, not like this. As much as it made her stomach churn, she had to accept that she found herself yearning for the human's presence more and more.
She knew exactly when it had started: after Kenyara's visit, after the humiliation. She had yelled at the human, blaming her for the failure of the evening with the duchess, projecting her own frustration and stress onto her. Once she calmed down, she scolded herself for losing control so much, and as a woman of upright principles, she apologized.
She had assumed the girl would roll her eyes and leave with a "whatever" similar to what her daughter Kenyatta would do every time she tried to have a civil conversation with her. However, the human surprised her when she smiled at her and wholeheartedly accepted her apology and explanation.
Apart from Caleri, who had been a good friend for years, no one had ever accepted her explanations and forgiven her so easily. Most just nodded and inwardly judged her as the strict magistrate of Kilima. But not her...she really saw her, she saw Eshe, not the magistrate. And that made her heart skip a beat.
That was the moment when, for the older woman, she stopped being "the human" and became "Y/N," at least in her mind, because she wasn't going to admit it out loud just yet, and also when these... feelings began to surface.
At first, she ignored them, like most of her emotions; after all, she was adept at maintaining a strong front, the result of years of cleaning up after Kenli and doing the work of two people to keep the village running.
However, as her patience with her husband dwindled further, the treacherous little voice in the back of her mind grew more and more persistent. Eshe was no fool; she knew that everyone in Kilima, including Kenli himself, was aware that their marriage was a mere political move, one that, deep down, she had always believed was masterminded by Kenyara.
They had a daughter, yes, and although she loved Kenyatta in her own way, she couldn't deny that her conception had been purely out of obligation, and once that duty was fulfilled, she never shared a bed, or a room, with Kenli again. Truly, the only thing they had in common was their desire for Kenyatta to have the best life possible; unfortunately, even their approaches to this differed masterfully.
That's why she was certain that her reluctance to actively seek Y/N's company wasn't merely out of respect for her loveless marriage; after all, polygamy was perfectly common and acceptable in Palia. No, this was something more...it was fear.
Fear of history repeating itself, of once again exposing her weaknesses to another soul, of trusting and failing once more, of being betrayed when she felt most secure. Fear of the fact that no one had stirred these feelings in her since Kenyara, and even those hadn't been this...intense, or at least she didn't remember them that way.
That's why she couldn't let her guard down, not now, not yet…and still, she had summoned Y/N to her office once more.
______________________
"Hello!" Y/N walked into Eshe's office at City Hall, no longer even bothering to knock.
"Ahh, someone who doesn't give me a splitting headache" Eshe replied in that tone that never let you know if she was being sincere or sarcastic.
"I have the juniper seeds you asked for, ma'am" you smiled as you placed the three small seeds on her desk.
"Finally! We can plant some classy trees in this village. Pine trees are so gauche, don't you think?" Eshe leaned back in her chair, her eyes fixed on you, not the seeds.
"Ehhh, wood is wood" you shrugged "Although yes, they would give this place a different touch... and it will be nice to see them grow after spending three hours in the forest and another two negotiating with Zeki to obtain them."
"That grimalkin, always taking every opportunity to earn extra pennies" the older woman rolled her eyes.
You just chuckled, knowing full well the animosity yet reluctantly respect these two had for each other.
"...why are you bleeding?" Eshe's face suddenly darkened as she noticed the makeshift bandage on your shoulder.
"Oh...I hunted a couple of sernuks for Zeki while I was in the woods" you explained calmly.
"And you somehow managed to shoot yourself?" The woman raised an eyebrow, crossing her arms.
"No...but one of them managed to stab me with its antler before running away," you murmured.
The room fell silent for a while. Eshe's eyes were fixed on the wound, thinking, while you tried not to flinch under her gaze. She always managed to make you feel small under her gaze and make you blush a little, even if she didn't mean to. You assumed it was because of her intimidating and imposing aura, and not necessarily because of the butterflies her presence stirred in your stomach.
"Hurt for doing the grimalkin a favor" Eshe scoffed.
"I do favors for you too, ma'am" you defended yourself "For everyone in the village! Accidents happen."
"My requests never involve putting you directly in danger, though" Eshe narrowed her eyes.
She had made sure of that. She specifically spent hours planning her next request so it would be something easy to obtain, low risk, but also fancy enough to justify her asking for your help.
"...touché" you murmured.
"You need professional healing" the woman sighed and shook her head, standing up. "You'd better find Chayne"
"Yes, ma'am" you nodded, turning to leave.
"...Y/N, wait" she called after you, stopping you.
For a moment, she just stared at you, internally debating with herself and cursing your innate ability to make her question her own nature. It was wrong, she should have been strong... but your cursed eyes made her concede herself a small indulgence, a little mercy.
"You have a Water-type personality, don't you?" she asked in a soft tone extremely rare for her.
"I- yes" you murmured, confused by the change.
"Yours is the most virtuous of the four personalities." Eshe nodded. "You are guided by principle and empathy, and you wear your heart on your sleeve, just...a few words of warning, Y/N"
Suddenly, her hand was on your chin, holding you firmly but gently. You blushed a little, and that only seemed to amuse her because she smiled slightly as she tilted your face up, using the height difference to force you to look at her directly.
"Not everybody has your best interests in mind, even those you consider 'friends,' child" he said. "...you are a lovely being, too beautiful to lose yourself in bad decisions."
You swallowed nervously, feeling a shiver run down your spine as her thumb gently brushed your lower lip. Eshe allowed her eyes to linger on your mouth for a moment before pulling away.
"Do not trust blindly. I say this as someone who was in your shoes once..." she said, returning to her desk as if nothing had happened.
You left without another word. Your face was red, your legs weak, and your brain too foggy. All you could think about was the feel of her fingers on your skin, and the scent of her perfume that lingered on your senses.