#forrestfawn

[youmydeer]

majestic in the sun

[youmydeer]

my love

[youmydeer]

tea

[youmydeer]

I feel as though I am running in circles trying to find the one thing that I desire and am desperate to find- yet I don’t know what that is. In this point in my life, as young as I am, I feel the pressure of knowing what to do, not as a job or future life events but now, as myself and how to live. I am very lost and I can’t seem to find me

Just a thought.

[youmydeer]

Slowly

I have always looked for external love in order to love myself, it is difficult to admit the truth of the saying ‘you can’t love someone until you love yourself’. It is so hard to love myself when all I have ever known is to act in a way that pleases others.

I have always looked for external love - the kind of love that I desire and only receive when I have acted correctly or when I have acted out of kindness which is not always reciprocated,

as a child, I could never play on my own but now, I fear that isolation is the only way I can figure out the complexities of myself, because there is no choice but to think about them.

I have always looked for external love, on the contrary, I’m finding it easier, day by day to imagine the independence and the internal love that I will possess for my own benefit, not anyone else’s. Slowly