My story is a story of providence.
I often though of it as lame or boring and was quite honestly resentful. But I’ve learned that there is beauty in it.
I have loved Jesus for as long as I can remember. Beyond that even. I grew up the “good girl.” I went to church, Sunday school, and youth group. I volunteered, had good manners, and tried my best to be kind to everyone. For all intents and purposes, I was a good Christian.
But I wasn’t an on fire Christian. I was stagnant. I didn’t do what God was asking of me. (Grace through faith alone, yes, but with that there should be a desire to give everything back. We cannot come close to matching the sacrifice that Jesus paid, but we should long to try.)
I’m not there yet, but I’m jumping ahead of myself.
I was in a state of doing what was asked of me and what I thought was expected. I knew the right answers -I was the good girl. But I didn’t put in any effort beyond that. I never sacrificed or have until it hurt. I didn’t spend time on my own building a relationship with God. I was relying on the community I was with to do it for me.
There was never an exact moment that I could point back to, but slowly, surely I’ve been changing that mentality. I’ve been spending time with my Lord. I’ve been building a relationship with my Abba, father, and learning to turn to him first. And let me tell you -it is the most rewarding thing that I’ve done in my short life.
I say my story is one of providence because God’s hand has been evident. He has keep me from a lot of harm and given me a solid foundation upon which to build my faith. I may have taken him for granted, but he’s always been there.
I’m not there yet, I’m not sure I’ll ever be. But I’m falling deeper in love with my savior and it’s kinda a snowball effect. The more I grow the more I want to. So I’ll rest in the joy and peace that come from him alone and keep seeking my savior.
Off in pursuit of Christ, Olivia