You want me to stop your mind from racing
But I didn’t give you your anxieties,
So I don’t know what you are even talking about
You see me floating on a calm wave
And you want to splash yourself right next to me
In an ocean full of space
And even if I was floating alone with headphones on in the vastness of space,
You’d figure out a way to crash into me
Only to push me away harshly
To then try and gingerly reel me back
Because you know there is zero gravity
So I came back down to earth
Where I plan on continuing to live in peace
Away from the chatter
Away from the senseless noise
Away from the tasteless drip that gossip deploys
Maybe if you’d learn to control your mind better....
Pairing: Reader x Bucky
Word Count: 1.5K
Warnings: Reader is bisexual, angst, fluff, swearing
A/N: Reader is hispanic.
I hope I did okay with this request.
“Don’t you think it’s too soon?” Nat cocks an eyebrow at you,
You casually shrug, “It could be... But we spent so long dancing around our emotions, it feels like we’ve been together for a year, not a month,”
Natasha’s eyes soften and she gives you a sweet smile, “God, you’re such a romantic,”
You give her a playful smirk, then blow her a kiss. A giggle escapes Natasha’s lips, as she shakes her head at you.
“Hey doll,” you spin around in your office chair to see Bucky leaning against the door frame. You swear that for a second you see a frown etched between his eyebrows and a confused look in his eyes, but it’s quickly replaced with a sweet smile.
You stiffen, caught off guard. You can feel Natasha’s stare burning into your temple, but you keep your eyes trained on your boyfriend, “H-Hey babe,” you stammer, already feeling yourself sweating nervously, “What’re you doing here?”
Bucky cocks an eyebrow at you, confusion flashing on his face again for a split second, “Well, we all live in the Tower...”
“I mean, why are you in my office?” you rush out. Your mind desperately searching for a forgotten lunch date,
“I was surprising you by taking you to lunch?” Bucky could no longer hide his confusion, he was like an open book. Your heart prangs as you notice the hurt in his eyes. You shouldn’t be keeping your surprise from him, but it would be worth it,
“I’ve got... to go,” Nat mumbles, quickly glancing up at Bucky and back at you. You hum an okay as she hops off your desk and quickly leaves your office,
“Babe, I can’t do lunch,” you give him an apologetic look, “I’ve already got plans,”
Bucky’s brow furrows, “Who with?”
You can’t stop yourself from looking shocked and scared for a moment. You were a terrible liar, you had to get out of there before you blurt out your surprise. Jumping up, you grab your coat and bag, trying desperately to think of a good cover.
“Secretary Ross,” you blurt out, “He wants updates on you and Steve,”
Bucky can’t seem to wipe the frown off his face, but he gives you a few sharp nods. As you rush out of the room, you lean up and plant a soft kiss on his cheek. You start feeling a little guilty as you practically run towards the elevator, feeling Bucky’s eyes watching your every step.
~~ Bucky’s POV ~~
Bucky could no longer hide his confusion and hurt as he watched you hurry to the elevator. You were hiding something, he just didn’t know what. Standing in your office doorway, he fought an internal war in his mind. He wanted to trust you, to not worry or be jealous of a potential something... or someone. But a nagging voice in his head wouldn’t let him let go of his jealous side. Bucky’s feet were moving before he’d consciously made the decision.
Even with the serum pulsing through his veins, the 85 flight run down the service stairs of the Tower left Bucky wheezing. He scolds himself for being so jealous and a complete idiot.
Peaking his head out of the stairwell door, he spots you leaving the Tower lobby. You look around the street, as if you were searching for a certain person. Bucky’s heart sinks as he sees you get into a car with a tall, blonde woman.
Bucky feels as though his heart had been ripped from his chest. He’d been chasing you for so long, he knew that the last month was too good to be true. Bucky loved you more than anything else in this world, but now he felt like he was falling from that train carriage all over again. He tries to calm himself down, chanting to himself ‘it’s not what it looks like. It’s not what it looks like. Don’t jump to conclusions’
He calmed down enough to make himself slowly walk to the elevator. He felt winded, but he was going to wait til you got back to do anything he could come to regret.
~~ Reader’s POV ~~
You were bouncing with excitement as you exit the elevator. The first person you see is Nat, sitting on the couch, reading.
“How’d it go?” she asks in a hushed voice, looking as excited as you felt,
“I got it!” you exclaim in a low voice, afraid Bucky was nearby and would overhear, “I’m going to find Buck, I can’t wait to tell him!”
She gives you a nod and resumes reader her book as you practically skip down the hall in search of your boyfriend. Your first guess is the gym, but he isn’t there, so you hurry to your bedroom.
“Hey honey!” you exclaim, dropping your bag by your door and jumping on him.
Your excitement drains from you as you notice Bucky doesn’t wrap his arms around you; he’s only standing in place, stiff.
You pull back, frowning up at him, “What’s wro-”
“If I gave you an out, right now, at the one month mark would you take it?” Bucky looks at you, the only expression you can make out is the hurt written all over his face,
“What?” you pull back, feeling your stomach churn,
“I’m giving you an exit ramp. If you don’t want to do this,” Bucky motions to the both of you, “Anymore, then I’m giving you a free out,”
Your eyes start prickling, telling you that tears were close behind. A lump rises in your throat, you can hardly swallow past it, but you force yourself to speak.
“Where is this coming from?” your voice was low, but the hurt was evident,
“Do you want this exit ramp or not?” Bucky sighs, crossing his arms over his chest,
“Of course not!” you exclaim, tears were threatening to spill as you searched your boyfriends face, hoping that he’d break into a smile and tell you he was joking,
“I saw you!” Bucky’s voice raising, making you flinch back, “Getting into a car with that blonde,”
Your jaw drops open. You always knew Bucky was jealous, and apart of you was angry he’d followed you, but you remind yourself how suspicious you were acting before you ran out earlier. But for him to think you’d cheat? You feel anger bubble up inside.
You spin on your heel, realising that he wasn’t going to fully believe you until you proved it. Pulling the documents out of your bag, you turn back around and shove the sheets of paper against his chest.
“The blonde? She’s a real estate agent,” you scoff, folding your arms over your chest. Bucky’s eyes grow wide and he finally looks down at the documents now in his hands,
“Y-You got us a... place?” Bucky stammers, looking guilty,
“I was surprising you. We always talk about how cramped we find the Tower now that we’re together. I know it’s early, but I’ve loved you for the longest time,” you stop mid sentence, realising you’d said the L word for the first time out loud,
“You... love me?” Bucky asks, a small smile dancing on his lips,
“Yes,” you sigh, “I would never cheat on you. Ever. With anyone,”
“You always flirt with Nat,” Bucky mumbles, dropping his head, clearing embarrassed,
“That’s not flirting,” you scoff, “She’s my best friend. Yes, she’s a smoking hot Russian, but she’s not the one I couldn’t keep my eyes off from the moment we met. I’m not with you just because you’re attractive, Buck. We have a connection, I fell in love with you, as a person... Your face and body are just an added bonus,” Bucky glances at you, the smile back on his face. But you weren’t finished, “But if you can’t accept me for who I am, and you don’t trust me, then maybe that exit ramp-”
“I’m so sorry for not trusting you. It’s just... you’re you and well, me,” Bucky interrupts.
Your eyes grow wide, “Oh please!” you scoff, a little smile finally breaking out on your face.
“I’m jealous, and possessive and insecure,” Bucky steps closer, pulling you into his arms, “It’s something that I have to work on. But I love you, Y/N,”
Butterflies explode in your stomach as you hear the three words you’d been dreaming of hearing from him since day one. Leaning up, you softly kiss Bucky.
“Can we still live together?” Bucky asks, his voice low,
“Oh, I don’t know,” you smirk at him, your tone is teasing so that he catches your sarcasm, “That exit ramp is still-”
“Fuck the exit ramp,” Bucky chuckles as he pulls you into a deeper kiss.
In honor of Charles being returned to his rightful throne in Bethesda, here's this classic road story.
November 2010
So Charles was driving us home for Thanksgiving break. He had just about most of us: me, Mark, Joss, and Carlo. We were headed to my house first where we'd post up for dinner and then all go our separate ways.
Charles had some directions that he'd gotten off the internet because I didn't know the way because I had never driven it myself. So at every turn, he'd ask, "Brad, does this look right?" And I'd just pop up from the very back seat of the minivan and just say, "Uhh....yeah." It was a very questionable drive, especially since it began with us driving the wrong way down the wrong road.
We're on 97, which I obviously knew by sight, so I told Charles we were almost home. Then, as we were on the ramp from 97 to 695, Charles asks the fateful question.
"Where are we now, Brad?"
I look out the window. "Well...This is an exit ramp."
