“sorry to call you in at such an ambiguous time. this was the only available studio time.” looking at the clock, she sees that it’s a little past 5pm. suji thinks that she would have run home to finish working on the song, but the inspiration had hit her right there and then as she was finishing up choreography practice. her producer friends continue to tell her that she should probably upgrade the home studio she has, but it’s not like she knows how to use all that equipment on her own. working within the walls of the company felt safer for some reason. this way, actual producers were only a simple phone call away.
looking up at jihoon, she makes a gesture towards the many empty seats in the studio. “take a seat anywhere, really.” she had been in the middle of working on music for her upcoming album that was only recently given the okay by gold star. while there was no precise date out just yet, she knew that they would give her a slot sometime towards the end of the year. “i have a bunch of drafts, but i don’t think any of them are gonna work for this next album. i guess i just needed a second pair of ears?” she’s not sure why it comes out sounding like a question, but she’s always appreciated having a second opinion. or three.
few things and people were able to bypass kiana’s analysis paralysis and have her move. limited edition releases, seeing someone she cares about after a long time, and, seeing someone she cares about in trouble.
from the second yeseul mentioned she and gyu had broken up, she’d been itching to leave. jogging out, running to his door, she couldn’t be bothered to be embarrassed. five - would he even be home? she needed to try, even if not; for as much as she hated yeseul, she’d heed her wish. take care of him. he needs someone despite how tough he thinks he is. later, she could have the sense of mind to get annoyed that yeseul would think she wouldn’t already know that, but right then, all she could focus on was gyujeong. her fist had lifted, perched to bang on his door, but- she couldn’t make this worse by causing a noise complaint, which might set off another ridiculous scandal.
one, single, quite bonk as she settled her forehead against the door, and brought her bag around to her front to scroll through her phone for the note with his key code, fuzzy now from the months of infrequent use. despite that, punching it in was like habit, once she started.
door closed behind her, she was already halfway to shoes off, took the half second to right her shoes and hang away her bag, before speeding off towards his room. hand on the doorframe, she caught herself before she stumbled in fully. breath still coming in harsh, kiana allowed herself something resembling a sigh before, “hey.” then, no overthinking allowed, she let herself into his room, sat on the floor in front of his bed, “i heard.”
deadline: may 21, 2022 at 11:59pm edt / may 22, 2022 at 12:59pm kst
for our fifth anniversary, here are five tasks based around the number five, each worth five points, and which you’ll have (just under) five weeks to complete.
these task completions do not count toward any monthly limits and all are completely optional.
please tag completions of this task with #famedtask12.
five development questions
— answer this development questionnaire with an answer of at least 100 words per question. this will be worth 5 points.
five-track soundtrack
— create a playlist of at least five songs inspired by one of the following prompts: 1) what songs would be on the soundtrack of a movie made about your muse’s life? 2) if your muse’s life was made into a jukebox musical, what would the song list be? 3) if your muse could have a playlist of songs play everywhere they went to set the tone, what would they be? each song on the playlist should include an explanation of at least 50 words. this will be worth 5 points.
big five personality traits
— write a headcanon of at least 400 words about how your muse fits into the big five personality traits model of openness/imagination, conscientiousness, extraversion, agreeableness, and neuroticism/emotional stability. the wikipedia page for big five personality traits can be found here. tests for the big five personality traits can be found with a quick search, with some examples being here and here, that you can take for your muse, or you can analyze where they fit on the spectrum of traits yourself without a test. this will be worth 5 points.
it’s five o’clock (somewhere)
— write a thread of at least six posts (a starter and five replies) with another muse taking place at 5 o’clock. this can be in the morning or in the evening and the time is the only dictated factor. muns have free range on everything else about the thread! this thread cannot double on another points prompt (ex. schedule thread or base online thread) and must be started after this task post goes up. this will be worth 5 points.
free choice writing
— write a solo or headcanon that somehow relates to the number five! this could be your muse reflecting on where they were five years ago compared to now or a list of the five most important locations in their life — anything as long as the number five is involved in the basis of the headcanon or solo! this will be worth 5 points.
ash: the musical is a jukebox musical dramatizing the life and career of korean pop singer ash kwon, better known by the mononym taeyong.
please picture me in the trees. i hit my peak at seven...
- seven, taylor swift
here we’re introduced to our main character. ashton kwon is a seven year old in san francisco. as he sings in unision with he friends, we see the young boy living a blissful and idyllic childhood with caring friends and loving parents. the staging is simple but celebratory — the first song of the musical comes to an end and so do his happiest days.
...someday i’ll be falling without caution but for now i’m only people watchin’.
- people watching, conan gray
ash auditions to become an idol trainee and we see this song blend together his trainee years and his early years after his debut. he’s staged in various states of writing music, moving from scribbling in a notebook to playing a keyboard in his dorm room as he daydreams and people watches. he’s driven by his deep yearning for love — or, perhaps more accurately, by his yearning for the loneliness he feels to disappear. this serves as ash’s “i want” song.
...my tolerance is going up and i’m getting numb to the feeling...
- numb to the feeling, chase atlantic
the first song of the second act introduces a much darker ash than we left in the first act with polaris winning their first daesang. we see polaris’s increasing fame get to ash and we see him living an increasingly self-destructive lifestyle of clubbing, excessive substance use, and empty trysts. he’s become numb to feelings of fame and at times even feelings of love, not only for people but also his passions.
...i’ve been sober for a year, now it’s time for me to go back to my old ways, don’t you cry for me...
- faith, the weeknd
things seem to be going better for ash after he’s forced to take some time off and rediscover his love of music, but the illusion of quitting a self-destructive lifestyle being so easy is shattered as he struggles with the temptation to return to it when the tour life makes it all too convenient to do so.
...happiness is a butterfly; try to catch it like every night. it escapes from my hands into moonlight...
- happiness is a butterfly, lana del rey
more of ash’s life unfolds as ash meets each new professional and personal high. by the end of the show, he’s lived a life of success, but the musical comes to the sobering end of an ash who seemingly still hasn’t found happiness for more than fleeting moments at a time.
In this essay, I'll do myself a favor and separate my thoughts on Eunyoung's results in the big five personality traits.
Openness to experience
I think that if she had taken this test a couple of years ago, her results for openness would be drastically different. She has always been curious and imaginative, but it was only in recent years that she started to pay closer attention to details, and let herself connect and feel all those emotions. She's a singer, so in a way, being connected to her feelings should be a must, but her real link to that only bloosomed in recent years. 67% is quite high, however, I do disagree with the part where they describe unpredictability or lack of focus. I think Eunyoung is one of the easiest people to read. She wears her feelings in her sleeves and is straight to the point most of the time. She might not have a lot done, but it's not for lack of focus but for lack of opportunity.
Conscientiousness
I'm not surprised that this one isn't higher, and that's mainly because of this sentence: "Strive for achievement against measures or outside expectations." It's not a secret that Eunyoung has been struggling for years now to know her place not only in the industry but in Calypso, too. She has always wanted to be under the public's eye, but in the moment she realized there was no use in trying to rise her popularity, Eunyoung simply stagnated.
Extraversion
Eunyoung is an extrovert. She's the person who talks to everyone in the room and shakes hands, and knows everyone's names. She knows your birthday, and even your cat's name for all that matter. The thing about her is that she is very good at small talk and sharing useless information. She likes being surrounded by people and enjoys going out for social interactions. It doesn't surprise me that it's her highest number.
Agreeableness
I recently noticed that Eunyoung is the second oldest muse in Famed, and while that wasn't always the case, I think that being the oldest in most situations, independetly of which version I brough of her has this responsible effect on her. She's not the type of person who confronts others a whole lot and prefers to solve things with as little conflict as possible. Of course, that's not a hundred percent of the time, since she's neither a judge or an angel, but she has that leadership skills that helps her in social situations.
Neuroticism
Do I wish this was lower? Yes. Do I regret pushing her to a place of easy stress constantly? Also, a yes, at least a little bit. Negative thoughts aren't a surprise for Eunyoung, and she's aware of how much this affects her. To be fair, with her historic, there wasn't a lot of reason to expect better results, and she's still waiting for the moment Calypso will go back to stake one, and they'll be in trouble again.
#famedtask12: five development questions
word count: (825+171+160+142+185) = 1483 words
tw: child abuse, child negligence, hypersexualization. general discretion is adviced cuz going through yena’s psyche is a... journey.
create a timeline of at least five important events in your muse’s life and include an explanation of the importance of each.
APRIL 2004
yena is eight. it’s a calm sunday morning, the entire family is dressed in their nicest clothes to go church, the nam sisters each dressed in delicate, frilly white dresses. amidst the ruckus of getting ready, yena slips out of the house into the backyard, hoping to quickly retrieve her hoola hoop that had gotten stuck in the cherry tree last night as they had been playing out in the yard, knowing she’ll be hopelessly scolded for being so careless with her toys if her parents find out. she doesn’t retrieve the hoola hoop, instead, yena topples out of the tree with an ugly smack, pretty dress stained blood red and grass green. when her mother finds her crying, she doesn’t comfort her or clear her wounds, she simply sends yena a withering look, stating she doesn’t have time for this before ordering the entire family to take their leave without yena. in the end its yena herself who cleans the wounds on her knees with trembling hands. → (alternatively: yena learns that keeping up pretenses will always matter more than her wellbeing)
FEBRUARY 2008
yena is twelve. it’s the first time she skips school, her and a couple friends coming to the conclusion that they can’t be bothered to go to p.e. and history and instead, taking the last couple of hours of their school day off to hang around a nearby corner store. the next morning, they’re all called into the principals office, greatly scolded and punished with cleaning duty untill the end of the month. all but yena. her friends scoff that it must be easy, being the principles daughter, skirting around trouble. hours later, curled up in a corner of her bedroom, crying her eyes out while cupping her throbbing cheek, yena doubts it’s all that easy to begin with. → (alternatively: yena learns the price of misbehaving)
JUNE 2009
yena is thirteen. it should have felt like victory, rubbing the trainee contract in her parents’ faces. she had found a way to get out and away, escape their grasp and she had done it all by herself. at the audition, they had told her she two things, a pretty face and potential (not talent, not yet, but yena didn’t yet know that was something entirely different), higher praise than either of her parents had ever given her. sure, she had anticipated they would be angry, for lying, for skipping school, for going behind their backs. she hadn’t however, anticpated her mother to stare her down as she signed the trainee contract, though not without snidely remarking that if yena wants to learn things the hard way, she’s free to but that sooner or later she’ll be right back, hopefully having learned her lesson. → (alternatively: yena learns she should have known better than to expect them to want her to stay.)
SEPTEMBER 2019
yena is twenty-three. it’s been a while since she’s last been home but she still shows up, ocassionally, to save face. she doesn’t really want to nor do her parents really want to see her but they never outright tell her to stay away. it’s been a while since she last went home, maybe that’s why she doesn’t know her sister is set to get married in a week, the news reaches her by accident more than anything else, through an old friend from school she catches up with and yena has to try her hardest not to let it show that this is surprising to her, that she wasn’t invited. she calls yein that same night to confirm, to ask why her oldest should simply pretend she doesn’t exist. yein gives her some weak excuses about figuring yena would be too busy anyway (nonsense, calpyso hasn’t promoted since march, aren’t set to promote soon either) before eventually letting her true colors show. “must we do this yena? have you not put this family through enough?” yein asks her. yena hangs up soon after that, she’s heard enough. → (alternatively: yena learns that leaving a family is easier than expected.)
NOVEMBER 2019
yena is twenty-four, as of today exactly. her parents haven’t called, none of her sisters have texted, there has been a complete radio silence since that phonecall with yein. it’s okay though, yena doesn’t mind, not when she’s squished between the other calypso members at their favorite hotpot restaurant, the table decked out in yummy foods and empty soju bottles, a small cake somewhere placed towards the end of the table in an attempt to keep it safe from their antics. sure, things are far from perfect, calypso as a group is hanging on by a thread, their career unsure and underwhelming but yena is cherished, she is wanted, she is loved. for now that is enough to build a home out of. → (alternatively: yena learns that making a family is very simple, you siply choose them, and they choose you back)
what is your muse’s fatal flaw / biggest flaw?
yena craves external validation, no, she needs it. as a deeply unloved, often ignored child growing into a hypersexualised adult, the one thing that has always kept her world spinning was the praise from others. up until this day, yena depends on outside sources to validate her, her own opinion on things doesn’t matter, it’s of no use if she thinks she looks pretty, if she thinks she sang well up on stage, if she thinks she acted well in a certain drama, none of it matters if other people don’t feel the same way. yena has long since discarded the importance of her own opinon, instead overly fixated on what everyone thinks about her. she might try to act careless all she wants, like she’s above it all with infallible self-confidence that can’t be shaken but it’s far from the truth, it could in fact not be more untrue, not when she’s dead terrified of being deemed not interesting enough, not pretty enough, not talented enough, not worth anyone’s time.
what is one of your muse’s core values? name a situation where they might consider sacrificing/changing this core value.
yena isn’t introspective enough to know her own core values, that would take an amount of self-awareness she simply lacks. if you’d ask her about her values, she’d probably come up empty. one of her main driving forces, however, is a drive for absolute autonomy yena wants to be able to whatever she wants, and not do whatever she does’t want to do, simple as that. if anything, her urge for freedom takes it a little bit too far and she could stand to be a little more nuanced in her stance. adapting this value more mildly. a way to achieve that is probably through a comitted, long term relationship. yena has been fearfully skirting around the concept of serious, comitted love for a long time, out of fear of being robbed from her autonomy once more, to be stuck adhering to someone elses terms. it would do yena good to realize that a good, healthy relationship won’t do that.
what does your character want more than anything else in the world? Is this a conscious desire or a subconscious one?
yena wants to find a place she belongs. it’s definitely a subconscious thought, as stated before yena lacks the sort of introspection needed for it but all yena really craves is to find her place, where she feels comfortable, where she doesn’t constantly have to strain herself to be considered good enough, to be considered worth loving. affection has always been a conditional currency in her life, something that had to be earned growing up, only given when adhering exactly to their parents’ expectations. becoming an idol hasn’t really improved that, the general public is fickle and infamous for going from loving to hating a public figure in a matter of moments. yena longs for a comfortable space where she doesn’t have to constantly prove herself, maybe, if she finds that, she will finally stop feeling so damn inferior all the time.
as a mun, if you could give your muse one piece of advice, what would it be?
pls stop being a fucking idiot, that’s it, that’s the life lesson. okay no i will get over myself and be nice to a muse of mine for once (1) in my life. uh, wise word of advice, yena stop always talking a big game. you can’t act like nothing can hurt you and nothing affects you and then turn around and be surprised pikachu meme when people say things that hurt you. if someone is hurtful to you, you’re gonna have to tell them and not just be like lmao i’m a bad bitch i don’t care. you do, in fact, care a lot, don’t be stupid. by ignoring these sentiments you slight not only yourself but also those around you. stop covering up serious concerns and problems with cheap jokes, it’s not cute, it’s not a good coping mechanism, no one is falling for it. i beg you nam yena, pls just learn how to talk about your feelings, it won’t kill you, your feelings are valid and all that, the fact that you have a nice ass doesn’t change anything about that.
summary: suji encounters a fan who tells her everything she’s ever wanted to hear
date: around midnight promotions
word count: 676 words
ooc note: -
while suji doesn’t like to make very bold, definite statements, she can’t seem to hide the fact that midnight is her favorite album to this day. that’s why she was more excited than usual for her promotional round. of course, it wouldn’t last long just like her other solo promotions, but she was still glad to be able to share it with her fans.
fan signs were always something that suji looked forward to. while she was aware that getting picked could be difficult, and she’d love to change how they worked, she couldn’t just change the industry with the snap of her fingers. that’s why she tried her best to ensure that every fan who came got their money’s worth. no matter what others may think, she knew that coming to her fan signs was not an easy task for her fans, and she wanted to make them feel appreciated.
this fan sign hadn’t been all too different from her others. she put on some cute hats and props that her fans handed to her and made sure to look at all the cameras. she listened to all her fans, and she was excited to hear that they also enjoyed this album quite a bit. there were a few fans who were upset that she didn’t come out with a power ballad, but they also made sure to add on that they still loved the shift in sound that she managed to comeback with.
suji’s going on with the event when fan number 57 gets on the stage. she’s in the middle of posing with one of her gifted props when the female approaches. while she found it impossible to remember every single fan who came by, she was pretty good at noticing if someone was here for the first time.
“is this your first time here?”
the fan simply nodded before pointing down at the album. she flipped over to the page they had assigned and read the sticky note they put down and signed it to their name. seeing that they weren’t saying much, suji thought that maybe they were nervous or shy, so she continued the conversation on her own.
“did it take you a long time to get here? do you live far away?” looking up, the fan nodded before clearing her throat. she was getting ready to ask her another question to keep the conversation flowing when the fan spoke up. she quickly finished up her signature and looked up, making sure to make eye contact.
“i know you probably hear this a lot, but i want to tell you that you really changed my life. your solo debut came out when i was in my last year of high school and i wanted to give up, but then i heard big mini world and gained lots of strength.”
as the fan spoke, suji could see her hands shaking so she reached over and grabbed them before giving her an encouraging smile. “i don’t usually try for fan signs, but i really wanted to tell you this in person. i was pretty lucky because i only bought one album and made it. am i not allowed to say that?”
suji chuckles as she shakes her head. “it’s totally fine, and i’m happy that i got to meet you as well. thank you for telling me that. i’ll remember it forever, i promise,” she states before offering a pinky promise. her fan manager was telling them that the fan’s time was up, and so the fan quickly stood up.
this wasn’t the first time that she’s heard such words, but they never get old. it’s exactly the reason why she started making music, and she was glad that the fan mustered up the courage and told her about it, especially because it was her debut album, one that she didn’t love to go back and listen to because everything feels so amateur.
it’s reasons like this why she continues to write, and she really does think she’ll remember the fan forever.
headcanon 005: five things that make suji feel like home
word count: 531 words
favorite blanket. this may sound a little childish, but there’s this specific blanket that suji likes to have on her bed that helps her fall asleep. it’s one that she’s had with her since her flight from england. it’s extremely plain and literally has a few flower patterns on it because it was once her mother’s, but it’s a reminder of her family. while she has some conflicts with her family (especially her parents to this day), she’s very much a family-oriented person and cares for them deeply so having the blanket around gives her ease and makes her feel comfortable. she carries it around whenever she goes overseas as well, but it’s not known to fans because she doesn’t carry it onto the plane or anything. it’s kept in her carrier because suji finds it a little embarrassing to have a favorite blanket at this age
snow globe. this has been written about before because suji wrote a song about it (fire), but she has a snowglobe sitting on her dresser in her bedroom. it was gifted to her by her sister when she went on vacation to canada. again, nothing special or especially dazzling, but it’s a reminder of her sister. the way they grew apart and then became best friends once again. the little campfire that sits in the middle of the snow globe, though not real, gives her a sense of warmth
diary. suji hasn’t stopped writing diaries since she was like in high school. it’s a habit at this point, and she can’t go to bed at night before writing something in it. it could be anything from what she ate that day to a specific sight she remembers, but she needs to write in it for her day to come to an end. it’s also a recurring theme in a lot of her writing, and her own fans know everything about her diary writing habits. it’s something that feels so entirely her so she needs to have it around
milo. her cat basically. he’s still quite a baby, and she was pretty hesitant on bringing home a cat because she wasn’t sure if she could care for it all the time, but she’s found herself in a cat mom community where she gets help if she needs to leave the country for her schedules. having milo around has definitely gifted her an indescribable joy. he’s not the most playful cat nor does he like snuggle up to her all the time but simply having him around has boosted her mood up
hand-drawn portrait gifted by a fan. this was probably one of the first gifts that she ever received. it was handed to her at a fansign, and she still remembers what she felt when she first got it. they say that drawing takes a lot of love and dedication, and she could feel that with this portrait. there’s no way that the fan could have drawn her in so detail if they didn’t love her, and she could feel that love directly within the painting. it’s hung in her living room, and it acts as a reminder of the unconditional love and support her fans send her everyday to motivate her to continue to work harder
