A friendly reminder to all Metroid handlers that Metroids are not pets, and should not be fed anything other than standard Metroid rations.

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A friendly reminder to all Metroid handlers that Metroids are not pets, and should not be fed anything other than standard Metroid rations.
Yes, I really did just implement the whole Arms Micron... thing... into my posts here. What can I say, I like minicons.
If you care at all, I'd like to explain a bit of how I imagine Soundwave's relationship with Laserbeak and, I guess, Zori. I don't see either drone as having its own spark, but rather having a small part of Soundwave's own processor. They are independent, meaning they possess consciousness and make their own decisions, but while separate from Soundwave they are, in essence, copies of him. It basically means he CAN be in two places at once and doesn't have to consciously act for both, because they have their own processors.
But it is limited, which is why the only dialog to and from Laserbeak and Zori is task-based. That's why Soundwave still directly tells each drone what task to perform; although the drone can figure out how to go about doing that task by itself.
Like was seen in TFP Minus One, when Laserbeak reconnects to Soundwave, the information transferred about what happened to each in the interim is almost immediate. Subjectively speaking, I'd imagine it feels like suddenly being able to remember a whole event you had forgotten.
And what's more, while Soundwave remains connected to Laserbeak and Zori, he basically has a multicore processor which is how he can do all of the crazy multitasking he does in the show.
Would definitely make him ADHD though. If you're wondering how multitasking and ADHD go together, I look at it this way; if 80% of my mental energy is focused on something, that extra 20% is focused on everything else around me, and the mere sound of a door opening will cause me to look up and become distracted. Putting that extra energy into something like listening to news can then allow you to cut out the possibility of distraction.
Even though it should really be the other way around, I might as well commit to text posts being for the story posts and chat posts being from me. I'll probably end up breaking that tradition in the future though because I'll have forgotten about this agreement to it.
By the way please feel free to comment if possible, and more specifically to comment with why the hell you like all of my posts so much. Even *I* don't like all of my posts that much.
Long-Distance Communication
A look into some of the details that are often taken for granted among the Space Pirate communication/transportation system.
So I've been very preoccupied, although I think I normally forget my yearly speech until later in the day anyway. It's January 10th again, and today we celebrate the success of five years of Facetroid as we move into the sixth. Or at least I'm celebrating, I don't know about the rest of you. We've slowly lost posters over the years, but this year we gained "Handman" (Gordy) and hopefully Jason will be coming back from his mission sometime this spring. Neko, Arl, and Joshua have stayed vigilant with me through posting droughts, and I appreciate the loyalty to one of the things central to my life. Next year I hope we can create a story that has plant spiders.
I also figure I should make a brief explanation about what I said earlier regarding Metroid siphoning.
X parasites had an unknown origin, but the Chozo discovered them at some point and, realizing their devastating potential, created the Metroids in response. They probably realized that the X could adapt to any weakness they had, but what they didn't expect was the Metroids to do the same. So, in their brilliant wisdom, they created Mother Brain to control them. Now you have an organic supercomputer telepathically controlling artificially created life forms, with the intention of wiping out the X. The X had no way to adapt to the Metroids's ability to siphon raw life energy (the fact that the Chozo could come up with such a thing shows how far advanced they were), and the X parasites eventually dwindled. The Metroids started to adapt as well, since they had to find new sources of food.
Mother Brain eventually allied with the Space Pirates and, combined with the legions of hungry Metroids, was able to drive away the Chozo. Metroids were distributed by Pirates to Tallon IV, Aether, Urtraghus, Elysia, as well as other locations. They adapted as well, through Phazon, through generations in new environments, and through Pirate testing. Hunter Metroids gained the ability to siphon life from a distance, although I would imagine it takes much more energy than a standard Metroid's physical attachment. With Phazon enhancements, this ability was probably enhanced. Since Phazon creatures like Dark Samus can absorb Phazon at a distance, and absorb multiple sources at the same time as was shown in the beginning of Corruption, Metroid siphoning combined with Phazon could use less energy and affect multiple targets.
Obviously, life energy is an actual type of energy, probably closely related to that of Phazon. Conductive materials are often conductive to multiple forms of energy, so it's not a huge step to say that life energy could be drawn through metals. Of course, this adds to the energy cost.
Urtraghus, having many metal walls, would be an ideal place to attempt this. However, the two main drawbacks would be that it is limited to a certain radius, and unless there is a large gathering of Pirates, would probably not be worth the energy expenditure. If this were not the case, Metroids would have wiped out all life on Urtraghus centuries ago.
The idea of absorbing life energy, though, means that Metroids are the pinnacle of evolution. They could wipe out all parasitic life similar to the X, including Phazon.
I said this was going to be brief. I said that before I started writing.
"Space Pirate" status
So, obviously the genetic heritage of an average Pirate is varied, and there are disagreements about multiple aspects of them and their society. This is just a compilation of how I see them and their infrastructure, so feel free to comment if there's something you disagree with, or would like to add. I'd like to compose a list of significant people by species, planets, and ships on the wiki as well, but I'd need to research markup formatting again.
Obviously, not all Pirates are part of the military. And there's probably more than one military, at least in a general sense. I envision very little overlap between Mother Brain's faction and the activities of the admirals. They share the same resources and follow the same paperwork, guidelines, and regulations, but they haven't tended to interact.
Urtraghus is not their evolutionary homeworld. I can accept this. It's agreed that their true homeworld was exploited of all possible resources, had its climate altered until it was uninhabitable, destroyed, or most likely a combination of the three.
Urtraghus is a highly altered planet from what it used to be. The Abyss is one of the few geological formations that still exists, as most of the rest of the planet is developed. Obviously, the Pirates seem to pay no attention to the planet's natural environment, given that it's all but dead, and plagued with acid rain.
Because the species is so populous, widely spread, and genetically modified, there have to be a number of subspecies, for lack of a better word. And, because of the latter, it's very possible that some of these variations may be unable to interbreed. I really don't like calling them Pirates, because that name is purely artificial.
There is obviously a large population of Zebesian descendants, given that the conquer of the indigenous Zebesians was probably the greatest achievement by the species. At least some traces of Zebesian genetics, either by direct modification or interbreeding, are present in probably the majority of Pirates. Those with laser claws, who are probably more respected than others, are obviously more Zebesian than Pirate.
Because of the time since they've existed, all Pirates are probably part Chozo as well, although the true amount of Chozo DNA they have is very small, not enough to make very much of a difference.
I imagine that Urtraghus has been a heavily populated planet for many centuries, so the genetics of the long-term citizens are probably less commonly altered than those in the military. For this reason, the average Urtraghian Pirate is probably more genetically "pure" than most in the military.
At the same time, there's probably genetic traces of every other sentient species alive in Pirate genetics, with one exception: humans.
There have to be citizens who are not part of the Pirate military, and are not part of the Federation. Again, I'd love a different name to refer to their species. I've made up a few Pirate-owned companies including Markov Transport Company, Omnipotech, and the Cortega station. Still, the philosophy that many Pirates follow makes it honorable to give your life to the cause, and so this is most likely why many of them enlist into the military.
I also imagine that Urtraghus is one of the few places in the galaxy with a majority of Pirate citizens. For the most part, it's untouched by the military and other societies. There are definitely a lot of factory and mining jobs, but there's also a great deal of poverty.
Metroid races
(Facts presented here are a compilation of facts from in-game logs, Facetroid history, and history presented in the Metroid manga. Zivelian Alliance is a created name for the alliance mentioned in Corruption (Bryyo logs) composed of the Chozo, the Bryyonians, the Luminoth and the Ylla. By 'homeworld', I mean either the planet on which the species originated, or where they are most populous, although typically these tend to be the same thing. This is purely referential, and is subject to change.)
Humans: Homeworld Earth. Federation citizens. Populous
Vhozon: Homeworld Vho. Federation citizens. Populous
Phrygisians: Homeworld Phrygis (moon of Bes III). Federation. Populous
Jovians: Homeworld Jovia. Demographics split between Federation and independent Jovian citizenship. Uncommon.
Kriken: Homeworld (unknown name). Most commonly part of the Kriken Empire, though some are Federation citizens. Populous, but only in the empire.
Luminoth: Homeworld Aether. Most commonly members of the independent Luminoth aggregate, formerly part of the Zivelian Alliance. Uncommon.
Vanerians (Keaton's race): Homeworld unknown. Population has declined significantly over the past few centuries. Currenly, the population is not sustainable. Uncommon.
Space Pirates (Urtraghian descent): Current homeworld Urtraghus. Most commonly part of the Pirate military. Urtraghian Pirates make up 70% of the Federation's Pirate population. Minority, but populous.
Space Pirates (Zebesian descent): Homeworld Zebes. Most commonly part of the Pirate military (Zebesian faction, under Mother Brain). Populous.
Zebesians: Homeworld Zebes. True Zebesians no longer exist; they were killed, enslaved, and slowly assimilated with the Space Pirate population by way of genetic alterations. Extinct.
Reptilicus: Homeworld Bryyo. Reptilicus are primal hunters who are allegedly the descended form of the once-great Bryyonians. Through several generations, they have adapted to the burnt wasteland Bryyo has become.
Diamonts: Homeworld Mondreus (destroyed). Existed under an independent Diamont federation. Assumed extinct, although their status is shrouded in mystery.
Bryyonians: Homeworld Bryyo (largely unihabitable). Existed in the Zivelian Alliance. Extinct.
N'kren: Homeworld unknown. Only records referring to them are in several Luminoth logs, possibly about the Zivelian Alliance.
Ylla: Homeworld unknown. Only records referring to them are in several Bryyonian logs about the Zivelian Alliance. Status unknown.
Alimbians: Homeworld unknown. Existed in the Alimbic cluster; it's possible they too were part of the Zivelian Alliance. Missing.
Chozo: True homeworld unknown. The Chozo existed as part of the Zivelian Alliance, and records show that they were most likely the first sentient race to have existed in the galaxy. Many of them were killed by original Space Pirates under the control of Mother Brain, and further massacred by Phazon beings and Metroids. Disappearance still remains mysterious. Logs aren't often accessible due to the advanced technology required to access it. Assumed extinct.
Breakthroughs in Phazon Chemistry
Log number: X3776-NKVL Log type: Scientific Observation Author: Admiral Halley (Admiral status conflicted) Security Level: All
[The following message was sent as a broadcast to all Science Team members, as well as a collection of [GALACTIC_FEDERATION] addresses, clearance unknown.]