In this entry: him. Unfortunately, just him. Feel free to ignore. So... It has been something like nine months ago that my first boyfriend and I broke up. Since then, we've had more ups and downs than I can count on my fingers. Which is funny, because we only dated for thirteen days. But the truth is, he and I really like, connected and I opened up to him, which is really hard for me and I guess that was why it was so important to me to fight to have him in my life. So he and I have become pretty good friends again. We can talk the same way that we used to. We will text every now and then. And I am okay. I'm happy enough, I guess. But I'm not completely over him. And I feel like I've been really annoyed because he's been chasing all these girls who wouldn't give him the time of day, who don't know him like I do. And it's like, part of me wants to try to make it work with him again but now he has all this drama dragging behind him and I can deal with the haters, but I don't know if I could actually put all the crap aside and not allow it to interfere... And then he unfollowed me on Twitter and Instagram. And I'm not really the type to live my life on social media, but he is, so I'm really confused about where we stand, ya know? I spend all this time pretending he was next to me and replaying and recreating our past and fabricating a future and I just think that I really miss being cared about. I miss being kissed and having my hand held and having someone dream about a future with me and plan for things. It doesn't even matter. He's a senior. In a few months, he'll be off to college and even though I'm sure he'll be in state, we probably won't be as close as we are now. I honestly think that I just want someone and I don't know how to say that without sounding desperate or lonely or something along those lines, because I'm not. I just... I don't know. Any thoughts?