#furry therapy

[niwawings15]

🌸 😔 Give Kaye something that calms her

Furry therapy!

[penmarkart]

I really want to share this with you… If you are able to click the image and zoom in, please do. I blurred out the user’s icon and name out of respect. Essentially, after I defended Furries by saying “…as long as they act kindly and respectfully to others, weirdness happens.” Then, this new user replies:  “The problem is that neither kindness nor respect are present in the Hobbesian natural state that the fandom finds itself in, and will perpetually remain in. Well, right up until the point that they form camps and attack groups who disagree with them, rather than individuals. “ At first, I was honestly filled with frustration and rage. Sure, I realize that the user might likely be a Troll, but I really wanted to give an example on how to respond to negativity like this, especially to defensive Furries… So I gave it my best to show them the kindness and respect I was talking about: “The negative generalizations like ‘there is no kindness or respect’ is EXACTLY what continues the problems you are addressing. If we choose to always act on Fear or Hostility, we will indeed find ourselves in a feedback loop of constant conflict. The Hobbesian tendency of expecting the worst is a habit we need to fix, not surrender to. I agree that the fandom has a lot of mistrust, but it makes more sense to Face the problem with an attitude of SOLVING it, rather than giving up on the change we want. I have found so many Furries who are kind, respectful, and actively helping each other. There is A LOT of kindness present, and it needs to be spread. Helping each other learn from mistakes is what a growing community is all about. I’m very glad you brought this up. :)” End quote. So… Even though the user frustrated me, they still brought up some real problems and as a Furry myself, I believe the community can continue to learn more compassion and improve social skills with others outside the fandom. ALSO,  turns out, the user was just used to negativity and had become bitter.  As our conversation continued, we ACTUALLY agreed to disagree, and I’m thankful for the chance to learn. This is the change we need around the world. If after you read this, you find yourself in a situation of tension and disagreement, remember: 1. Find what you DO agree on. 2. Focus on how you both can benefit. 3. Sometimes, agree to disagree. Is it hard? Yes. But the effort to improve is so worth it. “Be the change you want to see in the world.” We don’t always witness how our kindness helps others. Thank you for reading this. I hope I can help you in some way. :)