July 2007 vs October 2018. Frankly I think I’m killing it with the ageing thing. Mostly because when I look at that fresh faced girl with the amazing hair (god I miss that hair), I can’t see myself at all. I keep looking harder and closer at it, saying ‘Who is she? Where am I in this photo?’ And that’s how I felt at the time. Looking at myself at photos and in the mirror, I didn’t see myself, I didn’t know who I was. All I could see was all the ways I was failing to be what everyone around me wanted me to be, and trying so hard to be what they asked for. That girl was happy when she saw photos that made her look beautiful by society’s standards; she never even thought about whether she looked like herself. When I look at the photo of me now, I see myself. Now when I look in the mirror I see the person I have always wanted to be. A person who knows herself, who is proud of herself; a person who cares what those around her think but not at the expense of her sense of self. I see me. It’s not about how many more lines there are on my face, how thick my lashes were back then or whether I’ve put on or lost weight. It’s about how I’ve aged internally, the work I’ve done to get to this place of acceptance and how happy it makes me to see myself reflected back in photos. Both of these women are beautiful, but only one of them believes it, and that’s what age has brought me. #firstvslast #profilepics https://www.instagram.com/p/BsktGkElmmP/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=5eqt3qsw8tu4