#excellent joke

[team-118]

"I guess they don't make these things like they used to" CHIM????? GJFJSKDJFJKAJDHF

[ohnothisisathing]

Jaiden saying that Forever built a place to pretend Richas is there and that it doesn’t sound bad, maybe in a different biome. lol Jaiden.

[mxwhore]

have a soak, dear friend

[buffy--the--vampire--slayer]

Are any Halloween monsters good at math? No—unless you Count Dracula!

Didn’t realize I had asks for an embarrassingly long time (and I don’t remember the context on this), but yes, I would Count Dracula!

[zanysmurf]

[kindofsharethat]

i had a VERY heavy dinner last night so i thought it would be best to go for a walk. so i did. there's a lake 13 blocks from my flat so me and girlfriend ended up walking there and sitting on the bank. there were a lot of pebbles around us and a small one was shaped like a guitar pick. she pointed at it and said with a straight face "that one's for rock music". worst thing i've ever heard. but it cracked me up. how much would u bet harry would tell louis something like that?

if you haven’t yet, marry her

[evelynstarshine]

WHY CANT YOU PUT ANYTHING ELSE IN A BAG THAT CONTAINS 1 FISH AND 1 KNIFE BECAUSE YOUVE GOT EVERYTHING YOU NEED TO FILLET

[knights-of-the-glittery-table]

It’s 9:20am and I’m starting the day off in a correct fashion when I see I’ve been sent this