#featherypen

[featherypen]

I never really noticed how many people were rooting for us to break up until he told me.  "You know that they were saying we wouldn't make it?" he murmured softly, as if that made it hurt less. "They don't like us as a couple." And oh how much it hurt to think that the people I thought I could trust would say that. Especially after I was cheated on. I never thought I'd be that girl. "She's the one so-and-so thought wasn't good enough." And I remember how everybody's face would immediately fall into pity when I told them.  So it hurts a little bit to think that the people who felt so bad for me then would wish for that pain to come back.

you never realize how much that knife in your back hurts until someone points it out//excerpt from a book i’ll write #46

[featherypen]

It hurts, it really does. And I know it shouldn't anymore. But why do people seem to care so much as to why you're getting hurt, when nobody would do the same for me when I was in the same situation months ago?

and to think I call those people my friends//excerpt from a book i’ll never write #45

[featherypen]

Your writing is so lovelyyy! It gives me the shivers. Dont ever say most of it isn't good

thank you!

[featherypen]

I get these random chest pains these days, so bad i can't walk. There are times when i wake up & I can't breathe. I've not slept in 2 days. I can't tell my parents anything. Today I just couldn't take it and I broke down. I can't stop crying. Help me

okay, well if the pain is this bad you need to tell an adult you trust or have somebody take you to the ER. something this serious could be something with your heart or lungs. please try and get help for your sake.

[featherypen]

One day all your old best friends are going to stop talking to you. And that girl that you had your first crush on will move away. And your childhood pet will finally sink into their last dream. It makes you think. It makes you think about how shitty it all really is. Yeah, things are kind of looking up, but you can't have the careless wonder you did in your childhood. There are no more knights to defend your castle (they couldn't stand being around you anymore). And you'll feel hollow and lonely and just foolish. Everybody goes through this, right? You should be happy. Things could be worse. And you finally found somebody that you can be happy with but all you can do is think about how you're just awful to them and why they haven't left you yet. And I guess you could say that you started thinking like that the first time you were picked last for the kickball game, or how you didn't get invited to that slumber party, or maybe it was the way that somebody you used to be close to would stop talking to you altogether. That maybe you weren't good enough, or maybe you never were. You'll think that you're over it, that it won't hurt you anymore. But you'll see an old picture, drive by an old hang out, or smell an old smell, and then you realize—it never really stops hurting. It hasn't yet.

maybe i'm just being nostalgic//excerpt from a book i'll never write #44

[featherypen]

i'm just a little late for this, but i've got over 3,000 followers!!

[featherypen]

I can't get a guy and it has been one year. Why is this? We weren't even together but it's making me insane. What can I do to forget him

i’m so sorry i only just answered. I haven’t been on tumblr much lately.

i understand what you’re going through (something similar happened to me), and i’m so sorry.

the best you can do is try and distract yourself from thinking of him. go out with friends, start binge watching a new show, start working out (it hurts when you start but your body will thank you!!). you can’t make this process speed up, it’s just something you’ll have to go through.

don’t forget to stop talking to him. try not to be anywhere that he will be. seeing him will only make it hurt even more. it’s like rubbing salt into a fresh wound.

someday you’ll see a picture of him on instagram or facebook and you’ll see that he’s happy and going somewhere and you’ll be happy for him. that’s when you know you’ve finally moved on. once this happens, don’t be afraid to say hi if you see him out when you’re shopping. tell him you’re glad to see how great he’s doing.

this is a process and i know that you will get better. sunnier days are on their way!

[featherypen]

He lives in different culture, religion and country. I think I love him. But should I proceed?

well, i’m assuming that he feels the same about you, so if not, i apologize.

i’m not going to lie to you, long distance relationships are hard. you both need to want to commit to this relationship. communication is a must, too. if you are both able to talk over the phone or video chat at a certain time, make sure you do it.

and for the religion part, you’ll both just have to learn to accept your religious differences and respect them. maybe you both can try a little bit of each other’s religious traditions (so long as it doesn’t go against either of your beliefs), like having a moment of silence or meditating.

honestly, i can’t tell you what to do. but if you both want this, go for it! there’s no reward without risk. 💖