Pairing: Kaidan/Shepard/Ashley (Willshenko)Prompt: ‘A Distracting Kiss’
I’m going to interpret ‘ME3 darlings’ as this beautiful poly trio here, since they are currently the loves of my trilogy life~ Also this one ended up being over twice a long as I’m trying to keep them.. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
EDIT: 5-16-17, revamped and rewrote it a bit.AO3 Link
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“Dr. Chakwas told me Shepard skipped dinner again,” Kaidan says as he steps into the Normandy’s elevator alongside Ashley, and he hears her sigh as she hits the button that would take them up to the captain’s quarters with more force than usual. She’s clearly annoyed, probably just as annoyed as Kaidan is worried, but it’s the kind that she gets only when she worries about John, and though she’s loathed to admit it, she’s not nearly as good at keeping some of her emotions in check as Kaidan is, especially when to came to their partner and commander.
“That’s at least two days in a row then..” Ashley muses, brow furrowing as she looks over at him. “Have you seen him at all since they got back from Rannoch?” He hadn’t, and Kaidan lets out a soft sigh as he shakes his head.
“Only in passing,” he tells her, and Ashley’s frown deepens. At first Kaidan didn’t understand it; he’d thought Rannoch had been a success. John had done what so many in the galaxy had thought impossible and ended a war that had lasted centuries, spiting all the naysayers in the process. Peace had been brokered between the Quarians and the Geth, a somewhat shaky peace, with many wounds still needing to be healed and trust to be earned to both sides, but it was a victory nonetheless.
Yet they’d barely seen any sign of John since he returned to the Normandy yesterday afternoon, and Garrus and Tali both came back with him a little quieter than usual they hadn’t voiced any pressing concerns about Shepard to him or Ashley. They’d returned to their usual work stations, John had gone into the comm room to make his reports to Admiral Hackett, and since then he’d largely stayed holed up in his quarters, aside from a brief trip to take out some low-level Cerberus lab earlier that day, but even then he’d taken James and Liara with him instead of either of them.
“Ash.. You don’t think he’s avoiding us, do you?” Kaidan asks with worry as soon as the thought crosses his mind. Beside him Ashley frowns, and looks thoughtful for just a moment before she shakes her head and reaches over to give Kaidan’s shoulder an affectionate squeeze.
“Actually, I think this might be about Legion,” she answers, and Kaidan blinks as it clicks in his mind. He recalls Shepard’s geth companion, who’d sacrificed itself in the end to ensure the peace between Tali’s people and its own had a chance. Neither he nor Ashley had known Legion very well, but Kaidan knew enough to know that John must’ve still been feeling the loss, and though Kaidan didn’t like to admit it, John tended to keep the two of them at arm’s length for a day or so whenever he lost another ally. He’d already lost Thane, Mordin, and now Legion..
Kaidan feels some of the loss of that particular Geth unit himself despite the fact that they’d practically been strangers. Legion had been there for Shepard, fighting alongside him and the rest of his ragtag team against the Collectors when he and Ashley hadn’t, after all.. It was one of the few regrets still bothering him to this day, and Kaidan felt that he owed all of Shepard’s companions from that suicide mission a debt, and now there was one more casualty he’d never be able to repay.
“..Kaidan?”
He blinks as he becomes aware that Ashley is talking, and he turns his head to see her watching him with a look of concern. She reaches up to cup his left cheek and Kaidan leans into it with a soft sigh, a small smile tugging at his mouth when he feels her gently brush her thumb under his eye.
“You okay over there, LT?” she asks before giving him a small smile. “Should I start worrying about both of you?”
“I’m all right Ash, I’m just.. I’m worried about John,” Kaidan sighs, “You know how he can get when he’s stressed, or mourning.”
Ashley sighs quietly as she nods in understanding, being the only other person aside from Kaidan who frequently saw John at his lowest, but then she smiles over at Kaidan and leans in to press a warm kiss to his lips. He leans into it immediately, eyes closing at the soft contact of her lips, and he lets out a quiet noise of protest when she draws back, his mouth momentarily trying to chase hers. Ashley’s still smiling at him when he opens his eyes, looking away only when the elevator door slides open.
“That’s why we’re here, LT,” Ashley replies, giving his butt a playful swat before she walks out into the short hallway between the elevator and the captain’s quarters, and Kaidan shakes his head, smiling to himself as he follows her. He’s a little surprised when the door slides open at their close proximity; he’d half-expected it to be locked so maybe that was a good sign?
The room is dark though, with most of the light coming from the massive fish tank, and even that seemed to be set on the dimmest setting.
John’s sitting at his desk with his back to them. He perks up a little at the sound of his door opening but doesn’t look up from the array of data pads spread out in front of him, and Kaidan can see that most of them are reports regarding the war efforts on Palaven and Tuchanka. He exchanges a concerned look with Ashley before they stride further into the room, coming to a stop behind John’s seat, and when John finally looks back at them it’s just a brief, distracted glance.
A soft grunt is all the greeting that he gives them before his attention is back on the data pad. He looks exhausted, like he’d done nothing all day but read over the incoming casualty and damage reports. Which, knowing John, was exactly what he’d been doing.
Ashley frowns, more displeased about the state John was in than she is about the lack of his attention. She moves over to stand on John’s right side while Kaidan stays put on the left, and their commander lets out a noise of discontent when Ashley leans down to pull his data pad out of his hands, dropping it unceremoniously onto the desk.
“I’m trying to work,” John huffs, but there’s no real heat behind his words. No noticeable energy of any kind behind it, actually; he sounds like he’s running on fumes at this point, and Kaidan can feel the tension in his body as he reaches down to rub a hand along John’s shoulders. John frowns, reaching for his data pad again, and sighs when this time Kaidan pushes it further away from him. “You two ganging up on me now?”
“Only when you make us, Skipper,” Ashley replies promptly, her hand brushing against Kaidan’s as she reaches over to gently rub at John’s stiff shoulders as well. “C’mon, you’ve been up here for hours staring at these things. You need to give yourself a break.”
“I can’t, I need to finish-” John starts to argue but his words are cut off when Ashley leans down, pressing her lips to his in a slow but demanding kiss, and Kaidan smiles a little when he sees John immediately melting into it in spite of his interrupted protests. A few beats pass before Ashley breaks the kiss, and though John’s eyes still flicker over towards his discarded reports Kaidan feels the tension in his shoulders loosen just a little under his hand.
“You need to relax..” Ashley says, her eyes flicking over to Kaidan. John follows her gaze, just barely meeting Kaidan’s eyes before he’s leaning forward too, capturing John’s mouth in a soft kiss of his own. John lets out a soft breath through his nose, becoming more receptive to the kiss as the seconds pass, and Kaidan feels him brush his hand against his hip before settling onto his lower back.
Kaidan hums softly as he holds the kiss for a few long moments, one hand coming up to trace along the stubbled curve of his commander’s jaw, and he’s so tempted to deepen the kiss further before he finally breaks it and draws his head back, watching through hooded eyes as Ashley cups two fingers under the commander’s chin, turning his head back towards her and claiming his mouth once more.
Kaidan loves it when they do this, and smiles to himself as the two of them go back and forth over the course of the next few minutes, their kisses with John ranging from slow and steady to rough and heated, and John’s protests are long since forgotten by all three of them as he whimpers and groans into their mouths. Ashley traces a hand along John’s chest, nails grazing him through the fabric of his thin shirt and causing him to actually growl against her mouth, while Kaidan’s hand cups the back of John’s head when it’s his turn, controlling the angle to make their kisses that much better.
He doesn’t know how long their shared make-out lasts but Kaidan’s glad to see that John’s no longer paying attention to his reports, instead looking back and forth between the two of them with, cheeks just a little flushed and eyes visibly dilated.
It’s a damn good look on him.
Without taking their hands off of John, Kaidan and Ashley both straighten up, gazes meeting for a second before their lips crash together in a rough kiss of their own. He feels Ashley smile against his mouth, giving his lower lip a playful nip, and below them John lets out a soft groan. They draw away from each other, both smirking down at him.
“Cheaters..” John mumbles before Ashley’s mouth returns to his, but he’s smiling now as he lets himself get lost in another lazy kiss with her. Ashley breaks away from it long enough to meet Kaidan’s watchful gaze, giving him a pointed look as she gestures to John with her head, which Kaidan answers with an affirmative nod.
“Just think of it as us leveling the field,” Kaidan says as he moves around to stand directly behind John’s chair, his palms rubbing along the tops of John’s shoulders before he gives the stiff muscles a light squeeze, and the sudden groan it draws from John has both Kaidan and Ashley grinning.
“He’s right, Skipper,” Ashley purrs, kissing John between words. “We’ve gotta play dirty sometimes if we want to have a chance against that stubborn streak of yours.”
“I’m not stubb-” John starts before Ashley cuts him off again, and the kisses between are becoming noticeably more heated but Kaidan tries to focus on easing away John’s physical tensions rather than get too caught up in the show between his partners. Ashley, meanwhile, seems to notice that Kaidan is trying to keep himself focused so her kisses slow down, becoming shorter and almost chaste compared to her usual ones, the kind that leave both of her men panting for breath and dizzy from her taste.
Either way, she keeps John’s mouth occupied as Kaidan moves his hands lightly along the base of his neck, making slow but firm presses with his fingers that slowly move further out towards John’s upper arms before coming back in, and Kaidan alternates between his neck and shoulders, finding the spots with the most tension of focusing on them.
Each slow press and squeeze of his hands is drawing deep, content noises up from John’s chest. Kaidan sees Ashley smiling against his lips each time she hears one, and the combination of her pleased expression and John’s growing relaxation under their attention fills Kaidan’s chest with that deep warmth he only gets around the two of them, and he finds himself unable to keep a smile off his own face as he resumes his task.
The knots in John’s shoulders are numerous and stubborn but Ashley distracts him from any pains as Kaidan carefully works them away with his thumbs, though he does take the time to lean down and pepper some soft kisses along John’s neck and ear, and he feels another rush of satisfaction as John seems to melt under his touch, weeks of aches and tension being chased away, and as someone who received frequent head massages from the two of them Kaidan knows how good he must feel.
Finally, the massage is finished, and John breaks away from Ashley’s kissing to let out a deep sigh, sinking back into the seat. He looks a little dazed; lips beautifully swollen from the steady stream of kisses and a faint but visible blush still on his face, making the light freckles across his nose seem just a shade darker.
Kaidan smiles again, giving John’s shoulders one more satisfied rub, and he’s glad to feel that the stiffness and knots are gone now, and when he looks up at Ashley she’s beaming at him, maybe looking a bit self-satisfied with her own work but the affection for him still burns brightly in her eyes.
A light grip on his right wrist draws Kaidan’s attention back down to John, and he looks down in time to see him pulling Kaidan’s hand off of his shoulder and towards his face, pressing a few light kisses to his knuckles before he leans his head back, the top of his head brushing lightly against Kaidan’s stomach as he does, and there’s a new shine in those brilliant blue eyes of his as he looks up at the two of them.
“Thanks,” John says quietly, and he still sounds so tired but it’s different this time, like he’s sleepy now instead of just exhausted, and that was a huge difference when it came to their Shepard. “To both of you..”
“It’s not easy seeing you run yourself ragged, y’know,” Kaidan replies, reaching down to cup the left side of John’s face in his hand. John closes his eyes as he leans into his palm, and in this moment Kaidan can really see the weight that he was carrying in the furrow of his brow, and the tightness around his bagged eyes. But right now he wasn’t Commander Shepard, first human Spectre, Savior of the Citadel and the galaxy’s greatest hope against the Reapers. No. Here, in this room, he was just John, their best friend, lover, commander, and everything else in between. “It’s good to know we can help.”
“You both do so much more than just ‘help’,” John replies, and there’s an unexpected rawness to his voice that makes both him and Ashley pause as John’s gaze darts back and forth between them. “I mean it, and it probably goes without say but.. I really don’t think I could do this without you two.”
Kaidan swallows, exchanging another glance with Ashley before both of them look back down at John, who almost appears a little bashful after his confession. Kaidan wouldn’t say it out loud, lest it sound like he was mocking what was really a deep moment between them, but the semi-embarrassed look on John’s face was rather cute, and Kaidan knows that he and Ashley both fall a little harder in love with this man.
“You won’t have to, Skipper,” Ashley finally says, giving John another kiss before drawing back so that Kaidan can do the same, cupping his other cheek as she does, and Kaidan feels John smile against his lips as he leans into both her touch and his kiss. “We’re not going anywhere.”
“Stuck with us ‘til the end, Shepard,” Kaidan agrees, giving John’s lips another soft kiss before he wraps an arm around John’s shoulders, and beside him Ashley does the same thing, both of them bringing their boyfriend into a warm hug, and John lets out another content noise as Kaidan slips his other arm around Ashley’s waist, pulling her closer to both of them and letting their embrace become even snugger.
They’d get John over to the bed eventually, convince him that going back to his reports could wait a few hours since they hadn’t come in through any emergency channels, or that they’d just read over them in John’s absence while he tried to get some rest, but for the moment Kaidan is content to just stand there and take a moment to relax with the two loves of his life, soft sighs and gentle kisses still being shared between them.
He didn’t like to think about it, especially when he was enjoying a peaceful moment in their arms, but the reality was that Kaidan didn’t know how many of these moments the three of them had left and he wasn’t intending to waste a single one. He’d had enough regrets and missed opportunities for now.
❥ Running your hand over their arm and gently pulling them close, for your Ryder ship?
Pairing: Scott/CoraRating: T. Warning for multiple minor character deaths.Prompt: “Running your hand over their arm and gently pulling them close.”
( Welp, that rating compared to that prompt.. I mean, I was gonna have to throw them into some angst sooner or later. This one got a bit lengthy, but I hope you enjoy!)
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The mission had felt off from the start, but even Cora, the voice of reason and occasional pessimism ( at least according to Peebee), hadn’t expected it to take the turn it did.
It had started when Scott received an e-mail from an anonymous recipient, asking for some urgent help from the Kadara slums. Vetra and Cora thought it sounded shady, Peebee and Drack thought it sounded fun, but Scott just thought it sounded like people in trouble, and damned if that wasn’t his weakness.
Even so, Scott took Cora and Drack with him down to the slums, thinking there was very little that Kadara could throw at them that couldn’t be beaten by a vanguard and his heavy hitters, while the others stayed behind at the port. Still, Liam suggested that they all kept their comm channels open, just in case.
Cora had been wary from the start but she definitely hadn’t expected their ‘contact’ to actually be a small, cramped house full of elderly humans, most of them looking to be in their late fifties at the earliest. A bit out of place but they all seemed healthy enough and still capable of working, even in spite of their current residence, and Scott voiced this exact train of thought before she could.
Most of them had come to Andromeda to be with their children and their families, they explained, relatives who were all involved one way or another in the uprising at the Nexus and had been exiled along with the rest.
“We could’ve stayed up on the Nexus, done the jobs we came here to do,” one man had said, and something about him told Cora that he was retired military, “But even if our stubborn ass kids didn’t wanna listen to our warnings we’re all that’s left of our families out here. Couldn’t just leave them to struggle down here all alone.”
Scott was able to empathize with them there, earning a little more of the people’s confidence. Cora knew in spite of their difference and obvious issues he would’ve followed his father damn anywhere, and he’d had his sister by his side if he could. Family was a strength to Scott, one that reflected in so many of his decisions, and especially in missions like this.
“They’re trying to settle a village out in the Badlands, traded everything of value we had to finally get enough supplies,” one woman spoke up, “Everyone went out there to work but us, told us they’d come get us once things were stable, but they haven’t checked in all day.”
“My daughter-in-law always checks in, and we’re getting worried,” another woman continued, “There’s over two dozen people out there, including my grandchildren.”
“We’ll go check it out right now, bring them back if we need to,” Scott had promised them, his smile so reassuring because he’d been so sure of how the mission would go. “Probably just an equipment failures, happens a lot out here.”
There really were so many times when Cora had no problems with him being so cocksure, considering how often things actually worked out for them in spite of the struggles on the way.
Looking back now, she should’ve been the voice of realism. She knew she was braced for the worst outcome, Drack probably expected it as soon as he heard the word 'Badlands’, but Scott? His optimism wasn’t just for show but it wasn’t always rewarded either, and though he’d learned that the hard way several times before he always seemed to bounce back from it.
—
They’re nearly at the village’s nav point and something unpleasant has settled in Cora’s chest
Scott seems as calm as ever as he drives down the worn paths serving as Kadara’s 'roads’, and if Drack shares Cora’s concerns he doesn’t voice them, instead just occasionally grunting in acknowledgement as Scott chats to pass the time.
He’s halfway through telling them a story about some 'weirdly charming’ bartender on the Nexus when they see the pillars of black smoke coming up from behind the hill, and the smile falls from Scott’s face. He drives the Nomad a little faster, brow furrowing as worry starts to flash in his eyes, and though she says nothing Cora has a bad feeling about what they’re going to find when they get there.
They reach the village and Scott’s quiet as he parks the Nomad and climbs out, looking around as if he’s not sure what to focus on first: the fires consuming most of the makeshift buildings or the dozen bloody corpses scattered around.
Cora swallows and follows Scott’s lead.
It looked like most of the villagers had been shot down in the middle clearing, and the way some of them fell suggested that they’d been trying to surrender to their mysterious attackers at their time of death. Drack’s the first to point it out, and he grips his shotgun a little tighter.
The fires around them are still roaring, still sending up the thick black pillars of smoke they’d seen on the way in. Scott and Cora exchange looks before they try to investigate but recoil when the breeze sends the stench of burning flesh their way, confirming in the worst way that more people had been inside when their homes went up in flames.
Drack is less bothered by the smell and volunteers to check what little of the buildings he can to try to get a headcount for them, to the obvious relief of his human companions.
They’ve all seen dead civilians before. It was never an easy thing to deal with but at least they had the experience already. That’s what Cora keeps telling herself as she and Scott walk through the village, taking note of how many bodies they can see, and Cora finds a little relief in seeing that most of the shots would’ve killed them instantly. It’s a very small comfort, knowing that they probably didn’t suffer, especially since she can still smell the smoldering bodies of those who’d died to the flames instead.
She keeps an eye out for enemies but also on Scott as well. The reality of the situation doesn’t seem to be grounding him like it does his companions. She’ll grieve and accept what happened to the victims here today, vow to do better next time, and Drack will do the same.
But Scott? Scott’s looking at the dead bodies around him like he’d personally promised these people that he’d protect them to their faces, only to lose them all to this slaughter while his back was turned.
She knows he’s an adult, and a capable fighter who’s gone into battle nearly every day since their arrival in Heleus. He served in the Alliance, must have learned that casualties were just a cruel fact of life, but it doesn’t seem to be helping him now, and she’d be lying if she said she wasn’t a little worried about his current mental state. He always took their losses personally, and she knows he’s thinking about a dozen different 'what-if’ scenarios right now, none of which would change what happened here.
Cora’s broken from her thoughts when she nearly trips over something, and she steps back to see the first non-human body they’d come across lying at her feet.
It was an Angara, weapon still clutched in his still hand, and he was clad in a very familiar set of armor that instantly sets her on edge.
The Roekarr.
Scott scowls when he sees it, walks over the body with none of the respect he usually treats a fallen opponent with, and keeps searching, calling out for any survivors and checking all of the buildings that were still standing.
Cora follows him. With each empty building they check Scott’s expression falls a little more, and she hears him sigh heavily behind her as they finally reach the last building that was still standing. It was small, looked more like a storage shed than anything else, and Cora steps into the unlit room with Scott close behind.
She sees them before he does.
The corpse of a woman, lying in a wide pool of blood, and still clinging to the bodies of two small children, a boy and a girl. Her body was turned, as if she’d been trying to shield the kids in her final moments when the Roekarr came across them.
All three of them, gunned down at once. There was no mercy here, not even for children. They needed to be identified and something else about this mission suddenly feels even more sour. She still didn’t know the exact details behind the events and aftermath of the uprising but there weren’t supposed to be children on Kadara. The Nexus wouldn’t have banished children, even if exiles were the only families they had left. They must’ve been smuggled out by their families, hoping to start their new lives all together, only to meet such a cruel end.
Cora closes her eyes, takes a breath, and looks at the bodies once more. They’re so small, and the entry wounds are so dark against their clothing. Her stomach lurches a little and she doesn’t want to see this anymore, doesn’t want Scott to see them, but he’s by her side before she can keep him from looking.
He takes a sharp breath, his body going rigid beside her, and she’s almost afraid to look at his face and see what sort of expression he’s making.
Then she notices something she wishes she hadn’t. The little girl’s hair is almost the same color as Sara’s.
Scott is already out the building before she even realizes that he’d moved, and he’s calling Drack back over to them as he puts more distance between himself and this massacre.
The Roekarr needed to answer for this. Scott paces angrily as he calls the others down from Kadara, sends Liam and Peebee to search under Jaal’s command while Cora and Drack stayed to search with him. Vetra volunteers to stay behind at the port and see if she can learn anything from her Kadara contacts.
They split up, heading off in different directions, and Cora can’t help exchanging a worried look with Drack when they see the anger burning in Scott’s eyes. It’s not a look that suits him.
“Just let him be angry.” Drack tells her as they head back to the Nomad to start their search for the Roekarr, and the old krogan’s voice was uncharacteristically quiet so Scott couldn’t hear them. “Kid needs get it out of his system now, trust me.”
They tried their hardest.
Over four hours of searching leads to dead end after dead end, even with SAM helping every step of the way. The Roekarr responsible for the slaughter had covered their tracks well, too well for even the scanner to help. Scott curses each time the trail goes cold, and his companions both pretend they don’t see it when he brushes his hands across his eyes.
Before the fifth hour is up Jaal contacts them to let them know that his team had found no solid leads and they were out of trails to follow, and Cora sees a little more light fade from Scott’s eyes. Vetra calls a few minutes later, tells them her contacts had turned up nothing despite how many favors she called in, and Scott suddenly looks exhausted and so defeated that Cora’s feels a physical pang in her chest.
For a long moment after Vetra’s call Scott says nothing but then he sighs, brushes his hands over his face, and tells everyone to return to Kadara port. There would be no justice for the villagers today.
They run into a stray wraith as they return to the Nomad again. Scott kills it it one shot, stares at it, and then completely empties two of his guns into the beast’s body until Drack finally snatches his weapon away.
Cora wishes Scott had argued or tried to get his gun back or just done anything other than give them that hollow stare. Drack frowns, clearly as unsettled as she is, and hands the gun over to Cora instead as Scott walks back to the Nomad.
As they enter the slums again Scott asks them not to say or do anything when they arrive. He’s the Pathfinder, he made the promises, and he’ll deal with breaking the news to the remains of the families. Cora and Drack both vocally disapprove but then promise to respect his wishes, waiting outside instead as Scott heads inside to speak to the elders.
Part of Cora wishes she hadn’t agreed to stay on the sidelines when she hears the sudden shouting from within.
There’s a chorus of horror and disbelief at first, but it doesn’t take that for that to change into anger. At least one of the women is wailing and, to Cora, it sounds like the woman who’d mentioned her grandchild.
She thinks of two small bodies and physically winces.
Scott’s responses are muffled and too quiet to make out but she can hear so many voices yelling at him, telling him he was too slow and cursing him for not saving the village. He promised them. He was supposed to protect people. He’d failed them and their families.
Cora can’t hear Scott’s voice anymore, and she doesn’t know if they’re drowning him out, or if he’s being silent because he agrees with them. Beside her Drack huffs, his scowl deepening at some of the things they’re saying to Scott, and Cora has to physically refrain herself from barging into the room to intervene on Scott’s behalf.
But then the voices fade away before Cora can actually decide whether or not to break the promise to stay out of it, and aside from muffled sobbing the room is silent when Scott finally emerges. His expression is unreadable, eyes blanker than they’ve ever been, and he says nothing to either of them as he walks away, heading towards the lift that would take them back to the main port.
Cora watches him before she glances into the building he’d come out of, sees so many of the elders glowering back at them, eyes shining with ahte and tears, and she hears Drack huff again before the two of them follow after Scott. She’s upset, more than a little angry, and the worst part is that she can’t even begrudge them.
These poor people had just lost everyone.
They meet up with the others and head over to the bar to talk to Reyes before they leave. Cora doesn’t like the man, certainly doesn’t trust him as far as she could throw him even without her biotics, but Scott seems to trust him enough to reveal what went down, and the promise Reyes makes to keep his people searching for the Roekarr behind the massacre seems sincere enough. It doesn’t sit well with Cora, doesn’t seem to sit well with a couple of her squad mates either, but then they see Scott’s expression and no one protests.
The walk back to the Tempest is painfully slow.
Peebee and Liam try to make small talk the entire way, trying to lighten the heavy mood hanging over all of them, but Scott doesn’t acknowledge a word they say, or give any signals that he even hears them talking at all. At first it doesn’t stop them from trying, but it does make their half-hearted laughs sound a little more strained. Peebee gives up before Liam does.
Cora brings up the rear of the group and she sees Drack and Vetra exchanging unreadable looks each time one of them so much as glances at Scott. Jaal eventually strides forward to walk beside their Pathfinder, his words too soft for her to hear, but Scott’s hurried pace doesn’t slow, he doesn’t even look at Jaal, and soon Cora hears the Angara’s soft, defeated sigh.
Gil says nothing as they all file back onto the ship but he does seem surprised by their collective somber mood, shooting Vetra a questioning look after Scott storms past him, and Cora watches as the turian leads their engineer aside to answer his questions, once again out of Scott’s earshot.
Cora, Liam, Jaal, Drack, and Peebee all stop at the lockers to remove their weapons and armor or change into their casual wear but Scott keeps walking, acknowledging nothing they say to him as he rushes out of the cargo bay and leaves his team behind.
In that moment it was all too quiet.
There’s none of those jokes about today’s close calls or assurances about how everything could’ve been way worse. No blue eyes flashing with amusement as the squad compares their personal victories to his. No patted shoulders or fist bumps or crooked smiles as they’re all praised for a job well done by their Pathfinder. There’s just.. nothing in the room that feels like it should when Scott’s around. It’s a terrible feeling.
“So.. What do we do?” Liam’s the one to finally break the silence. “We just give him some space, let him cool down?”
“Can’t cool down cause he’s not pissed off,” Drack grunts in reply, slamming his gun down with a little more force than usual. “Kinda wish he was. That’d make this a hell of a lot easier.”
“Well, you guys know Scott, always needing to be the hero and save everyone he can,” Peebee mumbles from where she’s leaning on the table, and in spite of the overall mood Liam manages a brief smile as he nods in agreement.
“Yeah, but the downside to that is that he carries those he couldn’t save with him,” Vetra sighs, folding her arms over her chest, and beside her Gil is looking somber. “We’ve lost settlers before, but not entire families all at once.”
“He knows we are here, and all willing to listen,” Jaal pipes up, standing in a similar pose as Vetra. “Concealed pain will do nothing but fester and make everything worse. Perhaps he should be speaking about what he’s feeling to the doctor.”
“The doc ain’t the one he needs right now,” Drack replies gruffly, and suddenly six pairs of eyes are turning towards Cora, who stiffens a little under the sudden attention.
She thinks for a moment that they’re right. She was Scott’s partner in addition to his second-in-command, she should’ve been following him already, but there’s still just enough worry in her mind to make her hesitate. There wasn’t anything Scott could have done about what happened, nothing he could have changed, but that didn’t stop him from suddenly blaming himself for the deaths of over two dozen people.
It was a weight she couldn’t imagine carrying, she didn’t want to imagine it, and she didn’t really know what she could do or say to ease any of it.
But then she thinks of him, sitting in his room and all alone with this grief, and her mind is made up for her. Right now he wasn’t just their Pathfinder, he was their friend, her best friend, and he needed them. He needed her.
“We’ll get the reports done and keep Addison off the vid comm,” Vetra promises her with a hint of a smile that Cora manages to return. “You go take care of our boy, Harper.”
Her squad mates are still talking quietly amongst themselves when she leaves the cargo bay, passing Lexi on the way out, and Cora checks the other rooms on the way just to be sure that Scott hadn’t gone anywhere aside from his quarters.
“Lieutenant Harper, I am detecting noticeable chances in Ryder’s stress levels.” SAM’s voice suddenly says over the comms, and she’s always surprised at how concerned their AI could sound at time, especially when it came to Scott. “I have tried speaking with him, however, he is not responding to me. Perhaps you will have better luck.”
“On my way right now, SAM.” Cora reponds promptly, before hearing the soft, familiar chirp of SAM temporarily turning off his logs just as she reaches the Pathfinder Quarters.
The lights are dim and the windows are blacked out when she walks in, definitely not a good sign considering how much Scott loved the view from his room, and speaking of Scott, it actually takes Cora a moment to spot him in the darkness.
He’s sitting on the edge of his bed with his back turned towards the door, leaning forward onto his knees and holding his head in his hands. He looks so small right now, so damn near broken. Nothing like the vibrant, energetic young man she knows and loves, and it hurts seeing him like that.
“Scott?” Cora calls out softly as she approaches him. He tenses up a little when he hears her, but doesn’t look up at her. She walks over to stand beside him, hesitant, before sitting down onto the bed. He doesn’t protest, to her relief, and instead actually leans a little closer to her.
The silence between them is terrible, and so unfamiliar. The two of them being alone in the room usually meant quiet conversations and soft touches. Gentle smiles and shared laughter. Taking comfort in one another’s presence as they finished off their respective reports or just wasting their free time lounging in bed together. Even their occasional bickering would’ve been preferable to this..
“Scott,” Cora tries again, concern heavy in her voice as she reaches over to trace her hand along his arm. Scott tenses up again but this time he sighs, and finally raises his head to look over at her.
Cora’s heart sinks when their gazes meet. His eyes are brimming with a terrible mix of emotions, a bit red and just puffy enough to betray the fact that he hadn’t just been sitting there in the time it took her to reach him. She’s hit with a pang of guilt but she’s more concerned than anything else right now, and she traces fingers down his arm to gently touch his hand.
Scott swallows, and turns his hand over to grasp hers. His fingers are trembling.
“Scott, please, say something..”
“Cora..” Scott starts but he barely gets her name before his voice breaks and his expression suddenly crumbles.
He turns his body towards her and Cora immediately pulls him into an embrace, her arms around his torso and his fingers are gripping the back of her shirt. His hands are shaking, his shoulders are threatening to do the same, and Cora gently rubs his back as he buries his face into the crook of her neck.
It hurts, seeing him like this. It’s one of the few occasions where she’s reminded that Scott really is a young man, just a boy to most, and a wide-eyed idealist carrying far too much weight on his shoulders. She does admire how rarely he actually buckles under it, but still hates when she sees it actually happening.
Scott lets out a shaky breath as he presses himself a little closer to her, his shoulders shaking a bit more as Cora reaches up to brush a hand through his hair, trying to soothe him with soft whispers and even softer kisses.
She wants to think it’s helping him, even as she starts to feel the dampness against the neckline of her shirt. Scott’s not okay right now, might not be okay for a while even once he’s laughing and smiling again, but at least she knew she could be there with him. She couldn’t take the pain away but she could ease him through it, and sometimes that was all a person could do.
Just finished up your single bed fic! Excellently written, you did great at Zev's perspective! Super glad you delved into his one (1) whole feeling, it was a blast to read!
14. What are some of the skills or things the character teaches to their children? Some family traditions, or particularly important life lessons? How about their partner?o Answered here!
15. Is there a toy/book/game the character is almost as excited about as the child (or even MORE so than the child? :D)o Shaun and Blaise share a love of the old Silver Shroud show, though Blaise loves it much more while Shaun's interests are more focused on MacCready's collection of Grognak comics. Also, Duncan, once he comes to Sanctuary Hills, has a Jangles the Moon Monkey doll that he carries around with him, though Blaise won't tell anyone that he really hates it.
"Shitposting is srs business and shouldn’t be messed with" oh my god i don't even know where to start when did shitposting get a Golden Standard Classic™ rating from the Academy?
idk man will anything ever top ‘I have never been so glad to have “The World of Thedas: Volume 2” at my disposal than after seeing this here.’
