WOOOhOOOo THANK YOU FOR ASKING. LET’S DO THIS. (Don’t worry. I’m putting this under a read more.)1) Sexuality?I’m heterosexual.2) If you could meet anyone on this earth, who would it be?Anyone? aNYONE? Fuck. I don’t know. The person that I’m gonna marry one day. It’d be nice knowing who that is.3) Grab the book nearest to you, turn to page 23, give me line 17.So the book is “The Dharma Bums” by Jack Kerouac. There is no line 17 if I go by sentence, so I’m literally going to count down 17 lines and go from the beginning of whatever sentence starts on that line.“We talked a while longer about Han Shan and poems on cliffs and as I was going away his friend Rol Sturlason, a tall blond goodlooking kid, came in to discuss his coming trip to Japan with him.“ 4) What do you think about most?My future. Where will I be in five years? What will I do? What will I look like? Who will still be with me?5) What does your latest text message from someone else say?"I do not know” 9:06PM6) Do you sleep with or without clothes on?With clothes on. Unfortunately, that includes pants. Damn you, other people. (If I lived alone, like I did last semester, my bed would be a no pants zone.)
7) What’s your strangest talent?
I don’t know if I have any strange talents. I harmonize without thinking about it. Is that a strange talent?8) Girls…. (finish the sentence); Boys…. (finish the sentence)Girls are people. Boys are people.9) Ever had a poem or song written about you?Not yet. Just saying no makes me feel it’ll never happen. MY SONG IS OUT THERE SOMEWHERE
10) When is the last time you played the air guitar?Like ten minutes ago, honestly. I’m so sorry.
11) Do you have any strange phobias?
yOU BET I DO. The strangest probably is the fear of trying new foods. I mean, it’s kinda not food neophobia and more of an eating disorder, but yeah. Trying new foods is scary and gives me anxiety. The last food I tried was about two months ago. It was a hamburger. It took me several years of mental preparation (I wish I was kidding).12) Ever stuck a foreign object up your nose?Probably. Those years between 1-5 are really a blur. 13) What’s your religion?Roman Catholic.14) If you are outside, what are you most likely doing?Complaining and getting a sunburn.15) Do you prefer to be behind the camera or in front of it?Ehhh, probably in front. I just take really bad pictures because my arms are short and my closests friends (my boobs) get in the way. 16) Simple but extremely complex. Favorite band?Probably Vampire Weekend right now. I’ve really been enjoying them. I’m not going to name an all time favorite band because that would be ridiculous.17) What was the last lie you told?Uhhh…? I think it was me telling my mom that I’d just woken up from a very impromptu but necessary nap when I’d been awake for like 15 minutes and just didn’t want to move. (It was like 9:30, so)18) Do you believe in karma?I’m not sure. I do feel like some things feel like they are happening as retribution for past behavior, but also sometimes bad things just happen. I don’t know. The universe is a weird, constantly expanding organized chaos and we’re just a part of it. 19) What does your URL mean?It’s part of a line from “The Fault in Our Stars” by John Green.“Whenever you read a cancer booklet or website or whatever, they always list depression among the side effects of cancer. But, in fact, depression is not a side effect of cancer. Depression is a side effect of dying.”While I do not and hope to never have cancer, that line about depression really meant a lot to me the first time I read it. Having struggled with depression several times in my life (and I still occasionally do), that line really impacted me. When I am having a depressive episode, I just don’t even feel like I am alive anymore. There is no joy or sadness, just a constant numbness resting inside my chest. Things just happen. Life moves forward and I feel none of it. Moments of happiness are fleeting and small, like laughing at a joke. They do not last and do not feel the same. Nothing feels the same. That line kind of made me think about how my depression was related to a different kind of dying. While maybe it was not so extreme as the ultimate finality of physical life, perhaps my dying was an emotional one. That was my small introduction to death. I was willing to take the invitation several times, but I’m glad I didn’t.
20) What is your greatest weakness; your greatest strength?Weakness: I get very afraid of the unknown and it holds me back, preventing me from doing things I would probably enjoy and love.Strength: I am lucky enough to have wonderful friends that love me and help me do things I would never have done alone.
21) Who is your celebrity crush?David Cook. There are at least seven others, but he is the unwavering constant in terms of my celebrity crushes. It’s not my fault dudes are hot and he is a hot dude.
22) Have you ever gone skinny dipping?Nope.23) How do you vent your anger?I don’t really get *angry*. I try not to, anyway. If someone does infuriate me, though, then I will let my stubbornness reign and I will not speak to them. Not even a little bit. (Like one of my ex-best friends from elementary school. I found out she was making fun of me and I haven’t spoken to her in over a decade. Do not test me. If you cross the line, then there is no respect for you in my mind and I will see no problems letting you go.)If something gets me angry, something I can’t control, then I get really frustrated. I feel like throwing shit and punching stuff. Sometimes I feel like I want to rip my hair out because I feel like I’m going to explode. I never do any of these things, however, and just try to breathe and think things through more logically.
24) Do you have a collection of anything?You could say stuffed animals, because I have a lot of those. I also have a lot of books. I don’t consciously collect anything, though.25) Do you prefer talking on the phone or video chatting online?Video chatting online. I like seeing people’s faces when I talk to them. It feels closer to the person actually being there, too.26) Are you happy with the person you’ve become?Not entirely, but I’m working on it every day.27) What’s a sound you hate; sound you love?Hate: People eating bagels with cream cheese. Love: Laughter
28) What’s your biggest “what if”?What if I were thin?29) Do you believe in ghosts? How about aliens?Honestly, no. But after my dog died I felt very unsettled until one day I just sat next to where she used to lay and said goodbye myself in my own way. While her doggie spirit was not there, I think there are sort of…mental ghosts? The things that you hold on to in your mind that you have to let go of, the “spirit” that you keep going back to, and that is very real. Aliens, as in life from places in outer space? They probably exist. Outright saying that they do not exist would insinuate that, out of the entire expanse of the cosmos, we are the only planet with living things. That would be both narrow minded and kind of improbable. Aliens, as in those things from movies that abduct people? That is ridiculous.
30) Stick your right arm out; what do you touch first? Do the same with your left arm.Right: Laptop screen.Left: Headphones.