#fpa shitposts

[lichfucker]

I know I'm a vocal "flint dies" truther but watching curt pull the trigger and reading fetch pull the trigger REALLY makes it feel like silver could not under any circumstances ever pull the trigger. ever.

[lichfucker]

was literally abt to make a post saying "hendricks should have tried to beat fetch to death with his cane" before I remembered that He Did 🥰🤩🥰🤩🥰

[lichfucker]

listen. there is a scale. I don't know what it measures, but silverflint is on one end; curtwen is on the other; and fetchricks is right in the middle. I became obsessed with owen. then I became obsessed with flint. then I became obsessed with hendricks. if anyone is surprised, then I have misrepresented my brand. the saf people are gonna learn about fetchricks and the fpa people are gonna learn about curtwen and the bs people are gonna learn about all of it and this is my divine mission. on g-d y'all will join me in this pit

[lichfucker]

I need everyone who hasn't read fpa to know how literal I'm being every time I tag posts about People Being Dogs as fetch. his name is fetch. he is CONSTANTLY referred to by other characters as someone's pet. his entire life can be split into eras defined by which person he has pledged undying loyalty to. when his owner is gone he basically lives on the streets, losing any ability to take care of himself beyond the bare minimum of scraping for survival. he gets called "good boy" so many times. HIS NAME IS FETCH. HE GOT THAT NAME BY BEING HELPFUL AND DOING ODD JOBS. LIKE A DOG.

[lichfucker]

that bit in aso when siobhan jokes that norm is "the last straight man in space" except it's fetch calling himself the last straight man in sunder. and he isn't straight.

[lichfucker]

everyone: hey uh actually maybe khay killing people is bad

fetch: g-d forbid women do anything 🙄

[lichfucker]

going insane about hendricks' ears again lads

[lichfucker]

fetch: practicing archery

theo: "ah, you're a good boy"

fetch, nervously sweating: haha what.