Pre-op appointment for vaginectomy (long post)
I finally got my appointment after having it rescheduled twice. The appointment was with Preben Kjölhede, associate professor at the Department of Obstetrics and Gynecology, at Linköping University Hospital. Basically, this guy is good.
I was incredibly nervous before the appointment and I forgot my anxiety meds at home so that didn’t really help… I was scared about going to the gynecology office and being the only guy there, but there were lots of other guys there (dads to be etc) so it made me feel a bit better. I was still really nervous after being called in. Preben was really nice though and didn’t beat around the bush but just got straight to talking about the procedure, I really appreciated that.
He will make an excision, meaning that there’s a risk of bleeding or perforating the intestines during the procedure. He told me that he happened to perforate the intestines during one operation, but that he repaired the damage at once and the patient in question had no issues afterwards. He also had one patient who had a long bout of post op pain, that lasted about three months and then went away. Those are the patients with any major complications related to this procedure that he has operated on. According to him, there is too little evidence about long term effects of vaginectomy for transsexual men, mostly in terms of effect on the pelvic floor. The vagina acts as supporting tissue for the bladder and intestines, meaning there’s technically a risk of incontinence and prolapse. In my research about vaginectomy performed on trans men I haven’t yet found anyone who has testified about any of these complications.
He made it clear that this is a surgery that is “voluntary” to have and that he wants me to be completely aware on the risks about it. I on my hand made it clear to him I do not really consider this voluntary procedure, but a necessary one. Still having a vagina is inflicting a lot of issues on my every day life, even with things like going to the bathroom. I have given this A LOT of thought and research and I have tried to make peace with what I have, but it doesn’t work. I consider the risks of this surgery worth taking. I am happy with my metoidioplasty results, but still having a vagina makes it so I can’t be fully at peace with my genitalia. Preben accepted this as a fully valid reason to want this surgery.
He asked if I would be OK with him examining me. I was not completely sure, so he told me he didn’t want to make me feel bad or dysphoric and that he could do it on the day of the surgery. The reason he wanted to do an exam was to see how deep the vagina is. In very rare cases, the vagina is too deep to perform a vaginectomy. I didn’t want to be put under and have to wake up to bad news, so I had the exam. He was very respectful throughout the whole thing and again pointed out that he could totally do it on the day of the surgery. I told him I’d rather do it now, seeing as it is probably the last time I ever have to do anything like that. After that, he told me he’ll have me set up with the surgery coordinator who will find me a date for it. I will stay at the same ward I did after my metoidioplasty, which was tremendous news! I was worried I’d have to be in the gynecology ward but he said they always put their patients discretion first, rather than the comfort of the surgeons. Let me tell you, this is very rare in Sweden.
I have probably forgotten a bunch of things, my head is all mushy. Please ask all the stuff you want! I am a bit too wrapped up in all the good thoughts about this too think straight.
I can’t believe I am so close to considering myself fully transitioned! Holy crap, people. WOW.
