★ for Bel9ved
It’s always been hard for him to put into words how he feels about Kathan.
Tarrak’s not a poet like him, can’t write as well as Bastet, doesn’t have the ability to twist words like Lulu.
Signless is- has always been- everything to Helmsman, from the night they met to the hapdash meetings in his dreams. Everything. It’s like breathing, to be in love with Kathan.
That’s why he can’t be honest with him. Why he has to bite back his feelings behind a grin and dumb jokes. Kathan is too good for what he is now. Still sees the best in him. It would be cruel to twist the knife further.












