#fishercon

[infinit8worlds]

i didn’t know happiness could feel like this — not loud or overwhelming or like something i had to chase before it slipped away. it felt… gentle. steady. like waking up and realizing the thing you’ve been reaching for is already in your hands. for so long, being in love with @fishercon meant wanting more than i could have, or pretending i didn’t. it meant confusion and timing and wishing the universe would give us one break, just one. but now, when i look at him — really look at him — it feels different. i don’t see the distance that used to live behind his eyes, or the walls he used so carefully to protect himself. i see him. the boy i loved at fourteen, the one who broke my heart at sixteen, and the version of him now — softer around the edges, steadier, like he finally stopped fighting the world and himself. and maybe the biggest surprise is how safe it feels. how natural. how right. there’s no knot in my stomach wondering what he’s thinking. no guessing. no walking around the parts of him he was afraid to show. he lets me in now. completely. and i didn’t realize how much i’d needed that until i had it.

sometimes i still catch myself waiting for something to go wrong, because that’s how it always used to be with us — a high followed by a fall. but then he reaches for my hand without thinking, or says my name in that soft, quiet way, like it’s a secret he’s finally allowed to keep… and the worry just disappears. we’re happy. we really are. and the best part is: it doesn’t feel temporary. it feels like something we built, something we fought for, something we grew into. conrad and i — we finally feel like the version of us we were always supposed to be. and god… i love him. not in the old, aching way, but in a way that feels like breathing. like home. like he’s not just part of my life — he’s woven into every piece of it. ❛❛ hey, ❜❜ i say, nudging his arm lightly, just because i want to touch him. ❛❛ you know… i keep thinking about how far we’ve come. how different everything feels now. ❜❜ he looks at me, that small smile he only uses with me tugging at his mouth, and i feel that warmth spread through my whole chest. ❛❛ i used to be so scared we’d always be this… almost, ❜❜ i admit. ❛❛ like we’d get close, and then something would slip through our fingers again. ❜❜ i shake my head, smiling a little. ❛❛ but we didn’t lose it this time. we didn’t lose us. ❜❜ his hand finds mine, and i squeeze it, grounding myself in the feel of him. ❛❛ i’m really happy too, conrad, ❜❜ i tell him softly. ❛❛ and i want you to know… i’m here. i’m not going anywhere. choosing you — being with you — it feels right. it feels easy. ❜❜ i lean forward, brushing my nose against his cheek. ❛❛ and i love us like this. i love you like this. and i love that we finally get to keep each other. ❜❜

[bellsconk]

@fishercon sent: “You’re going to be an amazing mom.”

oh,  c'mon  —  that's  cheating!  this  was  supposed  to  be  cuter,  she'd  spent  an  entire  weekend  binge  watching  full  house  with  taylor  over  zoom,  gushing  over  what  stupidly  themed  foods  to  cook.  baby  corn,  baby  back  ribs,  baby  carrots!  the  list  went  on  and  on.  now  their  fridge  is  ridiculously  packed  and  she's  nicked  enough  recipes  from  pinterest  to  make  some  solid  effort.  was  it  the  ice  cream?  scooped  up  with  gherkins  instead  of  a  spoon,  emptied  out  by  the  tub  full  ...  or  the  test  she's  damn  sure  was  well  hidden?  sanitized  and  tucked  away  in  a  shoe  box  shoved  under  the  back  seat  of  her  car.  someone  with  far  more  patience  had  wrapped  it  up,  corners  crisp  and  tidy,  white  paper  adorably  printed  with  pink  and  blue  rattles  —  tied  off  neat  with  a  bow.  he's  still  getting  it.  along  with  the  mug  she'd  found  on  amazon.

❝     this  was  supposed  to  be  an  entire  evening's  worth  of  hints  and  cute  innuendos.     ❞     she  wanted  to  see  that  same  misty  delight  light  up  his  eyes  like  when  her  pills  were  flushed  —  all  that  barely  contained  longing  had  somewhere  to  go  now.  he  spilled  into  her  and  she  blistered  bright  around  the  edges,  too  happy  to  reprimand  all  his  keen  knowing.  bowl  shoved  aside  she  leans  across  the  table,  cupping  his  cheek  to  allow  a  thumb  to  ease  along  his  chin.     ❝     how  long  have  you  known?     ❞

[story1ines]

fishercon asked: if you were in my situation, what would you do? for taylor jewel.

taylor had been holding it in for days — that gnawing frustration sitting right under her ribs, the kind that made it hard to breathe when she looked at him. it had started small, a quiet ache she thought would fade if she ignored it long enough, but it only grew heavier each time conrad showed up like nothing had happened. he had that same calm, unreadable expression, the one that always made her wonder if he even felt half the things everyone else did. he looked steady on the outside, always did, but maybe that was the problem — he acted like the storm never touched him. but it had. it touched everyone. it wrecked belly. and taylor had watched it happen in real time — the quiet nights, the puffy eyes belly tried to hide, the fake smiles she’d force just to get through a conversation. she’d heard the way her voice cracked when she said she was fine, how she’d change the subject before she broke. taylor knew what fine really looked like, and it wasn’t that. she hadn’t planned to say anything. she told herself to let it go, that it wasn’t her place. but the second she saw him standing there — hands in his pockets, pretending the world didn’t weigh on him — something inside her snapped. maybe it was anger. maybe it was heartbreak for her best friend. or maybe it was just exhaustion — from watching the same story play out over and over again while conrad acted like he didn’t already know how it would end.

she crossed her arms, not to seem defensive but to keep herself from shaking. ❝ do you even know what it’s been like for her? ❞ she asked, voice low but cutting through the space between them. ❝ you broke her, conrad. she cried herself to sleep for weeks, and the worst part is she still defends you. she still tries to make excuses, like somehow it’s okay because you didn’t mean to hurt her. but it doesn’t matter if you meant it or not — you did. ❞ her breath hitched, more from anger than tears. ❝ you can’t just disappear when things get hard and expect people to wait for you to figure it out. ❞ he didn’t say anything. not at first. he just stood there, quiet, his face unreadable but his eyes… tired. heavy. like he was carrying something no one else could see. for a second, taylor almost felt bad — almost. but then she remembered belly’s voice, soft and cracked at three in the morning, whispering she didn’t know how to stop missing him. taylor stepped closer, the frustration spilling over now, uncontained. ❝ you think she’s just gonna run into the sunset with you because you suddenly remember she exists? ❞ she said, her tone sharper now, trembling with everything she’d been holding back. ❝ because that’s not how this works. you don’t get to show up and act like timing’s the only thing that’s ever been wrong. she’s been here. she’s been trying. and you? you’ve been everywhere but with her. ❞

the words hung in the air between them, heavy and raw. he finally looked up, really looked at her, and there was something like guilt flickering behind his eyes. his voice came out quieter than she expected. if you were in my situation, what would you do? taylor stared at him for a long moment, studying the cracks behind that calm exterior he wore like armor. ❝ if i were you, ❞ she said softly, but there was nothing gentle in her tone, ❝ i’d stop hiding behind all the reasons why i can’t, and i’d start showing up for the people who still want me around. i’d admit that i hurt her — that i hurt myself too — and then i’d try to fix it before it’s too late. because you don’t get to love someone halfway, conrad. not her. not belly. she deserves more than someone who only shows up when he feels ready. ❞ she blinked, exhaling the weight of everything she’d been holding inside for months. ❝ so if i were in your situation, ❞ she said, quieter now, her voice softening just enough to let the truth through, ❝ i’d stop waiting for the perfect moment. i’d finally decide what the hell i want — before she decides she’s done waiting. ❞ and for the first time since she started talking, conrad didn’t look like he had an answer. he just stood there, small in the silence he’d built for himself, while taylor turned away, her chest still burning from everything she didn’t say out loud — that belly deserved more, and that maybe, somewhere deep down, conrad already knew that.

[harmfuls]

tears   taste   bitter   as   salt   -   water   under   the   collapse   of   a   heavy   wave   .         this   cataclysmic   garden   ,    this   graveyard   of   souls   :     it   haunts   like   terrors   in   the   night   .       buried   beneath   your   breast   like   a   corroded   -   anchor   piercing   your   heart   .

wake   up   .    wake   up   .    wake   up   .       for   a   moment   ,    you   don’t   know   if   you’re   talking   to   yourself   or   your   comatose   -   brother   .

trembling   digits   coil   into   cotton   -   fabric   of   a   ghost   .       no   ,    not   a   ghost   ,    he’s   real   .     he’s   here   .     ‘   you’re   here   ,   ’       an   attempt   to   confirm   reality   while   tears   continuing   to   cascade   down   swollen   cheeks   .       the   cradle   of   his   hand   to   jowl   is   a   warm   -   comfort   .     one   she   leans   into   with   desperation   .     ‘   you’re   really   here   ...   ’       but   this   time   ,    solace   coats   scarlet   maw   and   head   rests   against   the   sternum   of   a   boy   :     the   life   -   raft   she   needed   to   rescue   her   from   the   violent   seas   of   tragedy   .

      ❪     @fishercon    says    ,    sender    wipes    away    the    receiver's    falling    tears    with    their    thumb    and    whispers    ,    “    i'm    here    .    "     ❫

[bellyflops-moved]

CLOSED STARTER: @fishercon / (semi plotted)

Sometimes Belly wonders if you can love two people at the same time. Deep down she knows it'll always be a different feeling for each of them no matter what. She cared about Jeremiah, so much, but it was possible he was right. That if Conrad reached out, she couldn't help but to reach back again.

She thinks of everything that's transpired over just a few days. The kiss, confessions, the hurt. And of course, Conrad's hushed words in the hotel. Was it selfish that part of her really did want it to be truly real? Despite all the consequences she knew would follow? She could only ignore all of this for so long.

And so now, here she was, eyes studying Conrad. Like she's searching for a sign, for some kind of answer that she's afraid he won't provide himself. "I need you to be honest," she says. It mattered now more than anything. "Did you mean it? What you said last night. Because I really need to know."

[bellsconk]

@fishercon sent: “ you know, if you moved in we wouldn’t keep having to say goodbye like this. ”

subtle,  fisher,  real  subtle  —  was  it  her  clothes  in  the  laundry  hamper?  or  maybe  how  she  stands  there,  toothbrush  dangling  between  fingertips  looking  for  where  he'd  stored  her  toothpaste  this  time?  it  could  even  be  the  french  press  which  had  somehow  permanently  become  part  of  the  kitchen  decor,  or  her  sandals  neatly  tucked  beside  his  own  on  the  shoe  rack.  this  half-lived  atmosphere  made  his  eyes  just  a  bit  too  bright  and  yearning,  like  he  was  waiting  for  something  that  must  feel  inevitable.  moving  from  paris  back  to  the  states  had  been  hard  but  worth  it  —  plane  rides  were  no  longer  necessary,  and  trading  off  visits  became  far  easier.  permanence  wasn't  scary,  deciding  what  came  next  could  be.     ❝     it's  adorably  frustrating  when  you're  logical,  conrad  fisher.     ❞

california  was  great  for  sports  sports  psychology  —  but  so  was  florida,  texas,  and  even  colorado.  there's  no  excuse  for  not  moving  in  or  further  intertwining  their  lives  other  than  maybe  this  just  isn't  the  place  for  her  (  and,  yeah,  maybe  it  is.  )     ❝     you  really  want  me  in  your  face  24/7  in  this  tiny  doctor  chic  apartment?     ❞     with,  you  know,  limited  counter  space  and  a  closet  that  would  have  more  dresses  than  shirts  or  slacks?  pivots,  lower  back  resting  against  sink,  head  cocking  slowly.     ❝     my  hair  is  always  going  to  be  in  the  drain  and  i  can't  promise  not  to  take  over  the  fridge  ...     ❞

[boyblooded]

@fishercon ⊹₊⋆ plotted .ᐟ

ִֶָ. ..𓂃 ࣪ ִֶָ🪽་༘࿐ ˗ˏˋ not the easiest turn of events to deal with . what was meant to just be a quick three day weekend away with his estranged brother , back on monday for his law school interview , had turned into their student apartment burning to the ground , with sam &&* his roommate both making it out in time ━ without jess . the cops hadn't been able to find any signs of arson , or breaking and entering : the only suspect they had was sam . suspicious timing , they were calling it , that he'd gotten home the night of the fire . it wasn't exactly like he could tell conrad or the cops the truth , either . he just wanted to be normal , live a normal life . this was unfortunately a wake - up call that that kind of life was never meant for him .

he'd been ignoring his phone for two days at this point , alternating being taken in for questioning and trying not to fail his last week of classes . ( not that it mattered , he'd be dropping out soon , but no one knew that part but sam . ) but colliding straight into his former roommate coming around a corner on campus meant running &&* hiding was no longer a viable option . ❛ shit , my bad dude , ❜ a grumble , trying to make sure neither of them dropped anything . ❛ i'm uh , i'm sorry i haven't been around . i should've checked on you . it's just been crazy . are you okay ? ❜

[witchyxwoo]

@fishercon // closed starter from amelia conklin

amelia had been stuck on her laptop for the past hour and a half, having paused her work just for a brief bathroom break. she'd been so busy editing pictures on photoshop for an event that she hadn't really noticed the time. instead her eyes remained glued to the screen as she went between fixing curves, shadows, and various highlights. there wasn't a hard deadline for them to want their pictures back, but the work was important to her nonetheless. however, when she heard her stomach suddenly growl she couldn't help but laugh. "oh wow, kind of forgot to eat a snack after lunch," she laughed again.