Hello, Have an In-ordinate amount of Fucks
Fuck you, Fuck this, Fuck me - not literally and no offence/fucks given to you.
This is a lil rant of tiredness.
I feel like I’m behind on my studies, I can barely keep myself awake, I keep saying I’m going to start working out but that never seems to be happening-
I feel like I’m gaining weight- acc scrap that- I KNOw I’m gaining weight, and I cant seem to lose the weight I gained from my binge-eating disorder, which happened right after my anorexic eating disorder.
I cant Bloody Focus- nothing’s working, my brain doesnt want to work, I cant force myself to work.
Mainly at myself- a little at the world, because hey big guy up there, I kinda need some good news soon, or else I am going to Bloody LOSE it- big time.
and i dont want to go through it
I’m having panic attacks again- and they’re happening during the day this time- do you know how hard it is to lay still and pretend nothings wrong whilst you can’t breathe, your chest is hurting, and you heart is pounding so hard you swear the people around you can hear it.
I want peace and calm and quiet- Not this raging turmoil thats brewing underneath my skin and spilling out- warning me of a flood in the near future.
Because who else do I have to blame for this but myself.