I am angry and sad and sick inside. I hate feeling like an idiot for trusting someone. When you love a person and they're in your life for a long time, you get to a point where you think they would never hurt you on purpose, that they would never put you in a situation where you were bound to get hurt just so that they can get what they want. You feel safe with them And the realization--after so many years and so many sacrifices and after forgiving so SO many transgressions because you thought they were unintentional--that this person you thought had your back would just as soon throw you under the bus for their own selfish reasons is just a horrible fucking feeling. I am so done. All the effort I put into my relationship with that person, not to mention the shit I have gone through since we broke up, was completely wasted. I was good to him and he crushed me. A two year relationship and a twelve year friendship, gone. Burned up. Stomped on. Spat on. The bright side is, I've always deserved better than this, and now nothing could ever make me go back to that person. It hurts, but at least I know the truth now. So, to the love of my life, to whom I literally gave everything I had and who time and again repaid me with shitting all over everything in my life that's good, I say: Thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off and die.