#ew!thinking

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real pic of me checking twice a day in the ftm!reader tag:

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"hot girl do that" "clean girl" "messy girl" "girl dinner" "my girls"

Can we stop that ?

Yes I'm a boy I do skincare, yes I read fanfictions, yes I love Pinterest, yes I have celebrity crushes, yes I love reading books, yes I love plushies, yes I love soft colors as much as darker

That doesn't mean I am a fucking girl.

A boy can have periods. A boy can take care of himself. A boy can fit in every stupid girly clichés and still be a boy.

You can't understand how fucking dysphoric it is to relate with contents that are only made for girls.

It do not take efforts to be neutral when you talk, even less when you write (not specifically fanfiction, but a post here on Tumblr, or wherever)

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It's not funny anymore, I just want to read, please. Why so much fem!reader ? Not but seriously, I'm forced to read 'em because there is no great ftm!reader that I don't already read. Plus there's so much smut content but no real fanfictions, with chapters, a good plot, etc. I just want to read, and because I'm born transgender I can't 🤓🎀

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One of the many things that tear my heart apart about Dex, is the moment in DD season three where he knows he's going back to his worst habits, he knows it, you clearly see it through his eyes.

After the Bulletin attack, he tried to take his life back, he realises what he just did. He reached for Julie, he explains why she is important for him (one thing that personally surprised me in a very good way, I love this dialogue), and he honestly did a pretty good job I mean without Julie's murder I think he could have restore a bit of control.

And yes I get the "he was already a psycho before Fisk" I get it, but still we see that he tried, really tried, to keep it together, but he's too instable and easily manipulated.

Another theory I read yesterday about him, is that in DDBA he tried to understand Matt's grief, really. And I agree with this take. Dex wants to feel empathy for Matt's situation, he understand why Foggy's murder is impactful for Daredevil but he's just unable physically to express empathy for him, his mind doesn't work this way. But I love that especially in the last episode, we see in his eyes that he's trying to process Matt's grief.

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and bonus of some things I made + creepy Simon because I love my island

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I did my job 🫡

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I saw someone saying that a lot of Hozier's songs could be associated with Bloodymary (or simply PHM or Iron Lung) and now I can't unsee it:

Sedated, we're nursing on a poison that never stung Our teeth and lungs are lined with the scum of it Somewhere for this, death and guns We are deaf, we are numb Free and young and we can feel none of it Darlin', don't you, stand there watching, won't you Come and save me from it? Darlin', don't you, join in, you're supposed to Drag me away from it —Sedated

Honey, you're familiar Like my mirror years ago Idealism sits in prison Chivalry fell on his sword Innocence died screaming Honey, ask me, I should know I slithered here from Eden Just to sit outside your door Babe There's something wretched about this Something so precious about this Where to begin Babe There's something broken about this But I might be hoping about this Oh, what a sin —From Eden

After all, darlin', I wouldn't sell the world The way that things are turnin' If it falls, I would hold on for all it's worth The future's so bright it's burnin' [...] Martyrs of our revolution Their spinning caused the earth to shake The problem brought its own solution They power now the world we've made —Empire Now

Heaven and Hell were words to me —Work Song

If I tell you this is drowning, you'd tell me I'm walking on water I could bring fire from the mountain, you'd tell me it feels a little colder I don't wanna —Nobody's Soldier

In summer's heat, I learned to dread, the comin' of the night The awful things we do to make the head go quiet You'd press your body to the concrete when you were small The rains of winter seemed to never leave the walls "Uiscefhuaraithe" The feel of coolness only water brings There are some things that no one teaches you, love That God in his awful wisdom first programs in But darlin', all my dreamin' is only been put to shame And darlin', all my dreamin' has only been given a name But it happened easy, darlin' As natural as another leg around you in the bed [...] I wish I could say That the river of my arms have found the ocean I wish I could say the cold lake water of my heart Well, Christ, it's boilin' over —To Someone From A Warm Climate (Uiscefhuaraithe)

And that day that we watch the death of the sun —Wasteland Baby!

Darling, there's a part of me I'm afraid will always be Trapped within an abstract from a moment of my life The weeds up through the concrete, the traffic picking up speed All my love and terror balanced there between those eyes —Abstract (Psychopomp)

To be twisted by something A shame without a sin [...] Rare is this love, keep it covered I need you to run to me, run to me, lover Run until you feel your lungs bleeding —Run

Do you think I'd give up? That this might've shook the love from me Or that I was on the brink? How could you think, darlin', I'd scare so easily? Now that it's done There's not one thing that I would change My life was a storm since I was born How could I fear any hurricane? —Francesca

Darling, we sacrificed We gave our time to somethin' undefined This phantom life sharpens like an image But it sharpens like a knife —Who We Are

You know the distance never made a difference to me I swam a lake of fire, I'd have walked across the floor of any sea Ignored the vastness between all that can be seen And all that we believe So I thought you were like an angel to me Funny how true colours shine in darkness and in secrecy If there were scarlet flags, they washed out in the mind of me Where a blinding light shone on you every night And either side of my sleep Where you were held frozen like an angel to me [...] It ain't the being alone (sha-la-la) It ain't the empty home, baby (sha-la-la, sha-la-la, la-la-la) You know I'm good on my own (sha-la-la), sha-la-la, baby You know, it's more the being unknown And there are some people, love, who are better unknown —Unknown / Nth

Be that hopeful feeling when Eden was lost (Lover, be good to me) It's been deaf to our laughter since the master was crossed (Lover, be good to me) Which side of the wall really suffers that cost? —Be

These days, I think I owe my life to flowers that were left here By my mother, ain't that like them, gifting life to you again? This life lived mostly underground, unknowing either sight nor sound 'Til reaching up for sunlight just to be ripped out by the stem And sensing only now it's dying, drying out, then drowning blindly Blooming forth, its every colour in the moments it has left To share the space with simple living things, infinitely suffering But fighting off, like all creation, the absence of itself, but anyway —First Time

Words hung above but never would form Like a cry at the final breath that is drawn Remember me, love, when I'm reborn As the shrike to your sharp and glorious thorn I'd no idea on what ground I was founded All of that goodness is going with you now Then when I met you, my virtues uncounted All of my goodness is going with you now Dragging along, following your form Hung like the pelt of some prey you had worn —Shrike

With each love I cut loose, I was never the same Watching still living roots be consumed by the flame I was fixed on your hand of gold Laying waste to my lovin' long ago —Would That I

Take me to church I'll worship like a dog at the shrine of your lies I'll tell you my sins, so you can sharpen your knife Offer me my deathless death Oh, good God, let me give you my life No masters or kings when the ritual begins There is no sweeter innocence than our gentle sin In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene Only then, I am human Only then, I am clean —Take Me To Church

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HEAR ME OUT

I love the concept of asexual Dex, but I might add a little twist in it, from personal opinion ofc.

I think that Dex has sexual encounters but as his other relationships and basic social interactions, it is not healthy. For him sex is overwhelming—too intense, too much. His need for order and clean environment is freaking out during sex, there is so much fluids, textures, smells, sensations...

But I do think that he still has some. For me, he can have two type of sexual activities: one very primal, and one impulsive. But either are chaotic.

The "primal" one is basically where I put his possible past sexual experiences. I think that he only had hookups, with different person every time, to avoid awkwardness and real social interactions as much as possible. So maybe he'll flirt with a cute waiter and then fuck with them, because it feels hot and sexy in the moment, but that's it, absolutely no romantism in this.

Then the second is impulsive. This one has a tone of emotion in it, but as always it is not healthy. For example, if you do believe in Dexmatt, I think that in this dynamic Dex could actually feel a sexual attraction to Matthew. Not because he's in love with him, but because he is obsessed with him. (Not in yandere kinky way, I'm talking about psychology here). Matthew and Dex have a special connexion through death and violence. Why I called this "category" impulsive is because I think Dex would be very passive through this process. His emotions are taking the lead, against his will.

While the "primal" can be associated with Fbi!Dex, I think the "impulsive" is 100% DDBA!Dex.

Another headcanon I'd love about Dex in sexuality, is that I think he'd be very very awkward after sex. He would need space, a deep shower, a protocol to follow. He would be sweaty, maybe even having a panic attack in some cases. Because again, it is not healthy. For the person he does it with, but also for him. Even if he might enjoyed it, it's in a certain way not very consented for him, it's a form of traumatic respond.

But !!! I do also think that he could have healthy sexual activities, but under very specific conditions he'll need to understand firstly himself—thing he struggles to do.

I think it's for all of these reasons that submissive!Dex makes A LOT of sense. He needs control over his own mind, he needs someone to guide him through it. And in contrast, dom!Dex is also a reality but during unhealthy sex (one shot, quicky, dub-con etc.) I'm not saying these kinks are unhealthy!! Just in Dex's world and life, they unfortunately are, unless it's with someone that really concider him and help him understand that sex is not supposed to be forced, or uncomfortable.

Again, it's my opinion 🫡