THE ART OF LETTING GO (Quest for LOVE)
To be honest, I’m never brave enough to write about this topic, since I also struggling with myself in this situation. It just that there’s something happened to me yesterday, makes me want to write about it. I do not wish to write too long on this (let just hope..), I just need to let this things off my chest because it has been bothering me for quite a while now. I wish I can swipe it off just like that because it’s really bothering me and trapped inside.
Why are we so bad at letting go? If you ask me, to be honest, my answer will be; there’s a part in me that still holding back. I’m the kind of person that have strong sentimental values towards everything in my life and when it come to person I’ll attached with them deeply in my heart whether it’s a friends, family, special person or maybe just random people that I saw. I’m proud that I have this kind of character and feeling in me because it makes me take people feelings seriously. Some people may see it as a weak character. As for me, I believe it’s the other way round, BUT.. it can be unhealthy to you if you can’t control it. People may take advantages of you.
“Some people believe holding on and hanging in there are signs of great strength. However, there are times when it takes much more strength to know when to let go and then do it.” -Anne Landers
Back to the topic, letting go is all about acceptance where you allows yourself to no longer fight or give resistance to something or someone that is the way it is. As for my case, it was someone. Was it about my past relationship? The answer is yes, and yes I’m currently single. So, I really know and much more aware of how it feels like to love and be loved the same way. AND... the consequence of it, I also know how it feels to be completely utterly shattered. I’m not the wise person to talk about this love stuff. I do believe different people have different understanding of love and I strongly believe that the people we fall in love with can complete each other to be better together and sometimes they might be reflecting the kind of person we are.
I’m not going to list out the characteristics that I wish for my significant other to have. It’s enough for me if he values family (mine and himself), religion, knowledge and ambition. Bear in mind my dear ladies, if you’re serious to pursue a relationship, please look for a man; who can understand and know how to be responsible. Responsibility is extremely important my dear, man who takes responsibility seriously has the slight chance to neglect it. But, don’t put it all into your partner, you also need to be a woman; who have the maturity to be responsible towards yourself and the relationship you pursues. Remember, relationship is about two people participation.
I have been single for almost a year now, and I only realize it yesterday that I’m not fully letting all go. I thought I forgot everything and accept the things the way it is until yesterday I feel like I’m shattering all over again when I lost a few things related to my past which I kept this entire time. To view it from the positive side, I guess this is the sign, the sign that I should really, truly letting it all go and start fresh with my life. If there is anything a relationship has taught me in the past, it’ll be the importance of maturity. It’s reflects on the behavior of a person in everything, from the way of thinking to how they act in handling a situation in a relationship. A healthy relationship should help bring the best out of you, spiritually, mentally, emotionally and not leading you towards the haraam (Muslim practice).
For anyone that felt the same way as I do, let’s be better together. Stop holding on and start to let go. I know you've tried your best to manage everything but please accept that some parts of our lives just won't turn out like we expected to be. There are some things in our lives were untouchable to us, but not to Allah. So reach for Him, put all faith to Him. You've done you part and let Allah decide and manage the rest. While waiting for that, put your highest trust in Allah. One prayer at a time. Take this opportunity to focus on our personal development and fix our relationship with Allah, that’s the most important things. Back to Him, cry to Him, He always listen and forgive all of our sins without even judging it.
In the meantime, don’t forget to take care of ourselves. Build up a good character, healthy, spiritually, intelligence, learn new skills, read more, travel and much more time for ourselves until the right person come and be our companion.
As for me, I am personally afraid to be in a relationship again. But, when the time comes and Allah sent the right one for me, I hope the guy I end up with will be proud of me, I hope he also pray everyday for himself and for us the way I do. I believe Allahu Rabbi plan the best for us. May Allah help us in striving our best self, make it easy for us and guide us to find our way to each other. We’re in each other all along, keep me in your prayers as I do you.
p/s: miss the girls terribly (in&out pic)
