#folklore anon

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon(ish) Advice Asks - May 9

@ameliatheperson , @teasiswriter , hair anon, 100% anon, personal anon, folklore anon, therapist anon

@ameliatheperson

hi cas! this a bit of a vent/advice maybe? im not using anin bc I've talked about this on this acc anyway, but I just don't know what to do about this.

so I have severe scoliosis, right bordering the surgical threshold. it gets x rayed about every 6-9 months, since it's pretty likely to get worse as I become an adult. this should be fine, it's my reality. the only thing is that my back has been hurting a lot more than normal this past week, in the way that it did when my curve worsened after I stopped wearing my brace. I'm really anxious about it, because if I need surgery, it will ruin my entire senior year of highschool, and there's nothing I can do to prevent it from worsening and I can't even know whether it has gotten worse until August.

I know I shouldn't worry about things out of my control, but I just need to talk to someone about it. the thing is I hate talking to my siblings or parents because they get very uncomfortable whenever I talk about it (understandably) and I don't want to burden my friends and make them uncomfortable. there is one person who has gone through the same thing or almost, but tbh I don't know where I stand with her, it's complicated. we have a school counselor, but I'm scared to talk to her for a couple reasons. I'm just hoping you have any other ideas for what to do? I've tried to help by journaling, but that never really helps me. I'm sorry, this got so long!!!

Hi!

Wow, that sounds so scary, and I completely understand why you're anxious about it. I feel like you have the right ideas for what do do about it- talking, journaling, etc. Is there any way you can go to the doctor sooner to get peace of mind?

Either way, you're welcome to vent to me all you want! I can't pretend to understand but I'm always willing to listen, and venting about things can be really helpful. Remember to continue to wear your brace and do whatever else your doctor has said to do!

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@teasiswriter

Hihihi so I have a ton of rings that I wear daily (9 in total, 6 on one hand and 3 on the other) and I kinda have a problem with “main character syndrome” I guess? In the sense that sometimes I do things hoping someone will compliment me or notice me, so I can have self esteem, but I’ve been shifting away from that and have been doing things for myself recently and I realized how good that people noticing me for actually being myself (and also, actually being myself) can feel!

In drama class someone commented on all the rings and so I just had like, a group of 5 people ask me about all of my rings and the stories behind them and I got to tell them. One of them said “yeah with your hand gestures and movements you were doing when you were talking I kept noticing them and was wondering about them all”

Like, oh my gosh???? People noticed my hand gestures???? I’m known for having hand gestures???? I barely noticed that about myself???? You like my rings????? Thank you they’re the way I express things I don’t know how to write???? They’re the trinkets I keep with me that make me feel safe???? Thank you for noticing my existence???????? I love you?????????

Anyways, it rocked and today was an okay day! Soooo yeah :D

hahaha this made me giggle because it's relatable. I think it's nice to be noticed for something you do to be yourself, you know? Like instead of doing something purposely to be noticed, you do something for yourself, and then STILL get noticed. It feels a hundred time better.

I'm glad you had a good day!

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usaid anon

Hey its usaid anon,

So... fuck. Not to anything in paticular just what the fuck.

But the point of this ask is theres been word of a 15% cut in EVERY department WITHIN the state department. And the med department (the department my mom works for) isnt that big. Not to mention the are only 10 people with the job she has, meaning her name is up there. As she said theyre "an easy part of the 15"

Ive been trying to look on the bright side of everything so rn the small comforts are that i will 100% be staying until the end of the school year (3 weeks but as i said, small comforts) and there are pros of going back to the u.s. so far i have:

I could actually go to protests

Chipotle

Family

If it happens to my friend in china too we could see each other more often

I think thats it.

SIDE NOTE: FUCKING JD VANCE CAME HERE TO INDIA. Its so stupid. He went for his kids spring break but he didnt want to pay for it so he sceduled some meetings on the monday and then got his vacation for free bc it was technically a """""business trip"""""". Kind of funny thing about the visit tho. They obviously need staff from the embassy and they were struggling to find people willing to join bc it was vance. Which is rlly funny to me.

Im really trying to find a balance between being informed and knowing whats going on and not focusing on this ALL the time.

Hi <3

I'm so sorry, that's terrifying. I wish I could do something to help. I do have to say though, chipotle being on your list of positives is such a vibe. And you're not wrong at all.

I'm sending you so much love, and please keep me updated. I hope things turn out well for you and your family <3

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hair anon

Hey, how’ve you been? Sorry for the incoming vent

I’m having a very bad gender day. It’s spirit week and I was asked to dress either emo or preppy but it made me super dysphoric and I wore my normal stuff. And I might be late for school because of all the different things I was changing in and out of to make myself feel better. I don’t even know what gender I want to look like. I don’t even know what name I want to be called. It makes me sad and angry for no reason. I don’t want to hate my body, I worked so hard to like it again. And my binder doesn’t help much. I hate my boobs and I hate my legs and I hate spirit week and I want to scream and cry and yell.

—Hair anon

Hey Cas, I’m sorry for another ask so soon

I’m just, having a very bad gender day again. My hair, my chest, my legs, everything. I can’t wear a binder because it causes me so much chest pain, and my parents won’t be thrilled if I ask for another one, so now I’m stuck, in the summer, with some big annoying boobs that won’t go away! They’re like, the forefront of ALL my normal sized shirts and make me sweat so much. If my bra is too loose it flops and if my bra ACTUALLY FITS ME it’s all big and in your face. I hate it. Like, I don’t even know how to style myself with my boobs. And summers in like, 2 months which is usually when I experiment with my style and stuff so I’m stuck looking like a massive weird freak.

Sorry. I shouldn’t say that. I learned that my thoughts about myself can actually become things I believe if I say them enough. I just feel so gross and insecure. I feel disproportionate.

I just can’t wait until summer, where I won’t be around my classmates 24/7, so I won’t get so many questions if I braid my hair to grow it out, or if I start dressing differently, etc.

My hair is just stressing me out. Everything is so stressful especially when my mind is insistent on fighting itself!! :(

Anyways, I’m sorry for the downer of an ask. Thanks for being a listening ear

—Hair anon

Hi hon!

Please don't be sorry! I totally understand having a Bad Gender Day, and it sucks SO much. The icky feeling of changing a million times, feeling all itchy in your skin, nothing feeling right...it's awful and I wouldn't wish it on anyone. You're always welcome to vent to me about that, and anything else. I wish there was something I could do </3 I'm proud of you for recognizing that your current binder isn't good for your chest. Have you tried TransTape? Sometimes it works better for people, depending on the shape of their body, or their other needs. If you do try it, make sure to follow the directions on ways to tape, and use oil to remove it. But yeah, a lot of people prefer it to binders!

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100% anon

hii its 100% anon!

thank you sm for answering my ask<3

your like explanaition is so good bc ive been trying to undrstabd what it meens but now its clear!

and yeah ig i am kind of sure? or more or less sure that i dont like guys in a romantic way!

anyways thank you so much!

hope youre doing okayy<3

Yay, I'm so glad I could help! No problem at all!

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folklore anon

folklore anon!

it took me a while to answer back but yeah..

i think youre right i shouldnt feel guilty abt how i feel but i still do and it sucks

but atleast,yes i had a great time there<3

my uncle gave me a kindle!

i hope youre having a great night/day

Yeah, it's definitely easier said than done- to not feel guilty. But I'm glad you had a great time! And a kindle is so exciting!

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personal anon

heyy, its personal anon!

so my parents took us out last thursday for dinner, everything was good until they brought up grades abd school and how its "not my style" and how "i used to be so great" and how my grades are slowly dropping as if i dont already know that and hate myself for it!and guess what? they made me cry yay! so i went to the bathroom and cried for 5mins and didnt talk to them for the rest of the night<3 and the bext morning my mom was acting like nthg happened so yeah

Ugh that sounds AWFUL. And in public, too...I'd be so upset. I'm so sorry that happened. If you want to vent, I'm here <3

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Therapist anon

Hi!

First of all, your sister sounds like a pain. Like yes, she's acting her age, but she's being annoying, and that's okay to say.

Honestly, Instead of just going to your parents and complaining, I would approach it like "___ is happening. What do you think I should do?" For example, "Sister keeps kicking me out even when I'm sick. What should I do?" And then see what they say. Don't say it sarcastically, say it like "You guys are smart, responsible adults. What do I do?" (even if you don't feel that way). Like.. make your problems their problems. Make THEM figure out a solution.

And if they won't? Idk, it's probably shit advice because it's not the nicest, but I'd probably find a way to make it their problem in another way. Like when you get kicked out, go sit with your parents and talk their ears off. When your sister won't hand you a pad, call your parents and ask them to hand you one. Make it their problem, because like...you're doing your best to cohabitate, so she needs to as well.

I hope things get better and your shoes are still perfect!

[highgaarden]

Thoughts on tswifts new album? It took me awhile to get into but now exile and my tears ricochet are on constant repeat and has me wanting to revisit old klaroline fics 😂

OKAY SO I DO HAVE THOUGHTS. as usual tay's new album oscillates between her "" "new" "" sound and then to a brighter pop that can be slightly jarring for me. a few songs stand out to me but I'm not sure if it's because of The National Stan in me but you can just TELL which songs he had a hand in producing. Overall it's a pretty good album to me - some won't get a second listen (like exile. I tried. But I couldn't stomach it a quarter way the second time because I just find it boring) but some I will REPLAY TO DEATH (seven, mirrorball, epiphany). And some songs get better with every listen, like cardigan and my tears ricochet. Like I get a cranberries vibe to some of her new songs (mirrorball!!!) and I really enjoy the maturity inherent in her lyrics, now it's something I actively listen to for the stories because before it used to be more... one-liner-y.

BUT YES TO IT INSPIRING FANDOM FEELS! I actually started making a kc gifset in my head lmao

Also you can probs find my thoughts on my favourite song from the album, "seven", somewhere in my blogmess

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon Advice Asks - April 22

grounded anon, folklore anon, Spoty anon (new), crushed anon (new), 100% anon

Grounded anon

Hi! I'm glad things have calmed down a bit at home!

Ugh, yeah. Unfortunately it's a canon event as a queer person to have a crush on a straight friend. And it SUCKS.

Remember that you're allowed to set boundaries, though. Like if it's too hurtful to be physically affectionate and say 'I love you' in a platonic way, you don't HAVE to do that. You can say that you prefer less affection, and that's okay! Put your mental health first! <3

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folklore anon

hii its folklore anon, its been so long since i came here but i think something's wrong with me

so idk if you remember but told you that i have this uncle who i love and this uncle is living in europe(croatia) ad as my godfather he invited me (well my grandma, my aunt and her fam-) to visit him and basicly today is our 4th day. my mom is always checking up on me and every time she says that she misses me i just say "me too" but i really dont feel it, and also before i left she was like "yeah when youll leave its gonna be nice to get rid of us" or smthg like that but in a like funny way but in my mind i was like"ye youre right" but i just smiled and its so idk weird and i feel a little guilty that im not missing my fam

anyways hope youre doing okay<3

Hi!

I mean if you don't miss your family, there's probably a reason for that, and it's not something to do with you. So I don't think you should feel guilty for that at all. But I also don't think you should feel guilty for lying because like...what good would it do to be truthful? Probably not a lot.

Are you having fun in Croatia though?

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Spoty anon (tw- pet death)

I really need someone to talk to So I hope this is ok.

My childhood dog that we rescued when i was ca. 7, ( his name is Spoty) will probably die soon. Maybe even this night.

He doesn't eat, doesn't stand up and it's just showing. I feel really like I don't know what to do whitout him.

Sure he often was very loud but the house is now so empty even with our other dogs that I also love over everything. Last year my other dog (Aaron) that lived by my father also died and my other dog (Oscar)(also by my dad) will probably also go soon. I don't know how to feel, I know that he will be going without pain so atleast that but I am still so sad.

Since I was 8 I always had 4 dogs (since last year five(Khalil)) I grew up with these dogs, they were/are my friends when I had nobody.

I am just really sad and needed to let it our so thank you

Hi <3

I think people who don't have pets don't understand how devastating the death of a pet can be. Your grief is so valid, and I understand how lost you feel after losing an animal

Please remember to be gentle with yourself. You're allowed to grieve. And if you want to talk about any of your pets to me, please feel free to inbox me!

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crushed anon (new)

So recently I’ve been feeling bad, me and someone who has been my friend got in a fight and that “friend” got in contact with my mother and got her on her side. It crushed me that my own mother one of the most important people in my life would take the side of someone who I had repeatedly told her was mean if not evil to me. On top of that I’m set to move away from my friends to a new place in May. I really, really don’t want to go but it’s our only choice.

Hi <3

First, I'm sorry that your ex-friend did that. That's fucked up, and it but feel so overwhelming that your mom has taken her side too. And on top of that, moving? I can't imagine how scary that is.

As far as what to do from here-- first, remember that people care. Whether or not they act like it, they do. I do.

Second, try to write down things you're looking forward to. Even little things. Breakfast tomorrow, a movie coming out soon, taking a nap after school. ANYTHING. And then just tell yourself that you're going to get to that thing. Like if you're feeling overhwlemed, tell yourself you're looking forward to watching a movie tonight, and you only have to focus on getting to that movie. Nothing else. Once you get there, then give yourself a new little thing to get to. Small increments. Don't focus on the big picture.

And if you need it, my pinned post has a link for hotlines <3

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100% anon

hii its 100% anon

first off ilove my anon name lol, second thanks for answering my ask even though it was nothing<3

anyway i habe been questioning my sexuality for a while and im still nkt so sure

like i know that i like- no love women and i have no problem with being witha non-binary lerson but a man? nkt so sure bc i dnt immagin myself with one but sometime like im walking down the street and i see i guy and be like "damn hes beautiful" or something like that but still i sometimes feel ljke i need affirmation from the male gender if that makes sence?

ughhh its just so weird!

hope youre having an amazing day/night!!

Hi!

I mean, you can have different levels of attraction to different genders. That's perfectly valid, and a lot of people are like that!

As far as needing validation from men- from your last ask, I'm going to guess you're afab? Yeah, that's probably a societal thing. Afab people are taught from birth that we need validation from men, so that's a hard thing to unlearn. That can be different from being attracted to men, though.

[my-castles-crumbling]

Anon Advice Asks - February 10th

Social cues anon, canon anon (new), midnights anon, spoon anon, folklore anon

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Social Cues Anon

Hey, it's social cues anon again, I am sorry I am being annoying.

Now I know it might sound dumb or like I don't expect you to know my feelings or the fact I don't know them is stupid but.

I like him??? Is it romantic?

Really? Do I? I didn't realize I talked about him like that till you pointed out Sara might do that bc of this. And I know it's stupid and I know I should know my emotions or something like that but I really don't know.

And um, can you help? Like, how did you know I liked him? Did I say something that's romantic? Can you write the part that makes you think I like him and why? I am sorry you don't have to. I am not sure and I am sorry I am an idiot when it comes to this stuff and I really genuinely don't know what's considered a romantic attraction. I am not a child so it's honestly embarrassing.

This is embarrassing sorry I am just confused.

(but also happy bc that means Sara isn't mad!! I like our friendship with her I would be sad otherwise.)

(I texted him the art exhibit thing now you said I should, he didn't answer yet I am so nervous what if it annoys him. Would you be annoyed if someone you recently (not so recent but still) became friends asked to go to an art exhibit right? Anyway I can update when he text back. Well I won't if you don't want me to. Anyway I am writing to you too much I understand if not-)

(And like, would you be annoyed if someone waved at you or said hello when you see each other on campus? Do you think if I say 'hey' sometimes he would be mad? He is so nice and I know he won't be openly mad about it but what if he finds me annoying I don't want him to think about me in a bad way- sev is like, won't hate anyone I am sure that's how he is but what if he dislikes me it's a possibility right. I am yapping too much sorry)

Anyway you don't have to do it really.

And it might be ironic but sorry for apologizing too much too, I tried to delete a few but I feel like I have to and I don't want to be rude and all

Don't hate me please

HAHAHA wait I thought you said you liked him? You talked about him being nice and kind and attractive, and I just....okay whoops. I mean maybe you don't like him in a romantic way, I just...you sounded like you did lol. Like you said a few times that he's cute and nice and I guess I just assumed?

Okay I am not annoyed. Nor would I be annoyed if my friend asked me to go to a museum. Or if someone waved at me. I think that's nice!

I don't think he finds you annoying <3 You have no reason to apologize and it sounds like you're just overthinking (which is okay!) I think you just need to wait and see what he says and know that either way, you've done nothing wrong. I promise <3 Also I don't hate you.

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Canon Anon

Hey cas

99.9% of the time when content talking about Canon vs fanon marauders shows up I don't say anything. I mean the whole point of fan fic is that it isn't canon, right? Most things I'm just like yk, whatever individuals prefer.

But people who get upset about certain aspects of regs charecter bug me. Like okay- canon say reg got the dark mark at 16, died at 19, betrayed voldy last minute and tried to destroy the horcrux. And people are like well there's not proof he was abused, plus his parents weren't voldy supporters, so he chose to be a death eater, and just because he changed agendas, doesn't mean he actually rejected beliefs like blood purity, so he was still bad.

And like... maybe people in this fandom just haven't known a lot of far right teenagers? Or teens in general?

But like there was a war happening *the entire time* reg was in school. And his parents might not have directly supported voldy but you can tell from the descriptions of the house that it was an oppressive and blood purist family. And then he was sorted into a house at school with a bunch of other blood purists who were as a group ostracized by other children. And yeah that was those kids way of defending themselves but it's really hard to break away from beliefs that are so reinforced on every side, especially when no one is helping. Idk. It just seems out of tune with our current reality yk

Just thoughts

I think....I think it's hard because we know next to nothing about canon reg. So people can feel however they want about him. And yes, he can be an excellent mirror into real-life kids today and what they're dealing with, but we also have to remember that part of fandom is not censoring people. So if people believe different things about Regulus, that's their right, and it doesn't have to have to do with real-life current events. As long as nobody is being rude about it, it's okay for people to believe different things. So while I don't disagree with you, it's okay for people to have other beliefs, too.

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Midnights Anon

HI my dear <3

I definitely think it's time to tell someone and ask for help. Honestly, it sounds like you're struggling so much, and you don't deserve that. You're right, it can be super hard to tell someone, and it can be hard to figure out hat to say. My suggestion is to write it out, just like you do with me. Then, just hand the paper to someone, like a guidance counselor or a parent (sounds like your counselor may be a good idea?) Whoever you think will be the most helpful and understanding. That way you don't have to find the words on the spot. Write to them about the thoughts you've been having and the way you've been coping. And yes, definitely ask for a therapist.

And I'll be honest, getting help can be scary. it can feel overwhelming at some points. But you're are SO right when you said in a few years, you will look back and be SO glad you did it. I can say that firsthand, because I had to do the same thing. I believe in you and I know you can do this <3

Also, I do not think you're a bad person. I promise <3

Keep me updated!

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Spoon anon

hi cas it's spoon anon

i'm honestly kind of scared because what if i'm just overthinking everything and it's all just in my head and who even trusts internet quizzes and then it'll just be like i cried wolf when there was nothing but if something is actually there it'll be on record and i don't want that maybe i just get sensorily overwhelmed easily and have depressive episodes and anxiety attacks like normal people and there's actually nothing to be diagnosed but idk sometimes i feel like there might be and other times i'm just perfectly fine like i could be having three anxiety attacks and a mental breakdown one day and then be completely fine and happy the next so maybe it's all in my head then i won't ever be able to trust myself when it comes to mental health i mean i probably already have a skewed up version of it from my culture but i have this need to know if there's actually something and idk I'm just scared

Hi <3

I completely understand why you're nervous. But honestly, from talking to you a few times, it seems like it's going to bug you until you know. Also, if you do get diagnosed with something, you don't have to share that with anyone, you know? It can just be something you know and you choose what to do with it from there.

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Folklore anon

hello,folklore anon here!

so there's no real reason km writing this but ijdut felt really lonely and sad i rly dk why... is thet normal? because smtimes i really fell like this and want to cry/scream and this feeling is really bothernig me...

oh! and tday i went w my mom to buy a hoodie and i told her that i wnted it from the men's section and it was weird and not weord at the same time so yeah..just a random thing iwnted to say✋️

Yeah I definitely feel like that sometimes. Do you have a friend you could reach out to and just talk to on the phone or text with for a bit? You don't even have to tell them you're feeling down, you could just be with them. Either way, I'm proud of you for reaching out! And I'm proud of you for asking for the clothing you wanted!

[my-castles-crumbling]

helloo,so i jsyt came to rant✋️

so i was riding my bicycle midinf my oen business and then a full grown man whs getting iv hid car whirl i ws passing by so he decided whrn i gor this close to his door to open it and i fall ovet ,tgen he says smthf like"sre youb lind?? or crazy?" and tehn i was liek "no are YOU blind I was paasing by and you saw me hoe van you open the door liek that?!" and tehn i went home✌️

long storu shor ti almkst gt ran ove rtodya🥰

~folklor anon

smh some people are so mean. Are you okay? You seem a bit shaken up. If you got hurt, make sure to get checked out! Sometimes injuries from stuff like that can get worse later on.

[my-castles-crumbling]

hii,this is folklor anon!

first of all happy new yearr a little late but ye

so i have LOTS a things to ask !

first i wanted to say tjanks so so much for answering me😭🫶 and so sorry for all teh typos i didnt realise thay i make si many mistakes✋️so i have. a question how do you come up with the anon names??im just really curious

secondd, i just realised that i am actually attracted to girls.how did i discover this? well i was remembering last years christmas camo we went to in scout and yehrw was this girl who was just new and we started talking and shes really nice and all, then later on i thought like yeah i really like her and hope she likes me to and then i remember thinking liek man i hope shes for the girls😭I ACTUALLY WAS THINKDIN IT AND I CANT THIS IS SO WEIRD. but now we're friend and all and i DONT think about her lirk taht anymore but yee... so what do you think bc im really dying here. oh and im also considering talking about it with my uncle.

sorry for bothering you during the holidays

hope you have a great year<3

Hi!

Please don't apologize, it's no problem <3

To pick anon names, at this point I'm just going with random words because I'm out of meaningful words lol.

And as far as liking girls, I mean you can like more than one gender too! If your uncle is a safe person to talk to, you should definitely talk to him about it! It might be helpful to lay those emotions out and try to organize them a bit.

[my-castles-crumbling]

hello,first i wanted to say tgat youre really an amazing person i love your work!

i was not rwlly sure if i shoukd ask or not but i was liek why not.so uh i dont know how to sya this but let me satr by saying that im a chriatian teenage girl who is questionning her sexuality.yk its just really confusing because first it started like reading fics then i started asking myself like what if im not straight?and its just really scarry because once i was like yeah this girl is realy pretty and i wouldnt mind yk beig with her and im also attracted to guys thats 100%sure but yeah.and im really scared to ask someone,im pretty sure my mom is homophobic like not homophobic but she doesnt like queer ppl and my dad i rlly dont know he has a queer brother who came out when i was really young actually and i really love him anyway im going off track the thing is im really confused because maybe im not rwally queer?yk

anyway hope you have a good day<3ofc you really dont have to answer!!

Hi!

That definitely sounds like a scary thing to question when you don't know if you have an accepting support system. I know it's hard not to know, but unfortunately I can't tell you for sure. I think there's a few things to remember though:

It's okay not to know. It's okay to just explore your feelings as they come (as long as you're being healthy and age-appropriate)

It's also okay to acknowledge your feelings. 'Queer' feelings aren't bad.

Using fanfiction and other things to sort through your feelings isn't bad, either. It's okay and natural to want to use that stuff to figure that out, and to explore those things whether you're queer or not.

without knowing more I think the best suggestion I can give you is to find someone you can trust to talk about it in more detail. Do you feel comfortable talking to your uncle? If you do, I think he would be an amazing resource, tbh. Having an adult who you know is a safe person is so important.

I'm sending you so much love, naming you folklore anon!

[writer-in-theory]

hi!! folklore mini series anon here!! i am by no means a writer so i would honestly be honored if you wanted to write it!! i adore your work and i think you could really make it come to life <3

ahh hello anon!! sorry for the delay, i kept trying but for some reason i can't answer asks on my phone so i had to wait until my laptop was available.

BUT YOU'VE MADE MY DAY OMG. i am so excited to write this, you have no idea. seriously. and thank you so so much for your kind words 💜