#fb saga

[mechafxr]

THE DICK IS HERE [it WAS the one from the photoset, hella]

they packed a blue silicone egg in with him as an extra

the question that remains: Whose

[mechafxr]

dankassbiskits replied to your post “THEY’RE SENDING OUT THE DICK TOMORROW”

good lord should I email them about mine again?? I don't want to sound like a pain in the ass (hurr see what I did there ain't I clever) but this is getting ridiculous tbh :I

I’d recommend it!!! And specifically mention that an email from them might not have gone through/got eaten because of an attached dick-picture, because that seems to be the biggest problem on my orders.

Also, I feel like letting myself come through as pretty frustrated in my last email didn’t hurt. I always try to be polite and my previous tone’s been real mild and along the lines of “oh, ok uh, I haven’t heard from you, but get back to me when you can, no rush” [where the assumption is that they’ll try super hard to fix their fuckup regardless of tone], but if stuff’s getting mixed up or whatever over there, it’s way harder to ignore/forget about a customer who’s starting to get mad about something you legit fucked up on. I know I was never in dick sales, but I feel like that’s standard to any customer service position.

Also, maybe try out some mild guilt-tripping? I remember what theme you said you asked for on yours, and you have my permission to crib the "I need a shoulder to cry on, and I need that shoulder to be a dick, and I need that dick to look like it got chopped off a robot” line I ended my last email with, ‘cause that apparently worked.

[mechafxr]

[tops off a rambling email about a missing robot cock with a stale, unfunny meme] now that’s some good Nick Emails™

[mechafxr]

o-bi replied to your post “I’m so done with that polite business tone I’ve used with fb before,...”

i got confused for a second and i was wondering why you were emailing facebook about a missing robot cock

wouldn’t you

(honestly I just don’t feel like showing up in the search results)

[mechafxr]

I’m so done with that polite business tone I’ve used with fb before, it puts me on edge, business-politeness gets me so anxious. it’s why I haven’t been keeping up on emailing them as much.

from here on out, they’re getting the exact same writing style as my skype contacts. they’re getting paid to read that mail, they can deal.

how many times can you say “youse guys“ in an email to strangers about a missing robot cock before they start thinking you’re doing it ironically

[mechafxr]

so like, on a scale of 1 to 10, how likely do you think it is that I could shake fb down for that mis-pour of my order I didn't ask for any compensation on the last mix-up, I feel I am owed at least one extra subtandard dick at this point